"I couldn't stay away."
"From the show or her?"
Even as Jesse played the scene over and over in his head, he still could not manage to wrap his head around it. Rachel had kissed Finn. Finn, she had picked him and this time Jesse was the one left to wound a broken heart.
One Week later…
Jesse looked over as his phone buzzed on the night table beside him. Will Schuester Text Message shone brightly on his phone screen. In all honesty Jesse had little desire to respond that would mean dealing with New Directions and that would mean dealing with her. Jesse groaned as he realized two things simultaneously: one he was the glee club consultant and had no choice but to answer Will and two was the headache he had felt coming on last night had proceeded to worsen. Groaning he reached out and grabbed his phone sensing that this would be one more day he'd wish would have never happened.
Will looked at his phone, checking for a return message from Jesse. If he were honest Jesse wasn't his favorite person but he had to admit the kid could dance, and the kid knew show choirs. Worst of all Will knew that he needed his help. Soon after they had returned from Nationals, Figgins had called Will into his office and asked if the Glee club could perform for their Senior Grad Night, as the band he had hired originally had once again bailed. Will had accepted on the term that Figgins added two hundred dollars to the Glee budget for next year. Figgins had argued the point but in the end Will had won the battle. The problem being now was coming up with enough songs for a four hour-long event. Which is why promptly that morning he had send Jesse a message describing the situation and asking if he could come to glee rehearsal today with some ideas. Even as he though about it he heard his phone buzz as Jesse responded: I will be there, just make sure your glee kids are ready.
Jesse took another gulp of water as he pulled into the McKinley parking lot. He hoped that Will only needed him for ideas today, the headache he had woken up had turned into a full blown migraine and Jesse knew that he was far from his best migraine aside he had been denying the first signs of a cold all day, but even now as he sat in his car, waiting for the final bell to ring he could feel his throat was sore, his nose was stuffed and he was pretty sure he had developed a fever about two hours ago. The thing that Jesse hated was that if he was anybody else he would have had the sense to stay home, but he wasn't anybody. He had been the star of vocal adrenaline and that had taught him that unless you were dead or dying you gave the performance of your life, every time. It was with that mentality in mind he took another sip of his water bottle and headed towards the McKinley doors.
Jesse made his way quietly to the choir room, to wait for Will and the rest of his kids to make their way there from whatever class they had been stuck in. What he didn't expect was to see someone already sitting there, but there she was…Rachel. "Jesse I didn't know you were coming to today's rehearsal" Jesse didn't respond at first, partially because he didn't know what to say and partially because he didn't know what to say and partially because a sudden bout of dizziness had taken most of his attention. "Jesse?" Rachel's voice held questions, questions Jesse didn't want to answer. "Well Mr. Shue sent me message requesting my presence so here I am." Jesse finally answered hoping that, she would take the hint and leave him to his own peace and quiet. Then again this was Rachel and Jesse knew better than to expect that. He looked around in vain hoping that someone, anyone would walk into the choir room and prevent her from continuing Rachel from talking but the room was still eerily empty. "You know Finn is a good guy Jesse, he is good for me." There it was Rachel in all her subtlety. "Rachel," He paused not knowing how to continue. He was about to respond when suddenly Will popped his head into the choir room door. " There you guys are, I tried to find you to tell you we are meeting in the auditorium today, dance rehearsal." Grateful Jesse followed Will down the hall choosing not to glance back at Rachel who was trailing behind both of them.
Will wasn't quite sure what to think about finding Jesse and Rachel together.
It hadn't taken long to hear that Finn and Rachel were back together again. Most people weren't surprised, but then again most of them didn't know what Will knew. When Jesse had taken a seat next to him at Nationals Will knew it wasn't to watch New Directions, it wasn't even to watch vocal adrenaline, no Jesse had come to watch Rachel. Now Will wasn't quite sure what to think. Deciding he would just wait and see how things played out Will turned to his glee club and rehearsal began.
