Canonverse AU | FrancexEngland (Rusame and canadaxnetherlands if you squish.) Disclaimer: I don't own the characters
Summary: France get's suddenly sick and about to die. England even wanting the man to leave him can't deal with it, specially when he may have something to do with it. A friendship grows as something is not right. Will he survive or will England live with the guilt of a death?
Sick
He moves like magic.
Or so England thinks. He moves slowly, graciously, smoothly and with the precision of a charmer. He moves like one of his dear friends, - those that no one believes but he knows France saw one once and will make him admit it someday; - his fairies, but today he stumbled and limped like an old drunk.
He loathes that man, that country, that flirting annoying being but today France sits on his side quiet and thoughtful, just looking and smiling to everyone making him anxious.
A nervous worry fills his heart and mind and he looks at France noticing that his charm is still there and surely only a few incredibly perceptive ones will notice how bad the man actually looks. This makes England think of the Second World War, how France clenched his teeth in pain, shivered in fear and glared in determination but at the same time is very different and he swallows regretting having reminded such days, the only similarity is the thoughtful look and the pained blue eyes.
The ordinary events transpire on the meeting. Japan silently reads the mood and looks thoughtfully at France but suddenly is looking at China making England release a breath; at least he's acting normal. Russia and America are making a glare contest that he's sure is filled with perverted fantasies if they are in good terms and destruction promises if in bad terms and the rest keeps waiting for the meeting to end.
Germany looks at France for a moment and England tries to read France's face but its normal and Germany looks confused enough making England glad that France is not experiencing traumas again. They all have them; they just hide and give the strong cheek.
He hits himself for worrying for France-, No.
England is not worried for France; he's just worried for himself of course. If France is in need he will have to participate in something that he won't probably want to.
He is not also worried that people may realise it and take advantage of him, of course not, he just wants to be the first doing that!
And for those reasons and more he simply says to America sod off and walks to France who his saying his goodbyes from a flu sick Spain.
France walks slowly, carefully as if afraid of loosing a step and England gazes him worriedly while walking to him slowly. Green eyes narrow and he thinks how something is very wrong but the frog of course is trying to hide it… badly!
France groans in pain and shivers a bit before straighten himself and walk again a bit faster but still carefully and Canada approaches him making England hide and kneel behind the wall.
Okay, he was not hiding; he needed to lace his shoelaces… yes!
Canada said something and looked worried but France dismissed him waving his hand with a loud laugh and Canada walked away to Netherlands side murmuring something.
England kept peeking from his low place when a huge shadow appeared above him.
He shuddered knowing that shadow and looked up to meeting purple menacing, then a loud voice came from his side on the ground and he groaned. Shite.
''What'ya doing?'' America said crunched down to his level and both looked at him cornering him strangely.
These two together are almost worse as apart, almost!
''Nothing.'' England says and America follows Russia's line of vision.
England also looked at the spot nervously but realised that France was no longer there making him give a relieved laugh.
This until America stood and smirked, of course.
''Watching your invisible buddies again old man?''
England was about to rejoin but Russia giggled and shook his head. ''I believe he was following France.''
''WOW, he was stalking France? Why?'' America looked up with curious blue eyes and Russia shrugged his broad shoulders.
''Ask him.''
All the attentions turned to England again and he did what a good British gentleman does when he need; besides blaming it on the French frogs.
''It's time for my tea, excuse me Sirs and have a nice day.'' He stood bid goodbye and walked away a bit too quickly leaving two big countries conspiring against him. How lovely, he just dug his grave.
He looked everywhere but France was already out of the building so he went home rather dejected and concerned.
If he needed something or was feeling something important he would tell England first right? Bugger, that froggish wino bastard his hiding something important from him making him troubled.
.
France stumbled on his kitchen holding himself through walls and furnishings as his cloudy and blurry vision prevented him from standing properly.
He really doesn't understand what's wrong. His country is growing and thriving, his people are rather content and his health should be properly healed but no.
Suddenly he woke up feeling tired, confused and nauseated. Now his mobility is also affected and his hair started to fall in troublesome quantities. Only when this happened he became truly concerned, he really treasures his hair and when something is amiss with it, is the case to worry.
He sat on the couch and sighed. He had no hungry and the little food he did swallow automatically came out since the last morning. He was exhausted and afraid someone takes notice on that and takes advantage of his country or worse.
Part of being a nation is these paranoid feelings; Nations have no friends only enemies and border companions, it's rather lonely and sad for him because you can never bond properly with another nations and the humans you love, they die so quickly that only memories survive. If they endure time.
He wanted to go to his normal doctor but then his president would know and he would have to admit he's sick and he's not. He can't be because he has a date with England next week.
England just doesn't know it, yet.
