I hate this town.

For as long as I know, I've been living by myself. Both of my parents were killed by bandits years ago. I've been toughing it out on the streets since then, occasionally freeloading at peoples' houses for a short time. Right now, I live in the guest room of a particularly friendly family, but I don't know how much longer they'll let me stay. Every day, I see people going about their business with an air of confidence and purpose around them. These people are on their way to a job they love, a family they care about, or even a place for them to enjoy solitude. Their lives are driven by work and the reward of self-satisfaction. The greater the work, the greater the achievement. Life was never about achievements like this for me, and it never will be. People will say that the purpose of their lives is to be successful, or to have a family, or just to be happy. I resent their views. I've never had such a definite goal in my life. I've always just gone with things as they came by, and living my life one day at a time. I don't think about my future. I don't want to think about my future. I don't have anywhere to go, or people to be with. Most people around my age go to high school… I guess it's to be expected for the family I live with to force me to start going to the same school their daughter goes to. Said daughter apparently still isn't back from her overseas trip and won't be back until tomorrow. Honestly, I couldn't care less about any of this crazy school shit. I just don't have anything better to do, and I really-

"BBQ pork bun!"

What the actual fuck. That effectively ruined my rant. I look around to find the person who said that, and sure enough, to my right, on the same long, winding road as me, stood a girl just slightly taller than me. She's wearing a red-collared uniform in contrast to my blue one.

"Do you…"

She spoke again, in a softer voice than before. It was a tender, heart-warming melody, very much like the sound of 1200 ELO noobs' bones shattering beneath my feet.

"…like this town?"

Her words came as an unexpected surprise to me. Who was she? How did she know what I was just thinking about?

"I do. I really, really do. There's many people here that I love, and lots of happy things to remember."

She answers her own questions with unbelievable thoughts that so strongly oppose my own. There was a confident glare in her eyes, with her small hands together by her chest. And yet, in that very confidence, her forward glare appeared to be somewhat unsteady, as if she were convincing herself with her own words.

"But no matter how much you want them to, the happy things don't last. They always go away. Nothing will stay the same forever."

"Then all you need to do is to find the next happy thing right?"

I reply almost instinctively, without hesitation. It felt like it was the natural thing to say, although I'm the last person who should be saying things like that. Her trance-like gaze vanishes instantly, as she turns to face me with widened eyes. It doesn't seem that she knew I was there. I can clearly see her face now that she was facing me. She has clear purple eyes that matched her long, purple hair. Her skin is very clear, though a bit pale.

"E-e-ehh?"

Suddenly, for some crazy reason, her face goes bright red and her eyes grow even larger. I can't say for sure, but it almost looks like they're slightly tearing up.

"Y-y-you...!"

Too preoccupied staring at her furiously glowing face, I fail to notice her hand being raised.

"PERVERT!11! !"

Ugh, what happened to me? I slowly open my eyes to the familiar cherry blossom trees swaying above me. Tentatively, I raise my hand up to feel my cheek to be met with a sharp sting. I don't know how long I was out for, but for that slap to still sting, that bitch must've really been bat-shit crazy. I still have no idea what I did wrong. I mean, if this was an anime, or a game, or whatever, saying something smooth like that would've made a great opening right? Right? How was I being a pervert in any sense of the word? Brushing myself off, I get up to my feet and continue down the path. I had originally left for school quite early, but seeing as there were still no other students on the path anymore, I was probably unconscious for so long that I'm now extremely late. It's to my understanding that typical students would start running at this point, but I still decide to walk to school just as slowly and leisurely as before. I'm in no rush. I doubt that I'm even going to live in this neighbourhood for much longer before I get kicked out of my free shelter again, and then I'll sleep in alleyways before finding another house, just like it always has been. I'm only going now because the family I've been living with is forcing me to. They keeping saying that a boy my age "ought to be outside and learning and making friends and enjoying life". I guess I conceded because I had nothing better to be doing anyway.

After several more minutes, I finally reach the school. As I suspected, no students were to be found outside. Everyone was probably in their classes already. Before me stood a large stone engraving of the school's name. League of Funbun Collegiate Institute, it read. That name gives me the chills somehow. Sighing loudly, I make my way towards the front doors.

I take in the grandness and the sheer aura of class that the school practically excretes as I leisurely stroll over a thin concrete path. Having been very much a hobo and a sunlight-hating NEET (Not in Education, Employment, or Training) for a significant portion of my life, I hadn't had the chance to see my share of breathtaking buildings. The school is extremely clean, without a trace of litter or vandalism throughout its property, with white walls that were polished to the point of sparkling. The grass seems to be freshly trimmed, with a deep, vibrant shade of a healthy green. And throughout the entire premises, there is an indescribably pleasant aroma that drifted through the air. Although, of course, no students are to be seen.

No, that's wrong. Peering into the far distance with my eyes squinted, I can see the form of a person apparently crouching at the edge of a flight of stairs with a long, dark object in his hands. He appears to be intensely concentrating on something. It must be well into morning classes at this point, and he doesn't look like he's late like me since he isn't going anywhere, so what could he be doing? I turn back to look at the front doors. I was nearly there already. Well, whatever, it isn't like I actually came here to learn right? It doesn't matter if I don't attend some classes. Nobody's going to kill me over it. I decide to change course and investigate the mysterious person crouched at the stairs.

