Disclaimer: Nothing here belongs to me. I am just borrowing these characters.

Warnings: M: incest, all that good stuff

A/N: My very first fanfic. I appreciate your comments, be they praise or critique. Thanks for reading!

Awakenings

Susan was finally asleep after having tossed and turned on the hard ground to find a comfortable spot for what seemed like half the night. She finally wedged her arm under her head, curled up and fell into a lovely dream. She was back home and warm, with tea and the widest assortment of teacakes anyone could ever want. Her favorites were there, little white frosted petit fours with a pink rose on top, the kind that she was rarely allowed to indulge in. Just as she was reaching for one, her gloved hand about to touch the unblemished marzipan, something started to draw her from the vision. She realized as the dream faded that whatever it was had been bothering her for some time, but she had been able to ignore it. She tried to burrow back into sleep, but it was already gone. She felt the lumpy ground jutting into her hipbone.

Irritation flooded her, and she tried to locate the source of her arousal. There was nothing that she could immediately discern. They were all still sleeping, out in the forest, on their way to find Aslan in this strange place. She could tell that it was still a few hours until dawn, and that Lucy and Edmund had slightly rolled together and been stopped by a tree. Probably a combination of the chill and the fact that they were both active sleepers. They were conked out and would stay that way until morning. Everything seemed to be in place. Susan was about to turn over and start the whole ritual of throwing herself around to get comfortable when she heard a sound. She froze.

There. That was it. It was a gentle but continuous brush. Her eyes widened. That sound had been going on for long enough to wake her. What was it? Was someone entering their camp? It didn't sound like footsteps. She stilled her breathing and tried to locate the source. It was behind her, closer to Peter. He usually was a light sleeper, but maybe he was tired from the whole adventure, and the burden of being the eldest had to weigh heavy on his shoulders.

Susan very slowly eased onto her back and cut her eyes to Peter. He was on his side, sleeping away from her. Just as she was about to reach a hand out to wake him, she saw in the dark that he was moving. Her heart beat faster. What was he doing? Was he okay? The movements he was making were rhythmic and steady, clearly what was making the sound. All of a sudden he made a groan. Susan gasped a little, totally mystified.

Peter heard her gasp and stopped. He cleared his throat and whispered "Susan, are you awake?" He turned partially to peek an eye in her direction.

Susan had no idea what was going to happen next, but she felt her temper stirring. "What are you doing, Peter? You woke me up right after I had just gotten to sleep! I swear, you've been making noise for the last thirty minutes!"

Peter's face went three shades of red. "Sorry," he mumbled.

She felt her ire rise uncharacteristically. "That's all you have to say for yourself? You are being awfully rude! What are you doing?"

"I said sorry. Just go back to sleep." He rolled away.

Now her curiosity was starting to get the better of her. She wouldn't sleep now, anyway, so she might as well talk to him. There seemed to be a mystery here, and Susan didn't like to be left in the dark. "Peter. Just talk to me. Why were you awake all this time? Do you need something?" She remembered his groan. "Are you in pain? I can help you. I want to help."

Peter sighed. There was a silence. " You really don't know what I was doing? You're that innocent?"

Susan's eyebrows drew together in the dark. "I don't have a clue why you are being so stubborn about telling me what your problem is. How does that make me innocent?"

His voice was quiet. "Can't you just leave it be? Don't ask what you don't want to hear, Susan."

Susan put her arm on his shoulder and pulled him so that they were both lying flat on the ground, shoulder to shoulder. "You know, Peter, you don't have to take the burdens of the whole world on yourself all the time. You do so much for this family, can't you just let me in a little, let me be your confidante? I'd be able to help."

"You think you're so worldly, so grown up, but there is a lot you don't know and wouldn't know what to do with, Susan. The fact that you don't even know what I was doing a few minutes ago proves that." Peter sounded resigned.

Susan licked her lips. A challenge always brought out the best in her. "Try me, Peter. Trust me, and tell me." She propped herself up on an elbow to look at him and hear the news. What he said next was not anything she could have prepared herself for.

"Okay, Susan, have it your way." Peter was still lying on his back. He looked into her eyes to gauge her reaction to what he was about to tell her. "I was touching myself. I have been in torment for ages now, forever, it feels like, and I can barely wait for you to fall asleep so that I can do it. It's the only way I can get through the days. Watching you...although it seems I needn't have waited for you to sleep," he laughed bitterly. "You don't know what you saw anyway."

