Disclaimer: I don't own Pokémon, how many snide comments will it take for you to get it?

Ah, one shots! I've never really did one before have I? Anyway, this one shot is a tribute for the two most popular shippings (AAML and AAMayL). With this, I hope to settle all the disputes in this one-shot. Enjoy!

Warning: All of the one shots are random and will be updated at random intervals. ANYTHING can happen!

Hi there! You guys may know me as the world's greatest Pokémon trainer, superhero, and all time favorite of the ladies, Ash Ketchum…of course I'm Pikachu! What do you mean I'm full of hot air? Oh fine, be like that! Alright, so I'm just your average 14 year old Pokémon trainer (who is hot with the chicks, Heheheh).

I'm sporting my super cool short sleeve blue sweater, standard blue jeans, and some old cross trainers. To complement my good looks I slip on my fingerless gloves and my super sexy, ultra cool, spiffy Pokémon league baseball cap (No touchie!)…Of course clothes are important Pikachu! What do you mean it's pointless in this one shot? Don't you think all the fan girls out there would like to know what I'm wearing? …Don't get smart with me you little rat! Why are you holding up three fingers? Read between the lines?

…

…

…

Why are you laughing? All you said was…HEY! GET BACK HERE! YEAH, YOU BETTER RUN!

Ahem, sorry for that interruption. Moving on…

During my travels, I've met tons of friends, Pokémon, enemies (worse being team Rocket's puns) and other stuff like that. I've fought against legendary Pokémon, and saved the world several times.

But nothing prepared me for this.

It all started when I met these two girls. One of them was my favorite red head, Misty Waterflower (A.K.A Mallet wielding fireball). She was a really good coach and long time friend, but her anger management needed some serious refining. The second girl was fairly new but just as good of a friend, May Maple (A.K.A. Ultra newbish klutz). She was a very sweet and kind person, but made blondes look coordinated (No offense). As I've traveled with these girls, I've gotten quite attached to them. I really couldn't picture my life without either of them, being the good friends that they are. But ever since I came back home things had gotten…weird. First thing was that the said girls had been extremely nice to me (which creeps me out to the max), then they were at each others throats like crazy. There was this one time where May made a smart comment about Misty. But the bad part was that they were in the kitchen.

Trust me people, the rumors are true. NEVER get a girl mad in the kitchen.

I almost lost my life there, but quick thinking and Pikachu's slopping ketchup eating habits caught her off guard and let us live to see another day. Currently, I'm in my room and about to go out for a walk. I opened the door only to be met by the most impatient faces I've ever seen.

"Ash, we need to talk..." The two girls said. The one of the right, Misty, was wearing her short sleeve yellow shirt and some yellow shorts. Her hair was fixed in the usual upside ponytail. The girl on the right, May, wore her usual red bandanna with black biker shorts and a red and white short sleeve shirt. I swallowed hard when I heard those words.

"Um…sure." I answered, frightened. They guided me down the stairs and towards the kitchen. It was a little past lunch so I didn't get the pleasure of smelling my mom's cooking. They sat me in a chair and gave me a stern glare.

"Alright, we want answers Ketchum!" Misty demanded. They took great displeasure in seeing my baffled expression.

"Who is it going to be Ash?" May asked. I'm not sure if they figured out yet, but I didn't know what they were talking about.

"Who...what?" I asked.

"Which one of us are you going to choose to be your girlfriend?" Misty cleared up.

"ORO?" I gave them shocked stares. You see what I had to deal with? I'm way too young for this stuff

"Who will it be?" Both demanded, towering over me.

This was trouble. I had to find a way to buy some time, or at least breathing space, so I gently pushed them back.

"Do you really want me to answer that now?" I asked them. They gave me a glare that clearly answered the question. "Okay…I'm guessing so. Let's see…" I look back and forth between them.

First, I need to list the good qualities of each, then I need to compare. Misty was there with me the longest of everyone I knew. I only knew May for a short time, so that's point one for Misty. May was very kind to me for a good portion of my trip while Misty nearly killed me more times then I could count, so that's one point for May. Misty could look very pretty when she wanted to, so she gets another point. But then again…May is pretty cute and adorable sometimes so that gets a point. According to my current score board…it's a tie. There's got to be a way to decide and stay alive at the same time.

"…Give me some time…until later on this afternoon…" I told them. After thinking about it, they nodded in agreement.

