The horrifically familiar smell of sizzling skin.
Zeref had always suspected that the feeling of death would be very cold. That as the blood seeped from his form, so would the heat. He would be freezing, and alone, looking gratefully upon the face of the one who had triumphed over his immortal tyranny. That's how he thought it might go.
It wasn't the way he had expected, though. In this moment, not one aspect of the scenario was what he had expected. He wasn't supposed to complain, not after so much and so long, but he thought he was allowed at least a little leeway, given the circumstances.
A large, smoldering hole had been punched right through his sternum. Hot blood flooded over his lips and out the burning flesh that hadn't been instantly cauterized by the blow. It fucking hurt. But he was too weak to do much about it.
His head was laid limply on the shoulder of the perpetrator. His younger brother panted harshly below him, not bothering to throw Zeref's body off his own. Zeref himself could barely fathom the amount of magic power needed to break through his affliction. It must have been exhausting, in an extreme sense of the word.
And now it was time for the quiet finale.
Natsu somehow found the strength to stand, even with Zeref's dead weight, and wrapped a hand under his arm, clutching at the fabric and the groove of his closest shoulder blade. The other hand gripped at his waist. Natsu held Zeref close to him as he began to wobble over to nearby rubble, clumsily dragging the Black Wizard through debris. Not optimal, Zeref huffed internally, to try guiding a dying human with them in front of you. Nevertheless, there was the question of why he was doing him such a small kindness. It was unprecedented that anyone was acknowledging his death in any way. Despised creature that he was, he has always expected to be thrown in the dirt after his death, and certainly not being propped up against a wall, with some small amount of hospitality.
Natsu collapsed beside him. His breathing was growing steadier, but perhaps weaker. Sweat trickled off his brow, his face pale and haggard. His body, speckled with other gaping wounds and bruises, didn't look like it was fairing any better. Zeref couldn't imagine that it was.
Many quiet moments passed. The sounds of the two people breathing was deafening in the silence. From Natsu's now weak and quietly starved struggles, to Zeref's ghostly death rattle through his punctured lungs. He suspected Ankseram was the only thing keeping him alive at the moment. It would just be a waiting game at this point, and Zeref considered himself very patient.
Natsu, perhaps not as much.
"Hey, Zeref," his voice was surprisingly strong, for a currently dying person, though it was significantly weaker than normal. "You're still alive... right?"
It took a lot of energy to flick his eyes to Natsu's general location and blink slowly.
"Figures. Must be the immortality." Natsu began to rasp. "But it's not gonna last much longer, I guess."
Hardly. Zeref blinked again.
"So, I guess... I mean, I'm really..." he choked on something unidentifiable for a brief moment before collecting himself. "I'm really going to die. I-if what you said is- is really true."
Zeref let a small, hoarse noise escape him. It was all he could manage, but if Natsu heard it, he didn't say anything.
"So I... want to talk with someone... before I have to go." His breathing was now a bit more labored. "I didn't really... want it to be you, but..."
Zeref knew this. Didn't blame him. Averted his gaze from him.
"I'm just now realizing that... I dunno, I should have asked... more questions..."
"I never really... learned anything substantial about you... until the end."
Zeref closed his eyes. He registered Natsu coughing weakly. For now, it might be better to focus on the sounds.
"I know the 1st loved you and all, but... I never really understood why... Didn't think it was possible for you to... love someone... Not you."
Zeref himself has pondered that on many occasions. A crippling doubt that made him backtrack and despair more times than he could count.
"Was it out of love? Was it... self... satisfaction?" The words were far quieter and came more slowly than when they began. "If it was love... then... why... did you... make it so...?"
He didn't finish, but Zeref could infer easily, even in this hazy state.
"...other...demons," he breathed. He could sense Natsu's snap to attention and his desperation to hear, to some degree. "...fail...safe..."
"Oh."
Zeref opened his eyes again in the muffled silence. Everything was darker and blurry. That didn't stop him from discerning the state of his brother. His eyes were wide, but his form otherwise limp. He was even paler now. And he was looking at him.
"Are you..." Zeref paused to collect himself. "scared?"
Natsu let out a weak chuckle.
"Aren't you?"
Zeref didn't want to complain, had no right to, but the circumstances in which he died were ones he found less than ideal. He did not get what he had given. His death was warm and slow, like a cradle. There was kindness after his slaughter. He was allowed a conversation.
And he had scared a person he cared for.
There was no triumph. His death was not celebrated. It was quiet, near unnoticed. But no one really mourned either. Maybe Mavis would, after some long, hard thought.
In the freezing evening in which the bodies of the brothers were found, close observers might have sworn that the elder had put one hand on the other's, as a mote of comfort in their passing.
But they were separated at their finding, so who knew, really.
AN:/ i promised myself i wasnt gonna write any more fanfiction and yet i wrote this stupid thing in like half an hour what IS THIS.
*coughs*
you know what fucks me up? the dragneel bros. or zeref dragneel in general, take your pick.
there is a HIGHLY DISTURBING lack of zeref introspective or centric fics, and this is PREPOSTEROUS because he is so interesting, and i propose a movement to change that.
also: the fail safe thing. this is speculation on my part; there are multiple reasons why things could be the way they are. i just think that one is one of the more plausible reasons.
ok bye