Coming closer, I notice that the person was a girl with long, straight brown hair. She's wearing a peculiar and huge purple hat with stripes on it. I'm not much of a fashion guru so I can't comment. Substantially more important, though, is the fact that she's holding an outrageously large gun (by my standards, anyway). It may be one of those designed for longer ranged combat, a sniper type of weapon. However, as intimidating as it may as well be, the gun has a number of funny-looking circular lenses lined up. Now that I think about it, that gun itself looks more like a toy or cartoon than anything remotely real. The whole image, of this girl my age wearing that colourful hat, wielding a cartoonish gun, crouching quietly on the edge of a flight of stairs while wearing the same uniform as me was... was rather... quite...

Arousing.

No, no, that's not right. She is certainly pretty to say the least, and I didn't expect to find anyone like her this soon at this school, but even so, that... that's just wrong. I can't get ahead of myself, not now.

"How long are you going to stare like that at me for?"

She suddenly spoke, without even turning her eyes to face me for a second. I can feel my cheeks flushing. Now that I think about it, I'm already pretty much right beside her. I didn't even realize that I got this close so quickly. How long was I really staring at her for? How long did she know I was there for? What if the unfortunate events from winding path repeat themselves? I don't really think of myself as a pervert, but I guess she would actually have some decent proof if she were to accuse me now-

"Well, do what you want. Just don't do anything intrusive."

"E-eh no! I'm sorry, I was just... I..."

What am I doing? I don't even know who she is, and she sure as hell doesn't know who I am, so what's the point of being so nervous? I have to say something, right now, or it's going to get even more awkward.

"I... I... What are you doing here?!"

Well shit. I tried. She's here to go to school, obviously. Why else would she be wearing the same uniform as me?

"Mmm. Angel should be coming out anytime now. I'm going to take her out this time. I absolutely will."

What?... Angel's coming out? She's going to "take her out"?... I gulp as a sharp chill runs down my spine. What kind of person did I just find? Is this really a student? What if she's a hired assassin from Noxus disguised to be a student in order to eliminate a high-value target in this town? "Angel" must be some top-secret codename for an important government figure that they want dead. I've heard about Noxians before. Urgot himself was trolling some guys a while back, and he was fat&ugly. Fatter than anything I'd ever seen. To think that this girl right in front of me could be like him... oh sweet lord that can't be possible. She's not fat, not at all, nor ugly. Sure, I haven't seen what's under that uniform (as splendid as that would be), but she can't possibly be fat&ugly like Urgot... right? I don't get how all that fat would fit in there, though she does seem to be doing fine with other large things she keeps tucked under that shirt- A-aaah! What am I thinking...

Even if she's not Urgot in disguise, she could still be dangerous. The hat... the gun... the gun might be the most potent of models hidden in the deepest underground armories made to resemble a child's toy to cover for its devastating power, while the overly large hat must be there to store the heads of her victims! Tears of pure terror begin to appear in the corners of my widened eyes. What the hell have I done to deserve this?

"She's here!..."

Her sudden exclamation catches me off guard, causing me to fall backward onto my bottom. A heinous, sinister glare came over her eyes. I whimpered with fear. Looking in the direction she was aiming, I can make out the vague shape of a person standing far in the distance, on the opposite end of the school grounds. The person seems so far away.

"H-he's too far! You'll, you're gonna miss!"

As if she could hear my thoughts, the girl with the hat takes her eyes off her gun's scope and extends her arm, holding the gun forward with only one hand. It's like I challenged her to shoot such a far target without even aiming.

"Me? Miss? Not by a long shot!"

Her arm extended with confidence, she fires an enormous bullet from her gun, the gunshot resonating and echoing in the distance. The bullet moves with unparalleled speed, with such force that it appeared to create a rift through the space it shredded through. A car, no, a tank wouldn't be unable to withstand such force. The bullet rips through the air, travelling a distance of at least 500 meters in an instant. Even an amateur like me who has no experience with this type of thing can tell that the girl's aim was perfect. Even without using the scope on her gun, while holding the gun with a single hand, she managed a shot of such precision across such a distance!...

The bullet connects. A brilliant flash of light surges from Angel, blinding me despite how far away I was. The girl beside me shields her eyes, but I am too mesmerized by both the shock and vividness of the cascading golden light before me to care. The initial flash dissipating, I can make out the distinct shape of a perfect yellow circle surrounding Angel.

A nerve-splitting crash. Regaining my senses, I look over towards the school. The bullet had ricocheted from the aura around Angel and collided devastatingly with a column nearby, the force of the impact so powerful that the entire column crumbled down. From the girl's shooting to the column's destruction, the entire scene had lasted for barely a quarter of a second. The person that the girl just tried to kill... Angel... not only reacted to, but completely blocked the bullet with godlike reflexes-

"Tsk. Too slow."