The first few acts were, thankfully for Jesse, solo acts and Will did not ask for many of his opinions. Unfortunately the first up to sing had been Mercedes and Kurt and between Mercedes's diva volume and the high pitched voice of Kurt, Jesse was now debating whether his het would explode or melt first. As the debate raged on in his head Will turned to him "Jesse I think this next group number needs a little …help choreography wise…would you?" He nodded afraid of what he would sound like now. As Will turned to address the Glee club and tell them the plan, Jesse took the time to mentally prepare himself. He could hear Shelby's voice ringing through his head "Unless you are being carried off unconscious to the hospital, I want to see a look so optimistic it could cure cancer". If he had survived four years of that surely he could survive a little cold, even if he had to admit the migraine wasn't optimal he was Jesse and he would do this.
Will watched as Jesse took the stage. "Follow if you can" Jesse stated as he started in on the number. Mike, Santana, Quinn and Brittany were matching Jesse almost move for move, however impressive as it was, their success was slightly undermined by Finn, Puck and Lauren, all of who were at least two moves behind. Even if he didn't always approve of Jesse he did have to admit, that as bad as some kids still were at dancing, they had improved since Jesse had started working with them. Just as he was watching Jesse began to slow his pace. It struck him as odd since they were approaching the most upbeat part of the soon. It was only seconds after that, when Jesse collapsed on the middle of the stage.
Every muscle he had was protesting as he took his place on the stage. Once the music started Jesse could feel the rush of performing hit him, but it seemed to be significantly diminished by the pounding in his head and the fever he was sure that he was spiking. He could feel his muscles trying to tighten in protest but Jesse knew he couldn't give up not now. He almost didn't notice the sense of weakness that was coming over him until the blackness started to consume his sight.
"Jesse!" Rachel yelled louder than anyone else and was by far the fastest one to reach the spot where Jesse had fallen only a few seconds before. Mr. Shue though he had the farthest to run was the second at the fallen boy's side. The rest of glee club seemed too shocked to move. Rachel knelt by Jesse trying to rouse the fallen performer. "Jesse? Come on Jesse wake up". Will came up behind her; using basic first aid he had been taught his first year of teaching. He checked Jesse's pulse and breathing, noting as he did the immense heat radiating from Jesse's skin. "Rachel, when you and Jesse were talking did he say anything about being sick?" Will asked hoping that the girl would know something "He didn't say anything, just hello. he will be ok won't he?" "I hope so." Finn and the other glee clubbers had gathered together just off stage, leaving the two room to breathe. So none of them heard him come to, whispering one word "Rachel".
As Jesse began to come to, he noticed several things the most pressing were the hands he felt cradling his head. "Rach?" He opened his eyes despite the harsh light and found two faces staring back at him. Will was the first to talk. "Jesse, hey do you think you can sit up and drink some water?" Jesse made his best attempt but ended up having Will help him up. However once up Jesse was grateful for the glass of water that Rachel was holding. Jesse took in taking a few sips gingerly, testing his throat. Once Jesse had finished Will turned to him "Ok I'll be right back guys, I am just going to let the rest of the guys know we are done for the day". Once he was out of earshot Rachel rounded on Jesse "You're an idiot, you know that right? What were you even thinking coming to rehearsal that sick?" Despite the fact that his migraine had significantly lessened there was still a dull throbbing in his head and he didn't think that listening to Rachel ramble on and on was going to help him. "Look Rachel, I don't know why you're still here but its obvious you don't want to be so just leave. I can take care of myself." "Right that's why you collapsed in the middle of rehearsal?"
Luckily for Jesse Will came back at that moment preventing him from having to answer Rachel's question. "Ok how are we holding up over here?" Jesse opened his mouth to answer but Rachel beat him to the punch." He drank the water, and he seems to remember most everything but he is still pretty feverish from the feel of it." "Ok Jesse, do you think you are ready to head out, I want the nurse to take a look at you before I take you home." Despite his better instincts Jesse returned to his Vocal Adrenaline mindset. "Really I'm fine, I had a migraine and those lead to dizzy spells sometimes, I just need to go home and sleep the rest of it off." Jesse knew his voice was hoarse and weak sounding but he but on his best show face smile and stood up in a hope to show them that he was fine and hoping they would quit pestering him.
