Summary: Natsu and Lucy are back from a job. Frustrated with Lucy's complaining, Natsu wishes to challenge Gray. But why are Gray and Sting fighting and what does it have to do with him? Is Natsu really as oblivious as they think? How far will Sting and Gray go to find out what the fire mage is hiding? Gray x Sting and Natsu x Rogue. Rare pairings - Humour and Slight Crack.
Rated M for content in later chapters.
Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail; if I did, the consequences would be unimaginable.
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- An Unexpected Fight -
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At Fairy Tail
Imagine a typical scene inside the guild hall at late afternoon, although a very hot and sticky one at that. Recent hot weather had incapacitated most of the members of the guild; meaning that they were just taking a relaxing day off inside the deliciously air conditioned interior. Currently, Mirajane was happily serving ice-cold drinks while being ogled by Macao and Wakaba. Cana was slumped over in drunken stupor with Erza shouting incomprehensible things in her ear to try and rouse her. But everyone took the odd glance at the two mages who were currently engaged in a heated argument.
"Natsu! You're too destructive! I can't believe we didn't get paid," Lucy whined.
"So? We got to bash those trolls' heads in. Isn't that good enough?" Natsu countered with his own twisted logic.
"I have rent to pay you know!"
"Oh? Well then maybe you'd have reason complain if it weren't for your own cow destroying the mayor's office," he retorted. Lucy's head dropped and she was silent in resignation, for this was completely true.
"Mooo! How dare you look at Lucy-san's nice body like that!" Happy impersonated. Natsu laughed and high-fived his best friend.
"THAT WASN'T MY FAULT!" Lucy screamed in retalliation, her eye twitching manically.
"Maybe you should whip him," Happy suggested with a dark smile.
"He'd just enjoy that..." she muttered, "I tried it once..." The last part was barely audible.
Natsu then put a hand on Lucy's shoulder and patted her in a manly manner. This served only to infuriate Lucy more. "The point is not to worry about it."
Lucy's head was now filled with murderous thoughts about how she would punish her perverted spirits and her pink-haired idiot of a best friend. "WHY SHOULDN'T I WORRY ABOUT IT?" She stomped her foot on the ground.
Natsu just sighed as he watched steam literally pour out of Lucy's ears. She could not be helped. Suddenly, a high-pitched voice snapped him out of his thoughts.
"Gray-sama!" Juvia called out, "Juvia made a drink for you." She held out a suspicious looking red cocktail. Little did she know, Mirajane had already swapped the vial of love potion she had used with water. "Oh where's my precious Gray-sama?" she cried. Juvia made this drink specially for you Juvia thought while sniffling.
Gray... hmm, a good fight with Gray will help me forget about Lucy, well at least until that...
"Alright! I'm all fired up!" he shouted and shot out of the guild doors in search of the ice mage.
"Natsu where the hell do you think you're going?" Lucy demanded but found that she was speaking to—and clutching at—thin air.
Elsewhere
"Droopy Eyes!"
"Pointy Eyes!"
"I love Natsu-san way more than you! All you do is fight him."
"Yeah but we grew up together. He barely knows you."
As you've probably guessed by now Sting and Gray were fighting, as unusual as that may seem. Currently the two were rolling on the floor trying to pin each other with one or the other throwing the odd punch. Sting flipped their position so that he was on top, attempting to pin Gray's hands.
"That may be so but I've been his biggest fan for years. You've had plenty of chances to confess but you're too much of a coward," Sting accused.
"Laser Breath Bastard!" Gray kneed Sting in the gut hard enough so that he was winded and rolled off.
"Perverted Ice Stripper..." Sting breathed while clenching his stomach.
"Oiiiiiiiiiiiii! GRAY!" Natsu yelled while scrambling to Gray's and Sting's position by the river. His rapid advance went well ovserved, since he carried with him a comical dust cloud. Gray leapt to his feet at seeing the object of his affection getting closer.
"Gray, I've been looking all over for you," Natsu managed to get out between sharp intakes of breath. Sting was seething with jealousy at this; Natsu hadn't even noticed him yet. "I wanted to fight you..."
Gray took Natsu's hand, caressing it and smiling gratefully. "Aww that's so sweet of you." Sting was not about to watch his love rival flirt with his Natsu right in front of his eyes. He got to his feet and kicked the ice mage away from Natsu.
"Sting! I didn't know you were here. Do you want to fight me? Wait, were you and Gray fighting? Without me?" Natsu groaned, "But I was so bored..."
"Natsu-san if you're bored then come have dinner with me," Sting offered. Gray growled and shoved the blonde aside whilst still recovering from the sidekick.
