AN: A short one-shot that revolves around Gintoki and Kagura's relationship. Written as a celebratory post for my new writing blog, which can be found on my profile. The blog will have more Gintama drabbles in the future, so if you're interested do look out for it. You can request for fics as well, if you'd like! Apologies for my other series, I am aware of how some of you are anticipating for the updates, but I'm afraid you will have to wait a little more. In the mean time, I hope you enjoy this little drabble.
They don't ever leave him.
No matter how much he wishes for sweet dreams of endless parfaits and smooth, straight hair, he knows they will never happen. He knows this because all he recalls of his dreams are nightmares of blood-stained battlefields, and the fearsome white demon with an insatiable thirst for war.
Gintoki tries to run away in all of his nightmares, only to see the bodies pile up in front of him wherever he goes. It sickens him - not just the rotting smell of the corpses or the guts spilling out in front of his eyes. The thing that sickens him the most is how he hacks away at them, one after another, ignoring his own pleas to stop. It's like he sees red in those dreams and loses all irrationality, even as he desperately tries to stop his sword.
It never gives way.
Again and again, he cuts and destroys. He kills, while he hears the words from his teacher that he should use the sword to protect his soul. He destroys, even after being taught by Shouyou that people should make peace rather than war. The cycle cruelly repeats itself, and after long enough Gintoki knows what lies at the end of his nightmares. The last part is the worst part of all, and he can never prepare himself despite knowing what he's going to see.
It's strange how blood decorates his path, while the ground surrounding his teacher's head chooses to stay clean and pure. Shouyou's decapitated head greets him every night, and every time the hole in his chest widens and consumes him. His knees buckle and fall on the hard ground, while he watches the head. Unlike Takasugi who lost his sanity and threw a huge fit; Sakamoto who looked anywhere else but at the ground, or Katsura who broke into tears the moment he saw him, Gintoki stares blankly at the head wordlessly.
He doesn't say anything; doesn't want to. All the demon wants to do is resume his killing spree, as if nothing happened.
Gintoki jolts awake and feels the cold sweat stuck on his neck. The moonlight streams through the windows and shines on the rest of him, enabling him to see his hands and futon. His hands lay open palmed before him, empty and clean. Clenching them into fists, he can almost feel the shape of the hilt and the red smeared all across his hands. It makes him nauseous. Eyes drooping again, he decides to ignore it and slowly lay back down to sleep. Even though he knows that he's going to continue his dreams, he's too tired to care.
Though, his head lands on something softer and thinner than his pillow.
Kagura's dreams usually revolve around her playing around outside with her umbrella and Sadaharu, but tonight it's different.
Tonight, she picks up the broken remnants that are her family.
"Kagura." Mother says as she cradles young Kagura in her arms. The warmth from her mother is there by her side and it feels ethereal. She opens her mouth to speak, to call her mother, but as she does the touch starts to feel faint.
In a panic, she looks up, only to see the form of her mother slowly fading away with that gentle smile on her face.
It startles him even more when he realizes that it feels like someone else's legs and quickly gets up to look at the sleeping form lying on the floor. The Yato is curled up into a fetal position, her eyes shut tight and snoozing away. Gintoki frowns, because he doesn't remember Kagura sleeping in his room tonight, but he settles down anyway.
It's a different family this time. A family that's just as messy as her last one. However, this family isn't broken at all, and it makes the Yato a little more happy. She's back as her current self again, standing in the living room of the Yorozuya home. Something's off though, seeing as how the living hall is completely empty of any furniture that was placed there. The calligraphy that says 'Sugar Content' is gone too, and her chest starts to hurt.
Kagura goes to open the door to Gin-chan's room, but it stays empty.
Everything is gone, and so are the people. The thought of this makes her want to scream and cry and wreck the whole place. But she stays, and she sits down at the spot where the Gin-chan's table used to be. She curls up into a ball, and lies her head on the cold, hard floor.
The covers of his futon rustle as he moves about, and he suddenly hears her whimper, "Gin-chan, don't you dare leave too…"
The perm head stills and listens for a few more moments. Taking the covers, he drapes it over her instead, while he lies down on side of the covers next to her. His leg lazily kicks away the futon and he rests his head on his arm, facing the girl. Kagura has a pained expression on her face that troubles him, so he decides to try to comfort her with words he hopes will reach her in her dreams.
He makes sure that his voice is loud enough to hear.
The door to the Yorozuya home slides open, and Kagura can't make out who it is. Her eyes are already flooded with tears; she can't stop crying. The figure walks up to her, picks her up quite easily. From her memory, Kagura knows whose hold this is, it's a familiar touch that reminds her of a mother a dream back. Rubbing her eyes furiously, she hears him speak softly but surely.
"Idiot. Who's leaving who?"
The Yato's expression softens up as if she heard his words. Gintoki can't help but smile and forget his own nightmares just for a second. Thinking that his job is done, he turns to the other side and closes his eyes when-
Thwack.
The back of Kagura's hand hits Gintoki's face and it wakes him up instantly.
"Mfffh—! Kauuuah!"
He's only greeted by her snoring. Kagura, on the other hand, grins with her eyes still closed and removes her hand. She rolls over to attach herself on his back like a bear a few more snores later. The perm heads wants to wake her up, though he decides against it. Instead, his arm reaches backwards, over his shoulder to pat her head and he goes back to sleep.
Gintoki feels like he might be able to escape that nightmare tonight.