Rachel watched as Jesse stood up in an attempt to prove to and her that he was fine. She hoped that Mr. Shue was recognizing just as she was that Jesse was anything but fine. As she looked at it was apparent that he was thinking the same thing she was. Jesse seemed to be sensing this too. He took and went just out of Rachel's hearing range. She waited impatient, she didn't even know why she was impatient, she didn't even know why she had stayed. She was with Finn now wasn't she? She loved Finn, she didn't love Jesse not anymore, but some part of her knew that even as she told herself that Finn was the one for her, some other part of her mind knew she was wrong. Pulling her out of her thoughts was the return of Jesse and Mr. Shue. Jesse had if possible become even paler, yet he was wearing a triumphant smile on his face that concerned Rachel even more. Before she could ask Mr. Shue answered her unanswered question "Ok Rachel, Jesse is going to head home and I suggest you do the same, I'll see you tomorrow Rachel, Jesse feel better soon" She couldn't believe her ears as Mr., Shue turned to head back to his office and Jesse turned to head out the auditorium doors towards the parking lot. She stood frozen for a moment before heading after Jesse.
He was all in all proud of himself. He had been in Vocal Adrenaline far too long to let something like a cold take him down. Despite Will's intention to get him checked out Jesse had managed to avoid showing more weakness than he already had. Will had been easy enough to convince; migraine plus dehydration had been enough of an excuse to keep Will from pushing further. Now that he was alone Jesse could allow himself to really take inventory of how he was feeling. It was no longer just the beginnings of a cold but rather a full blown one. The slight ache in his throat was now both sore and burning, his sinuses were stuffed and as much as he didn't want to admit it he had a fever that was hanging somewhere between 101 and 102. He could not wait to be able to get home and sleep this monstrosity off. He had unlocked his car and was about to get in when he heard her.."Jesse!" Sighing he knew that the faster he could convince her the faster he could get home so he turned around and waited for her to reach his car. "Where do you think your going?" "I'm going home Rachel, like I told Mr. Shue I had a migraine I got dehydrated, I passed out. You guys got water in me so I am just going to head home and sleep the rest of the migraine off." He told her the basics just as he had told Will the difference was Rachel didn't seem to be buying a word. "You were in Vocal Adrenaline and you're telling me you passed out from dehydration?" Her voice was full of skepticism that granted was deserved. Jesse however had little patience to deal with skeptic Rachel today, all he wanted was to get home and sleep for days. "Look Rachel I know exactly what my limits are and I know what I want. All I want right now is to go home and sleep it off. So I will go do my thing and you can go find your precious football player, I'm sure he is wandering around somewhere looking for you" Jesse swallowed that had hurt his throat more than he had thought it would, trying to keep the pain out of his face he instead turned to watch Rachel's. At first she looked mad but something else was hiding behind anger, something that looked almost like sadness. Rachel started cautiously as though not sure how to phrase what she wanted to say. "Finn is the safe choice for me Jesse, he doesn't want to hurt me, he loves me." Another time Jesse would have argued the point, asked Rachel if she couldn't see that he loved her too. Now however she had given him the perfect out. "So then go Rachel, go find him, just let me go." He turned to get back in the car. "I cant do that, because I do love Finn, but the fact is Jesse whether I like it or not I love you too. I love you and I am not letting you drive home sick, you'd probably crash anyway." She said quietly. "Rachel, you picked him, you chose him so please just go be with him" It might have worked, but Jesse's cold seemed to be getting worse by the minute, he began to cough violently.
As soon as Jesse began to cough Rachel had made up her mind. Despite what he told her it was clear Jesse was sick. His wants be damned she wasn't going to let his pride kill him at least not today.
Jesse barely had time to register that anything was happening. An unexpected coughing fit had left him winded and he was now leaning heavily on his car for support. The next thing he knew Rachel was opening the backseat of his car, unaware as to how she had even gotten his keys, he was far too exhausted to argue when she helped him into his backseat. Not having the energy to fight Jesse remained complacent as Rachel got him settled. Once she had closed the door he leaned his head against the cool window next to him. The refreshing coolness of the window felt amazing against his burning forehead and he found himself nodding off.