"Don't go with him Flame Brain, I know your favourite restaurant..." Gray countered Sting's offer.
Natsu froze for a moment while Sting and Gray watched on with anxious expectancy. Which one would he choose? Natsu looked from right to left glancing at the two mages before him. Gray's was dressed in his usual attire aka absent of any clothing except for a pair of shorts while Sting was wearing summer clothing which consisted of an open shirt and cargo trousers. It was apparent that both of the mages were very much dishevelled from their recent scuffle.
Finally, Natsu decided to grace them with an answer, "I can't," he blushed a deep shade of crimson, "I've got plans for tonight," he said bashfully, rubbing the back of his neck subconsciously.
"WHAT?" Sting and Gray exclaimed in unison.
However before they could get answer out of the fire mage he had taken off down the riverside path.
"Wh-what? Who could it be?" Sting sputtered.
"It's probably Lucy or Lisanna," Gray grumbled, "You know what I think we should do?" he asked tantalizingly.
"Follow him." Sting grinned deviously.
"How did you know?" Gray questioned sincerely but Sting just shrugged. Maybe we just think alike Gray thought. "Anyway, first we need some kind of disguise and I know the perfect person for the job..."
Later
"So, you've come to learn Transformation Magic?" Mirajane drawled while wiping down the bar surface, "and why may I ask?"
The silence hung in the air for a long moment with the only thing accompanying Gray and Sting in their precarious search for an answer being the obnoxious squeaking of Mirajane's cloth polishing the wood.
Eventually it gave way... only to Gray's complete disregard of the barmaid's intelligence and sheer curiosity...
"Erm, that's not important," Gray evaded and blushed a little. Of course, this was Mirajane and his odd behaviour did not go unnoticed.
"I think it is... Gray Fullbuster and Sting Eucliffe – the master of Sabertooth no less - 'absolutely must' learn transformation magic before the evening. Just what are you two up to?"
Sting coughed, "Please don't tell anyone. Gray and I have to follow Natsu-san since he's going on a date tonight and we want to know who it is," he begged the demon. Sting you idiot! Gray thought, soon everyone's going to know.
"Fine. I won't tell anyone."
Gray breathed out a sigh of relief.
"On one condition. You must report everything to me and only me otherwise I will dish out punishment as I see fit. Any objections?"
Gray and Sting both gulped and shook their heads.
"Okay then!" Suddenly they were in a classroom. How? Mirajane stood at a blackboard with a pointer as she began to explain the basics of the magic while Sting and Gray took their seats at adjacent desks.
"This shouldn't be too hard since Natsu got it on his first go when he transformed into Lucy." Mirajane smiled at the memory, "Moving on. I believe that you should start with looking into each others' eyes."
They both looked at her with evident disbelief, "What? Why?" they stuttered.
"You need to build up a mental image of someone before you can transform in to them; it's easier to do so when that person is right in front of you." She showed no sympathy for the boys' awkward predicament.
Swallowing their pride, they turned to each other and stared. Sting began to loose himself in the deep blue pools that were Gray's eyes. Wait, what am I thinking? The only man's eyes I should be staring into are Natsu-san's! Gray was also having a similar problem as he noticed just how great Sting's icy blue eyes were. They were just like Natsu's only sharper, sexier even. They had not realised that several minutes had passed.
"Ahem! I hate to ruin the moment but you should try transforming now," Mirajane's suggestion snapped them out of their daze. The two students built up their magic power and focused on the image of each other they had memorised before releasing it... with no result.
"Damn it!" they both cursed.
"Ooh I have an idea..." Mirajane was beginning to look quite devious, "You'll have to take off more clothes to get a better image of the other's body." Surprisingly, Gray had found all of his discarded clothes at some point.
"You can't be serious!" Sting protested.
"Oh but I am..." she tittered. The two students were actually really desperate so they complied with Mirajane's creepy proposal. Although he was supposedly forced to look, Gray couldn't help but admire the blonde's well toned body and perfect abs. Why do I feel this way about Sting of all people? Damn it I am not a pervert! I will admit it though I wouldn't mind...
"AH!" he cried out.
"What's the matter?" Sting asked and turned Gray's face towards his, "You look all hot and flustered. Is it the weather?" The increased proximity of the Dragon slayer's face only served to augment the growing embarrassment that the ice mage conveyed.
"Err, no." He shook his head, "But I think I can manage the technique now."
"Yeah me too." They once again focused on the mental image, although the image this time was a lot more intimate. Suddenly, they both transformed. It was a success... although they both became very flustered by looking at someone else wearing their own undressed figure.
