I'm a bit rusty, haven't seen this movie for over a year! But enjoy anyway. (:
Lip balm
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He wondered what seeing would taste like. Sands knew that it didn't make sense, to associate every sense and feeling and act with a distinct flavor, but deep inside of him, perhaps in his taste buds, he knew that it was the only way to understand the fucked up world around him.
And he would never forget. Because no one in the whole fucking world would ever, ever, let him forget that he was just exactly who he was. And he felt it every morning, avoiding mirrors and windows that would display a reflection that he would never be able to see.
He had covered the glass panes in his motel with black curtains, just as the gaping, cavernous holes in his skull were hidden with a pair of unrevealing sunglasses. He would not be able see out. But most importantly, no one would be able to see in.
Failure tasted salty. And disappointment was bitter. But anguish was a molten flavor that lingered underneath his tongue.
So Sands kissed her until his mouth was bruised and raw, hoping to get rid of the wretched taste of his own distress and replace it with the rough feeling of control. He pushed her slicked hair away from his eyes as he ground his lips against hers, hoping, praying, wishing and desiring. Her arms were deathly thin, her hair was scraggly and short, her face caked with powder and rouge. Not ideal, but in the moment, all his.
His sunglasses slid sloppily down the bridge of his nose as he leaned against her, bittersweet and powerful, but the sound of her gasp was the taste of a pill, the feel of her hands as they pulled back from his hips the acidic flavor of vomit and her fading, echoing footsteps down the hallway: blood.
Sands slid against the grated wall and crumpled on the dirty floorboards. He wanted to be shaken. He wanted to be held. He wondered what it would feel like to rig the game, to have a voice, to throw shapes and set them up. To throw shapes and watch them fall. He wondered what it would feel like to be in control again.
And not bothering to fix the dangling sunglasses from his face, he nudged a hand across those dark, hollow holes with that white hot feeling invading his mouth and wondered, fleetingly, what seeing would taste like.
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Hope you guys enjoyed, apologies once again for the "rustiness".
And review, por favor!