As Rachel finished adjusting the seat of Jesse's car, she realized that since he had come back she had no idea where he was living. She turned around to ask him but found him to be fast asleep. Not wanting to disturb him she made the decision to head to the only place he knew. After about thirty minutes of driving and a few wrong turns Rachel finally arrived at her destination, Jesse's uncle's house. She had been here a few times when they were dating and was grateful she had been able to remember the address. She thought about rousing Jesse from his slumber in the back, but decided that it would be better to make sure his uncle was home first. Decision firmly made in her head Rachel made her way to the front door and knocked. A few seconds passed and the door opened. Rachel had always found Jesse's uncle to be quite friendly, and was relieved when he opened the door. "Miss Rachel, what a lovely surprise." "Hello John" Rachel responded knowing full well that he preferred his first name, he used to tell her the Mr. St. James was a name reserved for stiffs like his father and brother. John seemed unsure of what to say next and seemed to be waiting for Rachel to explain her sudden appearance on his doorstep. "John I need your help, well actually Jesse needs your help." John appeared quite alarmed and proceeded to ask Rachel an onslaught of questions, trying to determine what kind of assistance would be needed. Rachel had always appreciated the amount of concern the John had for Jesse. It was admirable and far better than the concern his parents felt for him. As Rachel finished her thought, John decided that his questions were getting him nowhere and he stopped and waited for Rachel to explain the reason for her visit. "I think that it would be best to show you" Rachel said slowly and she waved her hand at Jesse's SUV that was sitting in front of his house. John scrambled to get his flip-flops on, not bothering with real shoes at the moment and followed Rachel back to the car. Rachel went around to the opposite side of the car and signaled for John to do the same. It wasn't until she opened the backseat passenger door that he saw why. Jesse was sleeping, his head against the window of the opposite side. If Rachel had opened that door Jesse would have fallen without the window there to support him. He took in Jesse's appearance, the kid was white as a sheet, with flushed cheeks no doubt a sign of fever. Rachel tapped his shoulder and he pulled his head out of the car to look at her. Rachel was explaining to him that Jesse had collapsed during one of their glee rehearsals. She went on explaining every detail with the same concerned tone he himself had when it came to Jesse. She finished by saying "I'm sorry I just didn't know where else to take him." "It's alright Rachel, you were right to bring him to me since he clearly can't take care of himself. We need to get him inside, if you can wake him up I can support him till we get him inside." Rachel nodded and John went around to the other side of the car. Rachel slid in the backseat next to Jesse; she shook his shoulder lightly, and could feel him groan slightly. She shook him a little harder this time and he slowly lifted his head off the window to gaze at her. "Rach?" "Yeah Jesse, it's me, listen I need you to lean over here ok, you're sick and we are going to help you but we have to get you inside first." Jesse blinked slowly his fever clearly catching up with him as he struggled to make sense of her words. "We?" He asked finally, she nodded and tapped on the window behind him to let John know it was safe to open the door. Jesse turned as the door opened. "Uncle John?" "Hey kid, heard you're not doing too hot." Jesse nodded and with the help of both Rachel and John, stood up shakily and allowed himself to be led into the guest bedroom he had stayed in during his stint at McKinley. Feeling far too exhausted to stay awake; Jesse fell back asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. John and Rachel watched as Jesse closed his eyes once more. John turned to Rachel. "Thank you for bringing him here Rachel, I can take it from here." Rachel seemed to hesitate for a moment looking at Jesse, then turned to look at John. "If you don't mind John I'd like to stay and help you." "Wont your dads be just a bit concerned if you don't come home soon?" "I called them on my way over, Bluetooth" She explained when I shot her a questioning look. "They don't necessarily understand why I want to stay, but they said that if you approve they wouldn't mind. It is Friday after all and we have Monday off for grading." John pondered Rachel for a moment and nodded. "To be honest, I'll be grateful for the company." Rachel smiled. "Can you sit with him, I need to go grab my thermometer and maybe a few more supplies." He added the last bit after Jesse began coughing in his sleep. Rachel nodded and moved towards the edge of the bed as John left to scour the house for supplies. Rachel ran her fingers over Jesse's forehead, pushing his curls out of his face. She smiled softly, Jesse looked so vulnerable at the moment, so much like he had when they had been together. There were no walls today, just Jesse. In an attempt to make him more comfortable Rachel moved down to remove his shoes. She had just managed to get the first shoe off when John came bustling back in the room with what looked like half his medicine closet. "Ok first things first, we need to know how high his fever is." John dug through his pile of supplies and pulled out a fairly new looking digital thermometer, just as Rachel finished pulling of Jesse's second shoe. She placed them neatly by the wall and went over to where John was sitting. He was rubbing small circles on Jesse's back trying to get Jesse to wake up enough to put the thermometer in his mouth.
