The Perfect Girl,
By Jared Thail.
"Every day, do you know what I hear? I hear guys complaining that the girls they have been dating have been cheating behind their backs. I hear guys talking about their latest "fuck", and how big their breasts were. And I can't help but think what total, careless assholes they are- and how sorry I do feel for them. Because, whilst they are chasing after the girl's who resemble coal, they are forgetting to dig up the diamonds that have been buried deep in the soil, surrounded by trees and mud, and thick growth; they are guys who are too lazy to find that great girl, but have the balls to complain that there isn't a girl for them.
"So, if you're looking for the perfect girl in a bar, at a party, or even in the popularity groups- you're more than likely looking in the wrong place. Because the perfect girl is sitting in her room, or even by herself listening to the music that was released way before her time, she is also reading a novel from her seemingly infinite supply of books that take up space in her closet.
"She is the girl who sits in a cafe with a cup of coffee by her side and that damn book in her hand. So, When you see that "perfect" girl clutching a book with a heartbroken expression on her face, pounce, before someone else snatch's her up. Because I can guarantee you that she will paint your world, she will colour it, she will make it vibrant and carefree. Because we all know girls who read have one hell of an imagination, we know they're sensitive, we know that their love of literature comes bursting out at the most random of times, we also know that there will never be a dull moment, because when the strike of thick air arrives, she cuts it with a knife, saying something witty she read.
"Once you have that perfect girl in your arms, hug her, tell her you love her, and never let her go. Don't get angry at her when she suddenly wakes you up from a deep sleep, crying because her favourite character died, instead, get up and make her a cup of hot chocolate, hold her in your arms and smile down at her and think how beautiful she looks with her hair in a messy bun. Think how lucky you are.
"She loves watching movies, movies from A Walk to Remember, The Notebook to Cujo , Dawn of the Dead, to The Warriors and Robert DeNiro's hit movie Casino. She loves the movies that don't have a cliché ending, she is the girl that get's so engrossed in the movie that she doesn't realise you are calling her name.
"And when her birthday comes rolling on by, she is grateful for the badly written poetry you give her. She is so grateful she pins it to her bedroom wall, forgetting about the bear and the necklace you brought her. She reads it over and over, tears are in her eyes because she is so flattered that you would go to great lengths to make her day special.
"And when the special day rolls by and things get heated, you don't fuck her, because she is worth so much more than that. You make love to her. It's perfect, and even a little bit cliché and corny. Soft music from the one and only king of rock n roll (Elvis Presley) is playing on her purple iPod in the background from the meal she had prepared for you, and rain is hitting the tin roof. And, once again you think how lucky you are to have this beautiful, dazzling and idyllic girl in your arms. You're so happy you ask her to move in with you... she agrees! She actually agreed.
"And maybe, just maybe... if you're lucky she will say yes when you ask her to marry you. You know you don't want it to be cliché, so you wrack through every thought in your mind, trying desperately to figure out the perfect way to pop the question. And then, after one whole month of trying to figure it out, it hits you square in the face at 3 o'clock in the morning- she is once again crying, But this time, her nose is not stuck in some book again, it's a ring, a diamond ring that you had bought from the jewellers at an un-modest price. And lucky for you, this was just the climax in her life that she was hoping for.
"Date a girl like this, because you deserve it. Date a girl like this because you will never breathe a boring moment in your life again. Date a girl like this and not worry about what anybody else thinks. But if you can't, and this is not by your definition the true perfect girl, then you don't deserve her. You don't deserve the endless hours of true love, or the moments that leave your heart bursting with joy. You deserve to be alone because you can't see the true definition of beauty. Beauty lives inside the heart of the beholder, NOT how good she can get you off for a couple of hours."
I saw him enter the classroom, the first time in 6 weeks. His arms were bulging from the new mass of muscle, he was at least 6'4 now, and somehow- even more impossibly beautiful. He was wearing a white that just hugged his physique so delicately. He handed in three pieces of lined paper to the teacher- the teacher in question his mother.
"Nice of you too join us, now sit down, please so I can get this class settled" He sat in his usual seat, right next to me. And I could feel it. His smouldering heat that seemed to just radiate off of him. He felt as hot as a furnace- was he still sick?