Salt tears and pure love

I've always felt a bit relieved when he pushed away my hand.

When he avoided eye-contact and opened and closed his hands nervously.

Not a single slight of contact we had. I thought it may be better that way.

Just not that day.

Not that crucial day.

'That certainly looks good on you', Shou yawned while rubbing his eyes. 'That practice totally wore me out.' Nao still stood there with the white jacket on. 'You think so? Doesn't it make me look fat?' Saga let out a big yawn as well. 'No of course not Nao kun, just buy the thing and we can go out of here.' Nao pulled of the jacket and stroke the soft fabric. 'Kay guys, I won't let you wait any longer.' He walked to the cash desk and paid. 'Finally'. Tora and Hiroto stood up and they started to walk back to the apartment. Shou and Saga followed them outside the shop and Nao ran after them.

'Aren't we gonna drink something .. ?', he asked to his band mates. 'No, please Nao san.. now? I'm already as tired as hell', Saga said with an irritated voice. Shou shaked his head as well. 'I'm not in too, I just want to get some rest now.'

Nao walked somewhat faster till he catched up Tora and Hiroto. 'Hey guys, does one of you want to go and drink something with me?', he asked looking as begging as he could. Hiroto only shook his head and ran a hand trough his hair. 'Sorry Nao'.

Tora looked at the other guitarist. Nao felt a weird feeling flowing trough his body. It was almost.. jealousness. Didn't Tora want to go with him cause he wanted to be with Hiroto? He looked at his friend. 'I'll pay..', he added with a smile. Tora pushed his shoulder. 'Kay then', he answered. Nao smile went bigger. 'Great, see you guys later then!', he called and he walked towards a café with Tora.

'So, what do you think?', Tora asked Nao. 'What, huh?', Nao mumbled shaking his head. 'You said something..?' 'Yeah, I did', laughed Tora. 'What were you doing, sleeping?' They were sitting in the café and they were now waiting for their drinks. 'No.. I..I.. nothing', Nao stumbled. Tora took a good look at him. Nao felt not comfortable with that look and looked away, hoping he wasn't blushing. 'Is there anything?', he asked nonchalant. 'No, nothing, really'. The drinks were served by a girl. Tora smiled at her while taking the drinks out of her hands. She looked back at him and smiled too. Nao felt how he made a fist of his hand under the table. Tora gave a glass to him. 'What, now I wanna know!' he said looking curious. Nao stared at the table. Maybe this was really the time to tell him…He had to do sómething.

'Ehm… do you… do you…', he stumbled. He looked at his shoes, he didn't want Tora to see his read head. 'Do you think she's cuter than me?' he finally finished his sentence. He didn't dare to look at Tora so he stared at his knees.

Then he heard Tora laughing. He looked up. 'No no, you're very cute Nao san', he said smiling. 'And you're even cuter wearing this thing..', he continued and grabbed the fluffy white jacked Nao had bought.

'So..'. He dropped the thing around his shoulder and pulled the hood on his head. 'Awh how cute!', he said grinning. He poked to the cat-like ears that were made on the hood. Nao smiled weakly. 'You think so?', he asked to be sure. Tora look rather surprised at him. 'Yeah, I'm sure you dumbass. What is it with you today?' Nao took a large zip of his drink. 'No-thing', he said again. 'Okay then', Tora said and he emptied his glass in one large zip. 'I think we should go, it's already dark outside', he said. Nao nodded and they left the money on the table. Tora didn't gave a tip and Nao felt somewhat better.

'My apartment is not so far from here, maybe we should go there', Tora suggested. Nao would love that but he still didn't know if that was the right thing to do. 'Well, like you said.. it's already late. I think I have to go home too', he answered. Tora nodded. 'Kay', was his short reply. It was not okay. Nao felt terrible when he saw Tora walking away. Why did he say he wanted to go home? He sighed. Then he saw two girls passing Tora. They talked to him and then they walked together around the corner. Nao hit his hand hard on a store wall. Why? This wasn't fair. He felt tears coming up.

He walked further and felt his hand burning. His own fault. A tear rolled down his face, then a few followed. He sniffed his nose hard. The worst thing was that Tora didn't even care about this. That he was walking alone now, that he felt terrible and sad. But how could he know? He couldn't. Nao never said such a thing. He pulled the hood a bit deeper down his eyes when he crossed the street.