Jesse was sure that he was in hell. He felt as though his whole body was on fire. He wanted so desperately to sleep, to escape this burning but he could feel somebody's hand on his back. He opened his eyes slowly and found himself face to face with his uncle John. "Hey Jess" his uncle greeted. "I need you to open your mouth ok? I know your not feeling too good but I have to know how high your fever is." Jesse reluctantly opened his mouth and John stuck the thermometer under his tongue and held it there. A minute later, John pulled it out of his mouth. "Ok bud, you can go back to sleep now." Relieved Jesse fell back into the pillows. John signaled to Rachel that they should move out of the room to talk. "How high is it?" She asked. "103.4" He responded. "We need to get it down ,he continued, then hopefully he will be a little more awake and can tell us what really happened at your rehearsal. I will give him so ibuprofen and we can see where he is after that." "What about a cool washcloth?" Rachel asked, "that's what my dads do for me when I have a fever and it seems to help me." John nodded in approval. "Ok, I'll go get some water for him to take the ibuprofen with, do you remember where the bathroom is?" Rachel nodded and each went there separate ways. John wasn't exactly sure what to think of Rachel's determination to help her take care of Jesse. Since he had returned from UCLA, Jesse hadn't talked to him much. He had called him once or twice just to tell him that he was back in the area, but apart from that John had no knowledge of what had been going on with Jesse. The water cup he had been filling now full he made his way back to Jesse's room. Rachel wasn't sure exactly what had caused her to stay. She knew that John was more than capable of taking care of Jesse without her help, but she wanted to be here for Jesse, she wanted to take care of him. She was pulled out of her thoughts be her phone buzzing in her pocket. Where are you? –Finn.
Sigh, she knew she would have to talk to Finn eventually but at the moment Jesse needed her more. She finished getting a damp washcloth ready making a mental note to ask John to get her a bowl for of water so she did not have to keep coming to the bathroom to keep wetting it. She made her way to Jesse's room, as John was coming out. "I just got him to take the ibuprofen and I noticed how late it was, I was going to make some dinner. Is pasta ok?" John asked. "Pasta is great, I was wondering if you could get me a bowl with cool water for the cloth?" John nodded and headed toward the kitchen. I made my way into the room and sat down on the edge of the bed. I laid the washcloth against his forehead and kept my hand there, keeping it in place. Jesse was laying on his side and the washcloth wouldn't stay otherwise. It seemed like only a few minutes later though I know it must have been longer that John came back into the room to tell me that dinner was ready. He must have sensed my hesitation to move because he tapped my shoulder gently. "He'll be ok Rachel." I nodded and followed John out to his kitchen. We ate mostly in silence but John eventually put his fork down and looked at me. "Rachel, I don't mean to pry, but you and Jesse are you?" He didn't seem to want to finish but I didn't need him to. "No, we aren't" John nodded he seemed unsure of what to say next. "I don't know why I'm here either." John flushed "I didn't mean to imply anything like that, I mean.. I wasn't trying to say..". "John it's ok, I know you were just trying to make sense of it all, to tell you the truth so am I. I thought that I had moved on, he was in L.A and I thought it was all over. I'm in a relationship and the guy is really a nice guy but" I faltered not sure I should be saying all of this and not sure what I needed to say, but John seemed to know "but he isn't Jesse, it's ok Rachel I'm not going to say anything but I do see the way you look at him in there." I was sure that I flushed a deep scarlet, I moved to start clearing dishes but John stopped me. "Rachel I can do this, go be with him." I turned to go he called after me "Rachel, if it makes a difference I'm willing to bet he never moved on either." My mind was racing as I made my way back to Jesse. John's words should not be having this effect on me, should they? The problem being that John hadn't brought up anything new. As safe as I felt with Finn, there was simply a connection I had with Jesse that Finn could never compare with. Jesse was a performer, he understood all of my hopes and desires and as much as Finn tried he could never escape his football jock mindset. I sighed and decided to push the thoughts aside for now. I entered Jesse's darkened room. Prepared to sit by his side again I was surprised to see that even though the room was dark, Jesse seemed to be sitting up slightly on the bed. He turned slowly to face the door as I moved into the room. "Rachel?" He rasped.
