A/N: Bella and Jacob are together in this fic, it's rated M for a reason. Okay so sure there's some language that isn't the best in the world but hey they're teenagers and he's a wolf so sure they'll swear some. And again with the teenager thing, they're hormonal so a few Lemony stuff will happen. I'm very much into the whole Bella should have chosen Jake idea because I love Jacob Black even though people say he's a dog. Isabella Swan in this fanfic is rather different to the Isabella Swan from the twilight books. I promise the chapters get longer.
Have you ever made a choice and believed with all your heart it to be the right one, but then had doubts and realised it was wrong? The simple truth is I have, I realised I loved my best friend, so much more than I ever should, but I tried to keep him from my life, from my mind, how I should have known it would never be that simple. I can't change things now can I? It's times like this when I really needed my friend Angela Weber, she'd understand on a simple love between human boys level, but still it was a close approximation of what I needed. Did I really want to change and lose my friends and my family? Or did I really want to stay human and lose the Cullen's? I loved Edward deeply, I really did, but I also loved Jacob just as much, possibly more. It was the beginning of senior year, the beginning of my final year of being Bella no matter what I chose. If I chose Edward I'd be a Cullen and a Vampire, but if I chose Jake I'd be a wolf girl, worrying about my wolf while he went away. There was a lot at stake for me to make the wrong choice; I had to be sure of what I was doing. Edward was constantly trying to make me choose human life, which I understood his argument about risking my soul, but I knew Jake would never force me to choose something I didn't want. Back in phoenix life was never this complicated, it's really times like this that make me wish I'd stayed away and just came for vacations with Charlie, I really should have gone to Jacksonville when Charlie had tried to send me when Edward had left, causing me to crumble and in a way lose my sanity.