"Yay!" cheered Mirajane, "Now that you know how to transform you just need to go and change into a random person from the streets." She said this without a hint of shame.
Outside Natsu's House
It was now dark out and the sound of cicadas could be heard which somehow amplified the effect of the sweltering heatwave that had recently hit Magnolia. Sting and Gray were crouching in a bush outside Natsu's house trying to make as little sound as possible while they waited impatiently for the Dragon slayer's emergence.
"Hey, won't Natsu be able to smell us?" Gray whispered.
"Actually Mirajane gave us this scent suppressor before we left. Looks like she's planned to stalk a dragon slayer before," Sting replied and took out a narrow test tube of clear liquid before releasing the rubber stopper. Sparkles entered the air and the Dragon slayer sniffed. "Looks like it works." Why am I missing Gray's scent already?
Sting's thoughts were interrupted when he immediately turned his attention to the sound of Natsu's door creaking open. Said fire mage poked his head round the frame and then scurried out towards an awaiting shadowy figure situated further down the path.
Gray nudged Sting in the side, "Who is it?"
"I can't see that far. Or smell. The suppressor works both ways."
"We have to follow them, don't get too close until we're back in town." The two swatted branches out of their way as they stood from cover. Gray had chosen the appearance of a short chestnut haired woman with bright green eyes and wore a red dress. Sting on the other hand was a tall, chubby woman with curly black hair and circular rimmed glasses. They had chosen people whom they thought to be inconspicuous and simply looked like they were just two residents on a girls' night out.
Magnolia
The stalking pair were now beginning to get frustrated since no matter how leisurely Natsu and his mystery date walked, they could not catch a glimpse of the person's face. Every single time they got closer, someone would walk into their line of sight or the two would pull each other off into a side street. Gray was particularly bothered as the heat was really getting to him and he struggled to suppress his stripping habit. The 'woman' sighed and took to fanning 'herself' with 'her' hand.
Sting then tapped 'her' on the shoulder and pointed to the couple who they were following. They had stopped outside a rather fancy looking restaurant on a terraced block and began to march inside. The tall 'woman' then turned to 'her' shorter companion in a silent request of approval. It was granted and the duo entered the establishment.
Unfortunately there was a queue just inside the entrance. Sting tapped his foot impatiently as Natsu and his date had already been shuttled off to a booth at the back. At last, they were at the front of the queue however the two couldn't possibly have anticipated what was about to happen.
"You two have a lot of nerve showing your faces around here," snarled the skinny waiter. At once all of the staff were alternating between doing their duties and sneaking vicious glares at Sting and Gray.
"I don't understand..." Gray was terrified. Not by the waiter but at causing a scene.
"How could you not understand? The staff were traumatized. I had to get therapy!" The man was desperately suppressing his voice level but he was clearly livid. Just what had these two women done? Why of all people to disguise themselves as had they chosen two... Gray didn't really know how to describe them because the waiter had still not uttered the ultimate crime which they had supposedly committed.
Sting did the only thing he could think of doing. He transformed into one of the lesser known female members of Sabertooth (he did not have the skill to transform clothes and make-up). He then whispered in the waiter's ear, "We're actually mages from Sabertooth tracking a criminal who frequents this restaurant." He changed back after saying this.
The confused man made a silent expression of realisation before leading the two 'women' to the back where the private booths were, giving the other waiters a look which told them to relax.
"This table is normally reserved but we don't want a criminal doing who knows what in our midst. Sorry about before," he explained, "We all thought you were..." He shuddered and did not finish his sentence.
Gray and Sting took their seats as another waiter brought them some complimentary wine. This helped to ease their frustration slightly at again failing to see who Natsu's mystery date was. Whoever it was must have left for the restroom during that whole incident, meaning that the two stalkers had missed their best opportunity. Sting was even more annoyed when he discovered that the booth they were seated at was adjacent Natsu's and there was a divider blocking the view. At least they'd be able to hear the voice.
Gray had to admit that the restaurant was quite nice. Romantic even; especially with the candles and wine. He thought that he would definitely be coming back here another time. He was snapped out of his romantic thoughts when Sting suggested an idea.
"Hey, I'm going to pretend to go to the toilet and I'll finally be able to see who this person is."
"Great idea!" Gray cheered.
With Sting's absence, Gray was starting to feel a little awkward from the silence and the suspense of finally finding out who Natsu had been dating behind everyone's backs. To be honest with himself, he didn't really care that he couldn't have Natsu any more; he was merely curious and would probably tease the hell out of the idiot later. It was almost as if Gray had feelings for someone else... weird as it may seem. He lazily chewed on some of his food and took another sip of wine. He was beginning to feel a little tipsy as he could tell from the blurring of his peripheral vision and the gentle swaying sensation.