The girl beside me spoke as she lowered her gun and began to turn away.

"Another wasted opportunity... such a shame."

She's leaving. After camping outside the school during class, firing a gun at someone, and destroying part of the school building, she's just walking away as if nothing really happened.

I can't let her leave.

"W-who are you?!"

I need to know. Is she really an assassin from Noxus?

"Eh?"

She turns her head around with her eyebrows raised in surprise. Apparently she managed to forget that I was there.

"My name is Caitlyn. I'm the leader of the- AAAAAHH!1!... Ow..."

My eyes. My eyes...

The same girl that I had suspected to be a deadly Noxian assassin just clumsily tripped with me still sitting on the ground right behind her. She's still wearing her school uniform with that overly short skirt. I-I... I can see everything! This feeling..! Is this what they call "the light at the end of the tunnel"?!

"C-cupcake pant-"

She grabs the back of her skirt and desperately covers herself with it. Interestingly, her face is almost redder than the purple-haired girl from this morning-

"ERASE EVERYTHING YOU SAW FROM YOUR MIND THIS INSTANT!"

Right before she beat me across the face with the back of her gun, I could feel something strange welling up inside of me. Just now, I felt like something was growing in my body. It was weird feeling, and yet it almost felt so familiar. Like I've felt such a feeling all my life. Unfortunately for me, I crash painfully into the wall before getting to contemplate any more. I black out after getting owned by a girl for the second time that day.

I wake up with the bright afternoon sun in my eyes. I wriggle my arms and legs to check if they're broken. Things seem to be going well so far. I try to stand. My back is still sore from crashing into the wall, but I think I'll be okay. Looking around, I still don't see any students outside. On the bright side, it doesn't seem like school is over yet. Better late than absent. I make my way to the front door again and I step inside silently. A cool breeze hits me as soon as I enter, the air conditioning system doing its work. The school's insides look much more modest and reserved than its extravagant exterior. There's a large bulletin board right in the middle of the foyer, with several long lists stuck to it. Since it's the first day, it's probably a list of the students in each class. I decide to look for my own name.

"Ah."

Halfway down the list, I see a Caitlyn in the second-year class 2-B. So she really does go to this school. There's still the possibility of her being an undercover type of assassin, so I can't let my guard down around her yet. Moving down the list, I spot my own name in the class right after Caitlyn's, 2-C. I go through the names of my classmates. Unsurprisingly, I don't know any of them.

With that, I head off into an adjacent hallway in search of class 2-C. I didn't see any clocks yet, so I still have no idea what time it is. Chances are, I'll end up interrupting my class before my teacher hesitantly introduces the late new student. I wonder what my classmates will think of me.

2-A... 2-B... Here it is. Class 2-C. A tall blue door looms in front of me, daring me to open it. I can hear a single voice speaking inside the room, probably the teacher. I really am going to have to interrupt his class. Well, there's no helping it I guess... I put my hand on the doorknob and take a deep breath.

"E-excuse me!"

I yelled as loudly as I could to get the class's attention using all my courage. I waited for their response. It's perfectly understandable for them to be surprised at my sudden intrusion-

"What was that? I think someone's outside, let me go check."

I forgot to open the door.

I feel the knob turning from the other side as the teacher pulls the door open, but since I had put my weight on my hand, I fall into the room face-first.

"You... aren't you the transfer student?"

"Umm... yes, yeah I am, thanks you."

The fuck am I saying.

"Alright class! The transfer student I mentioned this morning has finally decided to show up! Now, introduce yourself."

The teacher looks very unlike the image of a typical high school teacher that I envisioned. He is wearing a brown suit with a white button-up dress shirt underneath along with blue pants and very large brown boots. He has quite a long beard. He's also blue.

I look around and take in the sight of a classroom full of people my age for the first time in my life. They're all wearing uniforms with blue collars identical to my own, but beyond that, the people in this class are diverse, to say the least. Some of them are extremely large, while others are just my size. Many of them have different skin colours, and some of them don't have skin at all. They're all sitting on chairs with their desks and everything, but some of them... I just really wonder how they manage to do things. For fuck's sake, there's a big blue scorpion with his back legs on the chair and his front legs up on his desk, and it's trying to pick up a pencil with its claws, only to make it roll away repeatedly. There's also a tree growing on one of the chairs, but nobody seems to notice it, so I pretend that I didn't either.

"Hi, everyone..."

I can feel everyone's eyes on me. I'm the centre of attention. A person like me, who barely survives day to day life on the streets, has the spotlight in such a place.

"...I live just south of here, I moved in recently..."

I think back to all the things that happened to me today. I've had an anime-like encounter with a girl who knocked me out by slapping me and also called me a pervert, I found a potential Noxian assassin, I witnessed an attempted murder that resulted in the destruction of school property, and I even saw panties with cupcakes on them.

"...I still don't know this area very well, but I'm doing my best..."

In the past few hours, I had more exciting experiences than I've probably had in the rest of life.

"...I'm sorry for being this late, I... I got lost..."

Maybe... just maybe... going to this school might be...

"...My name is Veigar. Please take care of me."

...Fun.