"Fine, until 5 in the afternoon." Misty said.

That's Misty for ya! Don't you love the way she plans your execution?

Well, the girls went about their two favorite pastimes: Killing each other and pleasing me (NOT in that way! Though I wouldn't mind…). It's half past 12, so that should be enough time, right?

Wrong!

Hours past by, and it was time for me to walk the last mile, which led to my room. I've spent the last few hours trying to figure a way out of this mess, and Pikachu's jokes weren't helping. This was the toughest decision I had to make. One would be happy, the other would kill me. There was only one real way to proceed with this decision and settle this once and for all.

"We're going to decide by flipping this coin!" I told them. They fell over stupidly.

"Your decision is going to be based on luck? That's crazy!" Misty shouted.

"Oh I see, so you're scared?" May taunted. I had to give it to her, she had guts.

"Tch, fine! Give me that blasted coin!" She tried to grab the coin, but May slapped her hand.

"No, let me flip it! She'll probably cheat somehow!"

"I'm not a cheater like you, you little ditz!"

"Don't call me that you Amazon!"

"Why you!" It soon erupted into a full blown cat fight. I could see my tanned, spiky brown haired friend, Brock (A.K.A. No eyed womanizer) at the corner of my eye, wearing his green T-shirt and grey cargo pants. He leaned against the door, looking very amused. Normally, I would be too, but this was getting out of hand real quick…plus my room was getting messy. Great, now their tearing at each other...tearing each other's clothes to be precise…

…I think I could wait just a little while longer…oh wait, my mom's coming, better wrap this up.

I clapped my hands loudly, trying to get their attention. "Alright girls, break it up!" They didn't respond. Jeez, their clothes are getting torn apart.

Must…resist…watching! Got to stop…sexy cat fight! I jumped into the fight in a rush attempt to break it up.

Bad idea.

"Ash, is everything okay up…oh my!" My mom gasped. I was sandwiched between May and Misty, whose clothes were fairly torn and revealing. My clothes were ruffled and dirty, as well as my hair. Brock's nose started to bleed from the interesting position we were in. Everything stopped as all three of us stare at my mom, speechless.

"Um…I-I can explain! It's not what it looks like!" I tried to convince her. Even though it was quite the comfortable position, it was the last thing I wanted my mom to see.

"No, no, go ahead. I'll just talk to you after you're…done…" Still shell-shocked, my slowly mom closed the door and left. The only ones in the room were two raging females, me and Brock. No one moved until a flash temporarily blinded us.

"I can't wait to develop these!" Brock grinned, holding a camera in his hands. Before we could kill him, he jumped down the stairs and ran like his life depended on it (which it did). After fixing ourselves (and discreetly wiping the nose bleed from my shirt), we decided that there would be no more fighting…at least until after the decision is made…and my mom left the house (though I didn't say that out loud). The girls stared intently at the coin, almost able to burn it with their very gaze. I gripped the coin tightly, praying for my safety after the coin made its decision. May was heads, Misty was tails. I just hoped that they wouldn't have my head or tail after this.

'I must believe…' I thought to myself. 'Heart of the coins…guide me!' After a few moments, I dramatically flipped the coin. "GO, COIN TOSS!" The coin flipped through the air in rapid succession. The girls clasped their hands together, wishing as hard as they could for the coin to fall in thier favor (and me wishing for my very survival). The coin landed on the wooden floor with a clank. It bounced once…twice…three times before landing on…sides? All three of us fell over in disbelief.

"Didn't see that coming." I mused aloud.

I took the coin and flipped it again, only for it land on sides again. I did it three more times, but the result was the same. That was just my luck. What were the odds?

"So…what's the decision?" May asked. It didn't land on May or Misty's side, so what was the verdict? I grinned widely when it hit me. Why didn't I think of this before?

"I've made my decision!" I announced. The girls gazed at me with hopeful eyes. "I choose both of you to be my girlfriend!"

"…"

"…"

"...What?"

2 minutes later…

"GET BACK HERE!" The girls shouted, carrying weapons of massive pain, otherwise known as mallets.

"It was the coin's decision, not mine!" I reasoned, running down the dirt road. I wonder why they didn't like the idea…

Was it something I said?

I hope you liked that little one shot! More wierdness to come! Reviews and request are welcomed! Any request or suggestions will be thought about and considered, so send them my way!