Gray noticed movement in the corner of his eye and twisted his head to see Sting emerging from the door with very wide eyes. He fidgeted in his seat a little as he waited for Sting to sit and explain.
"It's, it's... Rogue..."
Gray gasped and tried not to spit out his mouthful of expensive wine. "You're kidding right?" Sting just shook his head theatrically.
Natsu... rowdy, rambunctious, hyper. These were all words one would use to describe the fire Dragon slayer of Fairy Tail. Rogue on the other hand... quiet, reserved, withdrawn. They just didn't fit! More importantly, the question which had gone unasked as of yet: since when did Natsu start dating guys? And guys like Rogue!? The universe would surely cave in on itself at any moment... or it would turn out to all be the fruit of some elaborate prank devised by only the most childish of minds.
After the initial shock died down, the two eavesdroppers decided to finish the meal and enjoy each others' company. They were currently tucking into their dessert which was a simple bowl of vanilla ice cream that the waiter had suggested when they overheard a conversation from the booth next to them.
"So we finally got our date, right Natsu-chan?"
"Hey! Don't call me that! But you're right, it's been so difficult lately what with Lucy always forcing me to go on jobs and Gray and Sting fighting over me."
"Ha! They're so clueless, pinky." Oddly enough Natsu did not protest this nickname. "So do you still have that King's costume that you stole?"
"I didn't know you liked it that much..." Natsu teased.
"How could I not? You looked so adorable..."
"I also have the ropes and candles you asked for," Natsu stated bluntly while the eavesdropping guys' jaws dropped. "And... I stole Lucy's whip!" he giggled. Yes, Natsu giggled.
"Oh, Natsu you're making it so hard for me to resist..."
"Then don't." With that, Natsu tugged on Rogue's hand and ran straight out of the restaurant, throwing a few thousand jewels at the table.
Gray was in awe of the scene he had just witnessed and the words that Natsu had spoken. He was still trying to piece together his shattered world when he felt a hard elbow nudge him in the arm.
"We have to follow them a bit more, you know we have to get something back for Mirajane-san." Sting said this while taking out a camera and getting to his feet. The two split the bill and left in search of Natsu and Rogue.
It didn't take too long; Sting spotted the odd couple in a back alley and gestured for Gray and him to hide. Sting ever so slowly pulled out the camera which Mirajane had instructed them to use. The first photo: Rogue pushing Natsu roughly against the wall, mouths fully locked and fighting for dominance. The second photo: Natsu's hand snaking its way up Rogue's back as they continued to make out, grinding against one another all the while. The situation was quickly escalating, but before something obscene might happen... The third photo: The two leave the alleyway. Sting quickly pulled Gray behind a wheely bin, narrowly avoiding detection as the couple left.
Now that they were in the clear, the men finally changed back to their normal appearances save for the fact that they were wearing female attire and make-up. Sting didn't really mind, Gray had already lost the dress. Wait a minute? Sting had some how pulled Gray on top of him and the ice mage was breathing heavily at almost having been caught. Sting relished the sight before his eyes, he'd given up on his crush on Natsu hours ago... and, well, he couldn't deny that Gray really was something.
Gray surprised the Dragon slayer by speaking first, "Hey are you upset over Natsu?"
Sting hesitated as he contemplated his response. Gray watched his eyes closely for any signs of hurt, betrayal or frustration, yet remarkably found none. Finally, Sting came to a decision, "Actually no, I think I've found the right person for me now," he said, and the two just stared into each others' eyes for a long time before Gray spoke again.
"Yeah, me too." At hearing this, the blonde knew exactly who the ice mage above him was talking about and decided to place his hand on Gray's cheek lovingly. Gray didn't push the hand away, he'd been wanting to do this since Mirajane's lesson.
"Hey, we don't have any proper clothes and Lucy's apartment is nearby," the ice mage suggested, offering an arm to hoist up the Dragon slayer beneath him.
Lucy's Apartment
Lucy hummed happily as she balanced precariously along the river on her way home with Plue by her feet. She had finally calmed down after going to a girls' only meal at a nearby sushi bar where they gossiped about this and that. The only downside was the constant dirty looks Juvia gave her whenever she spoke Gray's name. When she eventually reached her door she turned the key, got inside and... all but collapsed on the floor.
"Kyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!" Her scream could be heard across Magnolia. Two naked men were lying sprawled out on her bed, the evidence of what they'd been up to all too clear. In her apartment and on her bed no less. She blushed heavily and took a full minute to recover.