Jesse had awoken only minutes before Rachel Berry entered his room. He had been trying to piece together how he had ended up in his bedroom at his uncle's house. The day seemed to have been lost to him and it seemed as though the more he tried to remember what had happened, the more the dull remnants of a headache seemed to increase. He had just stopped trying to figure it all out when he heard the door to the room open and he became even more confused when he found himself staring into the concerned face of Rachel Berry. He could hardly stop himself from croaking out her name, growing vaguely concerned at how hoarse his voice sounded. "Jesse," Rachel responded stepping quickly into the room until she was standing right next to the bed. "I didn't know you were awake, I mean are you ok? Do you need water or anything?" Jesse was taking in her words, his brain seemed to be working slowly and it took him a minute to assess what she was asking. Once he had realized that she was asking about his wellbeing he suddenly took notice of how crappy he was feeling. The dull ache in his head he realized was only one of many symptoms. Jesse noticed the Rachel was holding a water bottle out to him and with shakey hands he reached out and grabbed it. Thankfully she had already unscrewed the lid and so he was able to sip it immediately and was grateful that the cool water seemed to ease the burning sensation in his throat. After he was done he handed the bottle back to Rachel and she set it on the nightstand behind her. "Better?" Rachel asked and Jesse rasped out "a little" "sounds like you still need to rest that voice " Rachel replied gently with just a touch of sarcasm. "What happened?" He croaked. "Well if memory serves that was what we were hoping that you could tell us." A voice called out and both Jesse and Rachel turned to see John entering the room. "All I know is what Rachel managed to tell me when she brought you here, which apparently wasn't a lot." John came into the room now and sat down on the side of the bed opposite Rachel. "So what do you say do you think you are feeling up to telling me what happened?" Jesse looked from John to Rachel, "I can try but you might want to go first." With that Jesse broke off into a coughing fit and John and Rachel shot each other a furtive glance. "Ok, Rachel can tell you what we know and then we will see if you can fill in the blanks ok?" Jesse nodded and turned to accept the water from Rachel, and then returned to laying back on the pillow as she began to speak. "Well I don't really know a lot, you came to rehearsal and you seemed kind of quiet but after that you went to go sit up with Mr. Shue and then I didn't really see you again until the group number you came down to work on it but you collapsed in the middle of the number. and I came to help and you felt pretty feverish, tried to convinve you to see the nurse but you managed to convinve him that you had a migraine and got dehydrated. I followed you out to your car and you had a coughing fit so I brought you here." "Where we found out that you were running a fever of almost 104, now we have cooled you down a bit but lets see how much?" He nodded to Rachel and she handed him a thermometer that was laying on the nightstand next to the water. He turned it on and held it towards Jesse who simply opened his mouth. He sat there for a few moments until he heard the beep beep that indicated that the thermomerter was finished. John removed it glanced at the reading for a second and then showed the number to Rachel . "102" John resonded to Jesse's questioning look. Rachel had disappeared out of the room and John turned back to look at Jesse. "Look sport, we want to get you some medicine to help you but we need to know for sure what's wrong do you think you can tell us anything?" Jesse nodded slowly feeling slightly drowsy but determined all the same. Rachel had come back in the room with a bowl. She moved to sit near him and he found himself pleasantly surprised to feel a cool cloth being placed on his forehead. Jesse found himself closing his eyes, but John shook his shoulder, "Not yet, Jesse, now can you tell me what happened? Just nod yes or no." Jesse nodded yes warily. "Ok now do you remember did you have a migraine this morning? " Jesse nodded the lingering pounding in his head was proof to that. "Did you take any of your meds?" Jesse couldn't remember taking anything so he shook his head slowly. He found himself fighting harder to stay awake, he just felt so tired and the cloth Rachel was holding against his forehead wasn't helping. "Jesse" Rachel's voice was soft and close Jesse realized as he saw her leaning over to look at him. "John and Rachel were both looking curiously at him and he realized they must have asked him a question. "We just wanted to know if you were feeling sick before rehearsal?" Rachel repeated softly. Jesse was quiet for a moment thinking back to what he could remember and also trying hard not to get lost in thought about Rachel. He nodded his head after a while, vaguely remembering something about that. John placed his hand on Jesse's leg and then he and Rachel both stood up. "We will be back," John told him "We are just going to let you sleep some more." Jesse barely heard him, no longer needing to answer any questions he was losing the battle to stay awake.