He smirked but then groaned at the nausea that came and tried to stand and call Belgium; she would help and keep it shut.
Suddenly the room started gyrating and he fell unconscious on the ground.
.
Canada was worried. France was sick and was trying to hide it, as a big brother he's splendid but when it comes to take care of himself he's a wreck.
Canada rang the bell and no sound came from the dark house. He knocked and with a roll of eyes took his keys and opened the door.
All the lights were shut down and he quickly lightened them to look around. It seems France after all was fine and went somewhere…
He shrugged it off and decided to leave a note on the kitchen but when he stepped inside of the kitchen his breath caught and he run to the prone limp body on the ground.
''PAPA!'' Canada yelled kneeling not touching him but taking his phone out to call the urgencies.
Only after calming himself, call 911 and seeing how his slow breathing rhythm made his chest move brought him some relief. It was not normal for a nation come this sick when the country was doing fine.
He looked around placing a hand on France's cold face and with shaking hands called America and England. They would want to know.
.
France opened his eyes slowly and groggily flinching as bright light hit his eyelids.
He frowned and pressed his hand to his temples feeling the hand constricted by something. He opened his eyes quickly, suspiciously and glared at the tube stuck on his skin. Why there was a needle stuck on his hand?
He looked up to a white ceiling and white walls groaning and wondering why is he on a hospital before glaring at the sleeping Canadian on a chair next to his bed.
Great, now he was on a hospital and would make his little brother concerned…
He groaned again and felt his forehead feeling a sore lump from where he hit when fell then a grumpy British man ran and invaded his room.
''He's here?'' he asked rather puffy and red flushed and France smirked.
''Oh cher, don't invade my room like that or people will think we'll start another 100years war.'' He joked half heartedly and England glared at him.
''Don't joke with that and no, I was asking about America of course. Here he is!'' England looked around and turned to put an arm around a still sleepy Canada who was missing his bear for some reason and France raised one eyebrow.
''That's Canada.'' He smirked again and England coughed.
''Canada, I knew it. I came here looking for him! He has great business with the Queen!'' he said pompously and France smiled feeling rather tired.
A few seconds of silence passed between a glaring British and a smiling French and England sighed defeated, annoyed and truly concerned.
''How are you feeling?'' it felt like a frog coming out of his mouth. How fitting.
''Fine.'' He said without a beat and England frowned opening his mouth but the door swayed open bringing a loud American.
''DUDE! You are awake, you gave us a scare, man… Matt freaked out…'' he said placing the bear above the still sleeping Canadian who grabbed it instinctively without awakening.
''It was nothing, just an old man tension problems I bet.'' France smirked at America and England narrowed his eyes as America took his chance to talk, again. Brat.
''Have you talked with the doctor yet?'' he asked with a thoughtful face and France shook his head.
''I woke up when the rosbif came so no…'' He says looking at his legs which were paining him somehow and England followed his gaze.
''It will be nothing, less salt as Japan is doing right now and you'll be fine.'' America laughed but the smile France gave made England want to run from that door dragging the French and throw him to the river. It was a pained smile. He hated that smile.
Three days. France spent three full days on that white room as Canada worried and America laughed it off while England could see that America was worried himself.
England for his part could see the creeping fear on blue eyes when the doctor said to France that he didn't know what was happening.
England refused to leave his side ignoring French teases and other countries suspicions. After all, above a great enemy France was his only friend. Not that he will admit that to the frog.
.
England looked at America who was talking with a serious Russia and frowned. What are these two conspiring now? Then as if noticing him for the first time America called him.
''England, come here dude!'' he said and he walked to them with narrowed green eyes.
He was sure Russia was looking at his eyebrows, and for the wide smile, mentally plucking them but managed to keep a fierce glare.
''What?'' he snapped and America grabbed his shoulder.
''We don't know… '' he admitted rather embarrassed and Russia nodded looking down and he felt confused.
''Don't know what?'' he blinked and America bit his lip before sighing and running a hand through his hair.
''We tried to join our intelligences and medicine powers without the government to know and we did it but we still don't know what he has… We only know that he will die if he continues like this…'' he murmured with a sad look as Russia kept glaring at the ground and England shook his head.
''You bloody-, No! He's not… he…'' England looked at the door with lips pressed in a thin line and furrowed eyebrows.
He never considered a world without France, not really. He simply wished the man to stop bother him and appear on his house to molest when he feels like, he never wished him to… vanish, die.
He felt coldness surrounding him and he walked away from the hospital to think properly leaving a worried America being comforted by a solemn Russia and France with his long date friends Spain and Prussia.
England paid a visit to Japan.
Japan was a nice fellow to drink tea/sake with and think so he sat in front of him with a cup of tea pressed on his lips as Japan looked at him stoically.
''England-san.'' Japan murmured and he looked at him in confusion.