"Pun puuuuuuuuuun!" Plue contributed.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" she screamed in Sting's and Gray's ears. She covered her eyes with a hand but peaked through. It was her house. I do what I want! She thought.Gray groaned as he slowly woke, stretching his arms out and then nudging Sting awake too. Lucy took a few steps back.
"It was really hot and we had no clothes," he stated with a blank expression.
"What do you take me for?" she growled, her voice becoming dangerously low as she strode towards her prey, cracking her knuckles.
Sting finally spoke, holding out a hand to stop Lucy. "Wait, we can make it up to you!"
"How?" Sting handed her the three photos that they had taken of Natsu and Rogue. She gasped at first and then began chuckling as she was surrounded by a dark aura. "Give these to Mirajane-san first thing in the morning." Her aura only became darker at hearing this. Revenge would be hers...
Fairy Tail, Morning
Natsu slowly pushed the solid oak doors of the guildhall open and limped inside. Damn it but Rogue didn't go easy on me. It was odd, Fairy Tail was usually loud enough to drown out any noise but this morning it was deathly quiet. Are people looking at me? He wanted to go and ask Mirajane what was going on but before he could he heard Lucy shout an order.
"Get him!" she shouted and he was advanced on by Lucy, Erza, Mirajane, Lisanna, Wendy, Levy, Gajeel and Loke; with Erza and Lucy leading the attack. The red-haired knight pointed a very sharp looking sword at the unsuspecting dragon slayer.
"Tie him up!" she commanded. The girls did just that.
"Spill the beans Natsu or something else will be spilling." She pressed the sword tighter to his throat to drive home her threat.
"What are you talking about?" he spat.
"Rogue Cheney," she teased, sending Natsu into a mental breakdown.
"Wh-what? H-how did you find out?" he stammered. Mirajane then took this opportunity to approach him, holding out the three photos. "Who took these? Who was stalking me?"
"Why would I reveal my sources when I can just use this incident to blackmail them later." She risked a quick, challenging look at Sting and Gray who had been relaxing on the sidelines. The life left their eyes at hearing this and what she said next made them even more afraid. "They already deserve punishment for consorting with someone else before me." She then took up an innocent smile again; "but that can wait for another day. Right now... Natsu. Explain."
The fire mage swallowed his pride as he decided to tell his closest friends his story. "Do you remember the second night of the Daimatou Enbu? When I attacked the Sabertooth residence?" Everyone nodded. "Well it turns out that at the time Rogue was not happy with the way Sabertooth was being run, he thought they lacked comradeship and was upset when Yukino was humiliated and kicked out. Well, after I left Rogue actually went after me and well..."
"Spare us the details," Gajeel scoffed.
"No, Don't!" Levy and Loke protested.
"Ahem!" Natsu coughed; "We've been secretly seeing each other for over a month now."
Outside the guildhall Rogue pulled his collar tighter around his neck so as to not let the sun touch his skin. It really was difficult trying to stay untanned in this weather. He paused before entering the guild. What harm could it possibly do? It's not like anyone know about me and Natsu, we even took the extra incentive to arrive separately. Upon entering, the shadow dragon slayer was greeted with his lover tied up to one of the columns. Natsu... tied up. He fainted as memories of last night resurfaced (although mostly due to heatstroke.)
"Oi! Rogue!" Natsu shouted, tugging at his bindings. "Release me!" Thankfully, Erza decided to cut the ropes. She was after all satisfied with Natsu's explanation. The fire mage ran over to his boyfriend who was collapsed on the floor helplessly. Natsu shook him a little and waited for his eyes to open.
"Natsu!" he whispered; Natsu wore a stern expression.
"They know," the fire mage informed.
"But how?"
It was at this point that Happy finally decided to make his presence known. "Gray and Sting took the photos. They liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiike each other too," Happy teased. The blue exceed, as you've probably guessed, overheard their conversation with Mirajane.
Natsu lifted Rogue up from the floor and pulled him towards where Sting and Gray were sat.
"You're dead, Droopy Eyes!"
"Right back atcha, Flame for Brains."
It could not be said that it wasn't an unexpected fight when Rogue and Natsu teamed up against Sting and Gray and commenced battle. Nor could it have been anticipated that they would transform into each other to do impersonations. However this was Fairy Tail. Nothing should be expected. It was just wrong to hold expectations. Or responsibility. Or accountability.
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- The End -
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- Update: Not the end, continued in drabbles with subplot -
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The reasons why I wrote is not enough shounen ai in Fairy Tail fanfic and I just had to write these crack pairings. Hopefully I'm doing this right, I don't even know... There is also a lack of crack pairings in general.