A/N - The story of this one-shot can be summed up in one word: boredom. Thanks to the songs The Lucky One by Taylor Swift and Kiss Me Slowly by Parachute. Hope you like it!
Also, this is set pre-season 1 and has nothing whatsoever to do with the books (which I have never read). I only posted it in the book part because apparently the TV fics are also being posted here.
Disclaimer - I don't own Gossip Girl.
Hard but beautiful, detached and shining lights glimmered in and out of focus, as the fading sun cast an orange glow on the city skyline. New York City had always been a million shining lights and solid, concrete buildings that had witnessed time come and go, as nothing changed but the people who walked the streets. Flashes of color and a multitude of faces, a city bursting with life, and the inevitable noises that never ceased. Car horns honking, people talking, music coming from shops and street musicians, the calls of street vendors. It was a city that never stopped, and the lights never went out.
A beautifully decorated penthouse that inevitably belonged to the rich and wealthy was only one more shining light among millions, an apartment that is of any noise but crying and filled with broken hearts that time had not yet come to heal. The screaming was over, and all that was left was the air, heavy with realizations and angry words. The storm had passed, and all that remained was a door shut with force and a marriage broken.
Blair Waldorf's ears picked up the sounds of her mother's muffled crying – despite the purposefully loud music she'd put on – and if she focused hard enough, she could also hear her father's footsteps as he paced the hallway outside. At that moment, she didn't want to think or hear anything, she just wanted to go to sleep and wake up when her parents weren't fighting and her best friend wasn't in some boarding school far away.
But she couldn't do that, and it was nighttime now. All the distractions that kept her sane during the day were gone, and she was stuck in her prison where not even the music could drown out her thoughts. As she paced around her room she noticed the pictures in their expensive, silver frames. Photographs were all over the house and had always been, but now the brunette's eyes were drawn to them. Occasionally, Dorota had tried to bring order to the chaos of Blair's room, but she had never really messed with the photographs so that Blair had never had occasion to notice them.
Now, she saw that most of them included a man, a woman, and a smiling little girl from the ages of three to 6. She let her mind rewind the years; back to everything she knew when she was younger, more innocent. A little brown-haired girl smiling on a dusty country road, when the days were long and the world was small. Everything was simpler then, her parents were perfect and she felt like a princess in the dresses her mother designed. It was an amazing contrast to what her life was like now.
There was never time for anything; the world was complicated. Her best friend had abandoned her and gone off to boarding school without telling her. Sometimes she thought her parents were more messed up than she was; and no matter what, she could never be good enough to please her mother. There was the reputation she needed to protect, and the words that came out of her mouth were either lies or half-truths. She lived for the nights she couldn't remember and the drinks that made everything simpler. But no matter how many she downed, the only things she didn't forget were the ones she needed to the most.
A Manhattan princess, the lights of the city she called home glittering on outside, and a heart that was broken by the people she called "parents". Her family life was in shambles, her best friend was gone, and now she was all alone. Isn't that how it always goes? Everyone leaves and all she is left with are expensive dresses and purses, a last name that means she'll have to wake up the next day and pretend everything is fine, and a house as empty of sound as her heart is of friends.
All around her there were people that she knew would give anything to have her life; to have her money, beauty, clothes and social status. They told her how lucky she was to lead the life she led but sitting in her bedroom with only her thoughts to keep her company, sometimes distracted by her mother's crying in the other room, she couldn't understand.
She didn't feel lucky, she felt hurt and used, and completely and utterly alone. And she asked herself one question over and over: What's the use of being pretty when all it gets you is heartbreak? She could tear up as many pictures as she wanted, but it would never be enough to fill up the void she had in her heart.
Maybe when she was younger it was different. But now, her reality could be summed up in one simple, heartbreaking realization. No one stayed, and everyone left.
A/N - Now that you've read this remember that reviews totally make my day!