He was just reminding some fond moments with the frog and his eyes felt stinging but he refused to acknowledge that he may eventually …. Die.
''I believe it was a curse.'' He states and England blinks.
''What?'' he asks and Japan places his sake on the table looking straight into his eyes.
''Me and China were looking for possible causes for France's situation and it's the only conclusion we got to.'' He nods placing his hands on his lap and England looks down.
''A curse?'' he parrots and Japan nods.
''A strong country representation does not die like this; we both saw how nation's die. There's need a fight, a change of power and land or something stronger. The problem is not connected at all with his country and we are sure only magic is capable of such things.''
England nodded agreeing and swallowed cold tea. He stood three more hours with Japan, most of them in silence then he went to the hospital again.
This time France was alone.
England walked inside his room with cautious worried eyes and noticed how France's eyes were reddish before sitting on his side.
France ignored him on purpose and he sighed.
''I'm back…'' he murmured and France nodded closing his eyes.
''Why did you left?'' he murmured softly and England could see how troublesome was for him to talk.
He looked to the side and heard shifting. France touched his hair and pulled softly strands of hair that fell easily from his scalp making him gulp and tremble in anger, sadness and frustration for not being able of helping him.
''Ange… I'm vanishing….'' He murmured bordering an hysteric and pained tone and England looked at him with wide fearful eyes.
''No…'' he almost yelled and France started to cry holding his locks to his heart.
''I… I don't want to die….'' France sobbed and he grabbed his hand with tearful green eyes as their hands trembled together.
''I can't leave yet… not yet…'' France murmured and England's tears found his way through his cheeks and eyelashes making his vision blur.
''I don't want you to leave, frog….'' He opened his mouth in a silent cry and France grabbed his hand weakly as his mind ran crazily.
A sudden memory made him freeze as the French silently cried in front of him and he looked to the wall in astonishment.
France almost makes him crazy. Nothing is right when he's not there but nothing is right either when he's gone and it craves under England's skin how when he decided to appear he simply does the same he's done for years.
He proclaims his fake love and presses soft kisses on him making him grab his long hair and fall again for the same mistake.
This will change. He will make France simply go away from him life.
He can't bear to know he's not the only one, France fools around and England hates that because he doesn't… he can't… he just wants-.
He stepped on the circle and nodded to himself. He wants him to leave for good.
France can fool around with anyone expect him! He's a gentleman, he doesn't crave nor needs the French and it will be nice to have some peace for once.
He started murmuring the enchantment ignoring how the fairy started shaking his head and talking something about nations and humans.
Yes, France won't come to him again without him wanting. He will just leave him alone.
''Oh God…'' England's eyes widened and he felt nauseated.
France looked at him concerned as he dropped the French hand as if it burned and England made a pained guilty look before running away from the room leaving the French behind gazing the door with a sad look on blue gazed blue eyes.
.
England roams through his books and shelf quickly and frenetically.
His mouth clenched and he shook his head not wanting to believe that it was his fault. It couldn't be, he just wanted him to leave him alone for a while not forever!
He grabbed books as fairies and mythical creatures watched him silently and he turned to them.
''Help me dammit! Help me!'' he yelled making a few wince and a few saddened.
''Come on! We can't let him die!'' he yells and he re-reads the spell not understanding why it doesn't have an indication… just one.
He kneels yelling curses and shivering in anger and fear as the fairies come to him and light the words 'The truth shall set you free and the deal will be done…' without him to realise.
This was something they could not force though so they just shared sad looks as he stood grabbed his coat and bumped the door loudly.
He can't do a thing, there's nothing he can do to prevent France's death and he just wants to trade his death for his even not being able to.
.
England entered on the room and smiled at Seychelles who walked away with a sad smile.
He felt desperate, guilty and above all hopeless.
How could he do this to his friend, his enemy, his everything? Yes, he wanted to be the one destroying France but not with a disease, not with magic, not like this! It made him feel bitter and low.
With that he looked down feeling blue eyes gazing him while feeling lost he simply sat there with France listening the low tv murmuring some novel.
He never realised the idea of a world without France was so idiotic until now. He needed France, he needs him.
.
Four days and they shared only a few words. France's hoarse voice pushed him to talk but he felt so guilty that he could only mumble a few sentences before gritting his teeth and wanting to crawl into a hole and die.
America and Canada were talking about some food with England as he sat holding a newspaper but not really reading it and France murmured stopping the conversation for England's surprise.
''-can't I have England just for me for once?'' he asked and England frowned with a small smirk.
''Don't push frog…''
''But I'm dying….'' He said with a fake cough that soon turned real making America wince and Canada grab him.
''Yeah, yeah old man excuses…'' he murmured and France looked at him with a thoughtful look making him look at the piece of cloth covering his naked head.
