~I don't know what was with me when I wrote this. It was 11:00 at night.
I shall describe my entire thought process prior to starting this: "ROTK's
coming out! EEEEEEEEEE!!! Hmmm, maybe I should re-write LOTR in poetry
format."
Do you see the connection? Me neither. Anyway, I did. Well, I started
to. I'm not done yet. Anyway, I had to severely stretch some things, the
rhythm is abhor-able and. Well, it's just strange. But I'm posting it
anyway! WOOT!!~
It's pretty boring to begin with, but it gets interesting and almost funny
later.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Sauron had some pretty rings
He gave some of them away
But the best he made in secret
And with him it would stay.
He planned to rule the world
His darkness swept the land
But Men and Elves fought back
And made a final stand
Isildur cut the pretty Ring
From the Dark Lord's finger
Without the Ring, he couldn't win
And Sauron's spirit didn't linger
Isildur kept the Ring
Though it should have been destroyed
But it betrayed him and he was killed
While the Ring sank into the River's void
Many years later the Ring was found
By Deagol and Sméagol
Sméagol killed his friend and stole the Ring
And eventually turned evil
Sméagol ran beneath a mountain
And Gollum he became
When Bilbo stole his Precious
Things'd never be the same
Bilbo gave the Ring to Frodo
And wandered off to Rivendell
Gandalf ordered Frodo that
About the Ring, nobody could he tell
Frodo went with Sam
To find a safe place for the Ring
'Cuz Sauron really wanted back
His pretty shiny thing
They met up with Merry and Pippin
And found Aragorn in Bree
Who was called naught but Strider
By those in the Prancing Pony
Strider led them through the wilds
All the way to Weathertop
Then a Ringwraith stabbed poor Frodo
So they ran and couldn't stop
They were chased by the Nazgul
Who used to be kings of Men
But the rings that Sauron gave
Thoroughly corrupted them
They met up with Glorfindel
(Though Peter says it's Arwen)
He/She tossed Frodo on a horse
And crossed the River Isen (A/N- okay, it's not the River Isen. But it
rhymed. You can
do nothing about it! Buahahaha!)
Elrond, Arwen's daddy
Treated Frodo's wound
As for the Ring, he said a council
Would be held very soon
Gandalf said he'd been a captive
And Saruman's no longer white
Now who would take the Ring?
Everyone began to fight
Frodo finally volunteered
Though he did not know the way
Gandalf said he would help;
Strider couldn't stay away
Legolas stood and said
This needed the help of an Elf
Gimli boldly announced
He'd keep an eye on Leggy himself
Boromir, a Gondor man
Also said he would assist
While Sam came from his hideout
Saying this was something he wouldn't miss
Merry and Pippin sneaked in
And said they were going too
Even though none of it
Would be an easy thing to do
Most hobbits weren't invited
But not much could Elrond say
He grumbled, rolled his eyes but said
They could all go anyway
Frodo wore his Mithril vest
Sam fretted over Rope
They started on their journey
Rather low on hope
They journeyed across lands
Where anything could be a spy
All the while wary
Of Sauron's looming eye
They tried to cross a mountain
But the weather beat them down
Gimli suggested Moria
And Gandalf agreed with a frown.
They walked to the steep walls
Of the Dwarven mine
And waited till the moon
Gave them a clear sign
They sat and they thought
And then they thought some more
Searching for the word
That would open the glowing door
Suddenly Gandalf gave a cry
'Mellon' he did shout
A creak, a groan, a puff of dust
The massive doors opened out
The Watcher in the Water
Firmly shooed them in
Then broke the great doors down
So they couldn't get out again
They journeyed through the dark
Dreaming of the light of day
They faithfully followed Gandalf
Though he was unsure of the way
Pippin dropped a rock down a hole
Yawning in the ground
Everybody glared at him
While drums in the deep did sound
Orcs came, they fought, Frodo was stabbed
But that really was okay
He was wearing his coat of Mithril
And was able to run away
In the midst of running
A Balrog they did find
Gandalf beat him down
But Gandalf also died
The others escaped Moria
And made it to Lorien's wood
They started to go through it
Though some didn't think they should
Galadriel was very nice
When they got to Lothlorien
And each dreaded the day
When they'd have to leave again
She gave them each a gift
Before they headed on their way
Some were so beautiful
They didn't know what to say
To Sam she gave a box of dirt
To make his green things grow
To Legolas she gave
Pretty arrows and a bow
Most were unimportant-
I mean, Gimli asked for hair
But Frodo's was very special
And should be treated with care
He got a pretty glass
"For when all other lights go out"
It offers slight foreshadowing
To his future spider bout
In Elven boats they went down
The River Anduin
Unsure as of yet
Of what they were getting in
When they stopped for camp
They were attacked by Uruk-Hai
Sam ran off with Frodo (A/N- not like that you sickos)
And Boromir got to die
Merry and Pippin were kidnapped
Even though Boromir tried his best
Frodo and Sam went off to Mordor,
Guaranteed little rest.
Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli
Went to save their kidnapped friends
And here the FOTR movie
Comes to an unsatisfying end.