Rachel followed John out of Jesse's room and back into the kitchen. John moved and opened a drawer pulling out a notepad and a pen. He began writing down a list and Rachel sat there waiting for him to finish. After a few seconds she cleared her throat unobtrusively. John glanced up "sorry Rachel, just got a bit distracted. I was just thinking of all the things we might need and if I have them here or not." "Will we really need that much stuff?" John chuckled, "well for a normal person no, but my nephew has a knack for being dramatic, which I'm sure you know, and that carries over into when he is sick as well. We could be in for a rough night." Rachel nodded. John seemed to be finalizing his list and then he turned to her. "Rachel I think I am going to run to the store, would you be comfortable staying with him?" "I think I can handle Jesse for a bit yeah." Rachel smiled. John smiled back at her and gathered up his wallet and car keys and left for the store. Rachel decided she would head back into Jesse's room just in case he needed anything. When she entered he was sleeping, his head resting gently between the two pillows. He looked oddly childlike since his normally coiffed curls were not falling unceremoniously on his forehead. It brought about a look of innocence to his face. She took the chair John had held earlier and started to hum the first Broadway songs that came into her head. She was just starting in on Rent, when Jesse started to stir.
If anyone asked Jesse how he was, he was tempted to say that being hit by a bus would be an understatement. There wasn't a part of his body that wasn't aching. The only thing he could say was that he was feeling a bit more alert than he had been earlier. He noted that gratefully someone had turned the lights off and he blearily opened his eyes. The room was empty however there was a seat next to his bed that suggested that someone had been here not long before. Jesse noticed that there seemed to be an arsenal of medical supplies next to the bed and he couldn't help but chuckle to himself, his uncle was something of a worry-wort and Jesse was sure that his uncle had placed just about every possible medicine on the table next to him. He also noticed with a bang that his throat was aching, hoping that a bit of water would ease the pain he pushed the covers off of him, swung his legs over the side of the bed. He leaned against the wall for support as he stood up, feeling slightly lightheaded as he did so, he moved towards the door. As he moved down the hallway he heard a voice coming from the kitchen, "Yeah John he was starting to wake up, when I left him. I'm in the kitchen now, making him some tea with honey, figured it might help him feel better. Rachel, Jesse sighed, he had forgotten that Rachel was here, taking care of him. He moved to her voice, noticing that it was clearly night, and wondering slightly what time it was. He finally made his way into the kitchen where Rachel was busily searching the cabinets searching for what Jesse assumed was honey, for the steaming cup of tea on the counter. "One more over should do the trick." He croaked. Rachel turned at the sound of him. "Jesse, you're awake, and up, and you should sit down she said as she rushed to guide him to one of the chairs around John's table. Jesse took the chair gratefully. Rachel, having finally located the honey, set down a cup of tea in front of him, and eyed him warily.