''Is that a yes?''
''Yes…'' he said disturbed at the decline of his greatest enemy and hoping not to feel his cold hand again. He was not sure if he was not going to choke on his tears this time.
The younger nations left and France gave a small real smile. It was the first one he gave since he entered on that room days ago and he frowned worried.
''Remember when we thought the world was about to vanish?''
''Don't remind me that… I thought…'' England started but trailed catching himself with wide eyes and a dry mouth.
France silently waited and he grabbed the paper on his hands tightly before looking up with slightly desperate and lost green eyes.
''I thought I would lose you like right now…'' he murmured ashamed and confused about how truth the sentence was and France smiled.
''I thought the same… not being able to annoy you is hell cher…'' he joked and England smiled feeling some of the tension he was holding inside leaving.
''Yes, it's indeed troublesome…''
''I don't want to d-,…'' France starts and he snaps throwing the newspaper to the ground and shifting to the bed.
''Shut up…''
''But I have so many things to do…'' France murmurs and he touches the white sheets feeling France's warm skin under them.
''Perverted things I bet…''
''And lovely things, beautiful things!'' France proclaims tiredly and England kneels on his side as guilt takes over him and he swallows hard.
''You are my curse… you can't…. just die and fade away…'' England murmurs as tears gather on his eyes and France nods swallowing.
''You are also mine, cher… ''
''Don't leave me france… I'll be all alone here…'' he admits pleading desperately and France looks at him with kind blue eyes.
''No you won't, you'll have America and… Canada.'' He said slowly and he chuckles sadly.
''That bloody git just cares about himself… and I guess I forget Canada most of the time…'' he hid his face on the white sheets feeling France's thin shoulder and thinking how it is own fault he's like this, he's dying!
''Cher… please… don't be like that.''
''I would trade you git! I would die for you….'' His yells are muffled by the sheets and Feels France sobbing.
''Don't, I wouldn't bear the burden…''
''Now you'll die because of me…'' England admits looking up and shaking presses one hand to the cold face of the French who shakes his head slowly.
''Non! It was not…''
''Yes it was! … Oh Lord….'' He sobs feeling France grab his hand.
''France… it's my fault….'' He murmurs and France smiles sadly.
''Don't despair, I already knew.''' He murmurs and he glares in disbelief, horror and pain.
''When?''
''When you came back desperate and guilty… '' France admits and both miss the door click shut only hearing their hearts and each other.
Meanwhile America who was about to enter on the room stepped outside the room clicking it shut and decided to be the body-guard of the room.
'The truth shall set you free and the deal will be done!' words echoed on England's mind as Tinkerbelle smiled at him vanishing on thin air and he pressed his lips to France's face.
''Forgive me frog…''
''Already did.'' He murmured closing his eyes with a small smile and they stood like that for long minutes.
The next day France was much the same and the dread of losing him was getting into England's mind.
''I'll miss you…'' England murmurs and France smiles.
''I am sure, who wouldn't miss this beautiful face?''
''I can say many names!'' he snipes back noticing France's voice was returning a bit.
''I only care for one…'' France shifts looking at him as he flushed red and looked away.
''Stupid git… wanker…''
''Stay here mon amie… si vous plait…'' France said before he could walk away and he looked at him with a small smile.
''I can't deny a thing to a defunct right ?'' He gazed the French sadly wanting to kiss him once more but not daring to do such thing with a mind so heavy.
''Oui.'' France replied tiredly and they stood just watching each other as memorizing the other again and apologising old wounds.
.
France was getting better. Everyday he felt better and England frowned and denied saying he was only telling them that to leave the room but he was visibly better.
Everyone could see it and he shook his head looking at his fairies in questioning.
They smiled and he realised what happened. The curse was broken.
England was not sure how but he never felt so relieved on his long life. France was not going to die, his only friend was still there to annoy him and corrupt him again and again as ever. Suddenly he felt much better with that thought.
France was eventually dismissed and sent home and he, America and Canada helped him returning home.
France was still with a cloth on his head hiding his naked scalp but he showed England that he was already with tiny hairs with a delighted smile and shinny blue eyes making him feel guilty again.
He will never use magic again to get rid of France.
''It was a trick I tell you! That bloody wanker!'' England complained to America who laughed and France snickered from the back sit.
''I would never ruin my gorgeous hair for you cher, unless it's in the middle of a passionate dance between lovers, I mean.'' He laughed making Canada smile and he shook his head fondly.
''Pervert!''.
Yes, the scared feeling of almost losing France for good was something that changed him but not that much.
Notes:
This is something I had on my words unfinished... old story, yeah I'm finishing a few one shots and this was one of them, not very good though but enjoy.
Thank you for reading and/or reviewing.
Danie.