After some time he finally got home. He searched for his key, found it, and unlocked the door. He stepped inside and pulled of his jacket. He sat down a chair and stared to a pencil case laying on the table for like 10 minutes. Then his cell phone rang. He looked at the screen. Shou calling. He held the phone by his ear. 'Moshi Moshi, what is it?', he asked and tried to sound as normal as possible. 'Moshi Moshi, I just wanted to ask if you're already home', Shou asked trough the telephone. Nao sighed. 'Yeah, I'm home now. Why?' Shou coughed a bit. 'Cause you went for a drink with Tora and he isn't at his apartment yet.' Nao sucked on his thumb. 'How do you know that?', he asked and took his thumb out of his mouth for a second. 'Well, I went to his apartment to bring some magazines he left at mine but he wasn't home', Shou said. 'Awh..', said Nao still sucking on his thumb. 'So, were do you think that bastard his hanging out then?' Nao stopped sucking and bit on his lip. 'I saw him walking home with two other girls…maybe he is with one of them'. Only the idea made him sick of jealousness. 'Owh, that explains a lot. Then I don't need to worry. I won't disturb him on his dates', Shou laughed. 'Hmm, yeah', Nao mumbled. He wished Shou would hung up the phone.

'See u tomorrow then', Shou said sounding rather relaxed. 'Till tomorrow', Nao replied and hung up his mobile. He stared at the same pencil case again. 'Tora..', he whispered. Why did that asshole go to one of those girls? In the café Tora said that he was cuter than that girl, but maybe that was only to make him feel a bit better. He sniffed and realized that some tears were coming up again. He was so sensitive sometimes. He couldn't stand it.

Suddenly the door opened. Tora stepped inside holing a case with beer. 'Hey, I thought… well, you were looking so unhappy that I came to cheer you up!' Nao stared at him. 'Tora!' he cried. Tora smiled at him. 'Yeah buddy. Here..', he gave him a beer. 'Drink this up and… Wow, did you cry?' he asked. Nao turned his head away. 'Hey..', Tora said caring and laid his hands around his face. Nao looked quick at him. He felt like his face was burning, now Tora was holing it. 'Nao…?'

Nao only sat there and was holding the beer in his sweating hand. Tora's face bowed near to him. 'Nao, what's wrong?' he asked soft and stroke Nao's hair.

A tear dropped down and fell on Nao's lap. 'Nao! Hey, please don't cry!' said Tora almost with despair. 'You can tell me, did someone hurt you?'

Nao coughed a bit as he wiped away a few tears. 'You-…you came', he said in a cracking voice. 'Of course I did silly', Tora said and began to wipe Nao's face. 'No reason to cry over, isn't it?' he said smiling.

Nao looked at him. He felt Tora near to him. Nearer than he had felt him ever before.

'Thank you', he said in a whisper and he kissed Tora's cheek. Tora didn't look angry, only a bit surprised. 'You welcome', he said and kissed Nao on his mouth.

Nao felt his heart beating faster than ever. He felt how his hands became clam. His legs were shaking and tears were flowing down his face again. But that all didn't matter. He only felt Tora's warm lips. Nao could taste his tears, like a salt kiss. And then he suddenly saw that it weren't only his tears. Tora's face was wet and a bit red too.

When they let go of each other, Nao softly stroke his face and cleaned up his tears. Tora smiled at him. He pulled Nao a bit closer to him and embraced him tightly.

'Tora…', Nao whispered soft. Tora looked down at him. 'Yeah Nao chan..', he said while playing with some hair strokes of Nao. 'I didn't know…. If I only knew that..', Nao said.

Tora kissed his forehead. 'Now you know. I always liked you Nao.' Nao felt happier than ever. 'I like you too Tora. I always did', he said feeling very warm and comfortable sitting here in Tora's lap. They smiled back at each other and Tora caressed the arms and hair of his friend.

Nao's cell phone rang again. Tora motioned him not to pick up. Nao looked at the screen of his phone. Shou calling. 'One moment dear', he said and saw how Tora was smiling when he heard the word "dear". He picked up the phone. 'Hey Nao kun..I', he heard Shou saying. 'Don't worry any longer', Nao replied. 'What? About what?' Shou asked confused. 'Tora is here. He's all save here', Nao said and he felt his heart jumping when he said that. 'Okay….', Shou said. It was pretty obvious he had no idea were Nao was talking about. 'Sorry, I got to hang up. Tora is missing me', Nao smirked.

'Wha-', Shou stumbled. And the last thing he heard before the contact was broken, was the sound of a long kiss at the other side of the line.