I shall describe my entire thought process prior to starting this: "ROTK's
coming out! EEEEEEEEEE!!! Hmmm, maybe I should re-write LOTR in poetry
format."
Do you see the connection? Me neither. Anyway, I did. Well, I started
to. I'm not done yet. Anyway, I had to severely stretch some things, the
rhythm is abhor-able and. Well, it's just strange. But I'm posting it
anyway! WOOT!!~
It's pretty boring to begin with, but it gets interesting and almost funny
later.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Sauron had some pretty rings
He gave some of them away
But the best he made in secret
And with him it would stay.
He planned to rule the world
His darkness swept the land
But Men and Elves fought back
And made a final stand
Isildur cut the pretty Ring
From the Dark Lord's finger
Without the Ring, he couldn't win
And Sauron's spirit didn't linger
Isildur kept the Ring
Though it should have been destroyed
But it betrayed him and he was killed
While the Ring sank into the River's void
Many years later the Ring was found
By Deagol and Sméagol
Sméagol killed his friend and stole the Ring
And eventually turned evil
Sméagol ran beneath a mountain
And Gollum he became
When Bilbo stole his Precious
Things'd never be the same
Bilbo gave the Ring to Frodo
And wandered off to Rivendell
Gandalf ordered Frodo that
About the Ring, nobody could he tell
Frodo went with Sam
To find a safe place for the Ring
'Cuz Sauron really wanted back
His pretty shiny thing
They met up with Merry and Pippin
And found Aragorn in Bree
Who was called naught but Strider
By those in the Prancing Pony
Strider led them through the wilds
All the way to Weathertop
Then a Ringwraith stabbed poor Frodo
So they ran and couldn't stop
They were chased by the Nazgul
Who used to be kings of Men
But the rings that Sauron gave
Thoroughly corrupted them
They met up with Glorfindel
(Though Peter says it's Arwen)
He/She tossed Frodo on a horse
And crossed the River Isen (A/N- okay, it's not the River Isen. But it
rhymed. You can
do nothing about it! Buahahaha!)
Elrond, Arwen's daddy
Treated Frodo's wound
As for the Ring, he said a council
Would be held very soon
Gandalf said he'd been a captive
And Saruman's no longer white
Now who would take the Ring?
Everyone began to fight
Frodo finally volunteered
Though he did not know the way
Gandalf said he would help;
Strider couldn't stay away
Legolas stood and said
This needed the help of an Elf
Gimli boldly announced
He'd keep an eye on Leggy himself
Boromir, a Gondor man
Also said he would assist
While Sam came from his hideout
Saying this was something he wouldn't miss
Merry and Pippin sneaked in
And said they were going too
Even though none of it
Would be an easy thing to do
Most hobbits weren't invited
But not much could Elrond say
He grumbled, rolled his eyes but said
They could all go anyway
Frodo wore his Mithril vest
Sam fretted over Rope
They started on their journey
Rather low on hope
They journeyed across lands
Where anything could be a spy
All the while wary
Of Sauron's looming eye
They tried to cross a mountain
But the weather beat them down
Gimli suggested Moria
And Gandalf agreed with a frown.
They walked to the steep walls
Of the Dwarven mine
And waited till the moon
Gave them a clear sign
They sat and they thought
And then they thought some more
Searching for the word
That would open the glowing door
Suddenly Gandalf gave a cry
'Mellon' he did shout
A creak, a groan, a puff of dust
The massive doors opened out
The Watcher in the Water
Firmly shooed them in
Then broke the great doors down
So they couldn't get out again
They journeyed through the dark
Dreaming of the light of day
They faithfully followed Gandalf
Though he was unsure of the way
Pippin dropped a rock down a hole
Yawning in the ground
Everybody glared at him
While drums in the deep did sound
Orcs came, they fought, Frodo was stabbed
But that really was okay
He was wearing his coat of Mithril
And was able to run away
In the midst of running
A Balrog they did find
Gandalf beat him down
But Gandalf also died
The others escaped Moria
And made it to Lorien's wood
They started to go through it
Though some didn't think they should
Galadriel was very nice
When they got to Lothlorien
And each dreaded the day
When they'd have to leave again
She gave them each a gift
Before they headed on their way
Some were so beautiful
They didn't know what to say
To Sam she gave a box of dirt
To make his green things grow
To Legolas she gave
Pretty arrows and a bow
Most were unimportant-
I mean, Gimli asked for hair
But Frodo's was very special
And should be treated with care
He got a pretty glass
"For when all other lights go out"
It offers slight foreshadowing
To his future spider bout
In Elven boats they went down
The River Anduin
Unsure as of yet
Of what they were getting in
When they stopped for camp
They were attacked by Uruk-Hai
Sam ran off with Frodo (A/N- not like that you sickos)
And Boromir got to die
Merry and Pippin were kidnapped
Even though Boromir tried his best
Frodo and Sam went off to Mordor,
Guaranteed little rest.
Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli
Went to save their kidnapped friends
And here the FOTR movie
Comes to an unsatisfying end.