He reached out to grab the tea but Rachel stopped him suddenly, "I forget we should take your temperature before you drink the tea and it messes with the readings." "Will you be ok here while I run and grab it?" "I'll be fine Rach, it's not like I'm going to go anywhere." She grinned slightly and ran out of the room. She was back in what seemed like seconds to Jesse. "Alright mister, under the tongue, two minutes. He wasn't about to argue and stuck the thermometer under his tongue. Rachel moved to stand behind him rubbing his back when a sudden thought came into his head, the best he could with the thermometer in his mouth and asked her "were you singing rent earlier?" She gently slapped his head, "no talking, but yes I was among other things." He chuckled to himself. After what seemed like forever the thermometer in his mouth beeped and Rachel pulled it out. Although the reading didn't erase all the worry lines her face was currently carrying it did seem to erase a few. Jesse took a sip of the tea before asking "How hot am I doc?" "101.6" She responded. "Still not great but better than you were before. How are you doing by the way, do you want to go lay back down?" Jesse had little desire to go back into the bedroom so he offered up the couch as an alternative and Rachel helped him into the living room. "So?" Rachel prompted "you seem more awake than earlier" Jesse nodded "yeah I feel more awake, still tired though and my throat still hurts." Rachel nodded sympathetically. "Yeah I would imagine that you wouldn't be feeling 100% since it was only 5 hours ago that you had a fever of 104." "104, quite a fun time I'm assuming?" "Well you were asleep for most of it. Speaking of which, why didn't you stay in bed today if you didn't feel well?" "I didn't think that it was anything to worry about just felt like a slight cold this morning and Shelby had us work through anything less than pneumonia." Rachel thought about trying not to think about her mother in such harsh manner. "Your mom isn't some kind of slave driver Rach, most of us would have come to rehearsal anyway, your mom was simply setting a limit for us." Rachel nodded but still was contemplating this thought. Jesse reached for her hand squeezing it lightly. The heat still radiating from him was enough to jolt her thoughts back to the here and now and the still very ill Jesse St. James that sat in front of her. "We should get you back to bed." "Ah come on Rachel I just managed to get out of bed." She almost thought about believing him except as she watched he tried to suppress a shiver. "Well since you're the one who didn't think to stay in bed the first time it's time to pay the piper." Jesse nodded his consent hesitantly sensing that it was useless trying to argue with her. "One condition Rachel and then I will go to bed, drink tea, take whatever godforsaken medicine that you and my uncle deemed appropriate." "What do you want Jesse?" "You brought me here, you took care of me, and despite anyone telling you different you stayed, which says even more for you since you know I am contagious and knowing that you are risking your voice just saying here." Jesse's voice was getting dangerously hoarse as he ended his statement. Rachel kept quiet knowing what he clearly wanted to know. She waited and when Jesse seemed incapable of continuing even using the tea he had in front of him. "You want to know why?" He nodded thankful that she had finished the question for him. "You know you did already ask me this earlier if you remember." "I remember, but that was before you stayed." He rasped. They both sat there in silence each wondering what the other was thinking. " You are me Jesse, you understand every part of me, why I do what I do, and I would never have to explain any of my performance actions to you. You hurt me and part of me knows that if you mean to or not you will still keep hurting me because you would do anything for your career. Even if that meant hurting me, and for a long time I wasn't ok with that, but after you left I did some things that nobody understood, I fought for my career and it was then when I realized that I had nobody else that I wished for you, because you would understand. So I won't leave you alone now, I won't let you get hurt or damaged because you are the other half of my coin and I need you. I love you and that will not ever change." "I love you too Rachel, and I think you already knew that. I knew that I was sick today, I knew that by going I would get worse, but I needed to see you, to watch you perform, it makes me feel alive to listen to you because I know that you and I know the true heart and soul that it takes to perform like we do, we know that we must give our lives to perform, and we know that we can do both together, we can live and perform as long as we do it together." The two marveled in this fact knowing that they could get through almost anything together. They sat there cuddling on the couch holding each other Rachel moving only to get a blanket for Jesse to keep him warm enough and to set a dvd in the case for them to watch. It was that way that John found them later, curled together on the couch both fast asleep with Spring Awakening playing on the tv in front of them. He smiled knowing that this was the only medicine that Jesse had needed all along.