Heat flooded Susan's cheeks, but she didn't know exactly why. This was a lot of information, and not what she expected at all. Touched himself? Suddenly, the meaning of the movements became blindingly clear, and she was flooded with an embarrassment so acute she thought her heart might stop. Embarrassment for whom, she didn't know. Herself, or him; both. Peter's eyes never left her face. He watched the myriad of emotions flit across her face, and he refused to be ashamed. He waited.

Susan was still dumbfounded by this unexpected turn in the conversation. This was not at all what she envisioned, and she was, for once, completely speechless. She also was feeling heat pool in the deep parts of her. That was a new feeling, and one that she wasn't sure was entirely safe. When she thought of his groans, it made something run liquid inside her. She had to get her wits!

Peter was still watching Susan's thoughts flick across her face. Her emotions had run the gamut in the last few moments, but none seemed to be disgust. Not that he cared if they were. She stumbled into that hornet's nest on her own.

"Watching you. You said that, watching you. What did you mean?" Susan said this quietly. She hoped this would diffuse some of the embarrassment that seemed to be heavy upon them like a wet blanket.

Peter put his hands behind his head. "I wondered if you heard me. I meant what I said, Sue. Watching you puts me in that state. I...want you. That way. I can't stand it any more. I haven't said anything to you, I haven't wanted to hurt you, but I can't lie to my own body. I am a man now, and I want...a woman."

The sudden flare of anger lit up Susan and caught her by surprise. The words were out before she could stop them "So go find one!" They hung there, between them, sounding as impetuous as they were.

Peter quirked a smile. The gleam in his eyes wasn't quite mean. "Jealous, Sue?" He paused a beat while she floundered. The thoughts ran through her head so fast she couldn't catch them as they whizzed by. What was wrong with her? He was making her into a ninny! She wouldn't have it! She didn't know how to fight the feelings, there were too many, too soon. But he negated it all by reaching up a hand and running his knuckles along her jawline, so lightly she could barely feel it. "Where would I find a woman here, now? Talking beavers and witches, maybe. And there isn't anyone I want, anyway."

Oddly, she felt deflated, and her eyes dropped. She saw in his lap the evidence of his arousal. Susan was an innocent, but she couldn't mistake that. She must have interrupted him in the middle, and he didn't have time to finish. She should look away, but she had never seen a male before, and she was curious. She bit her lip.

Peter saw where Susan's gaze had fallen and he tried to shift away, but it was not possible to conceal himself. He was straining mightily at the fabric of his breeches, and knowing that she was looking was making it all the harder to will himself down. Besides being caught at a crucial moment, it just wasn't possible to think it away, or he would have already done that years ago. He had accepted that he was in love with his sister a long time ago. Now he just had to live with it and see if she could do the same.

Susan was mesmerized by the continued swelling of her brother's pants. She watched without saying a word, all the while the feeling swirling in the pit of her stomach. She knew that to feel anything other than sisterly affection were not acceptable, but she could not deny the little sparks that were starting to churn between her thighs. This was all new to her, and hard to ignore. Maybe if she just touched him...he seemed to want to touch her...her hand reached out the smallest bit before she remembered what she was doing. She took a breath to clear her head. It didn't help.

Peter saw, even in the dimness, the movement of her hand towards him. His blood was pounding already. " Susan. Touch me." He heard the hoarseness in his voice. He had never done this before, but he had imagined it so many times. This was taking on a quality of the surreal.

Susan reacted to his voice and reached a hand out gently to touch the bulge in his pants. It was hard, and her eyes were as wide as saucers as she petted him through his pants.

Peter breathed in "Harder."

"I don't want to hurt you,"

"You won't"

"I might, I can be strong"

"Susan, you won't."

Susan stroked harder, and Peter gritted his teeth. He unfastened his breeches and pulled his erection free, the night air a shock against his hot flesh. Susan's cheeks were red, but she wordlessly grasped the shaft and smoothed her hands over it. Her hands felt like butterflies all over him. "Harder. Faster." Peter sucked in air like a drowning man as he watched her face. She was concentrating on him so hard, like she had a treasure to unlock, and it felt so good. He loved the way her mouth was pursed and her tongue stuck out a little...all of a sudden the sensations were so good, he couldn't stop. "Susan, stop, wait," He grabbed her hands and stilled them. How embarrassing that would have been for him. That was close.

Susan didn't know why he stopped her. Had she done something wrong? He seemed to be enjoying it. She certainly was. There was something exciting and forbidden about doing this with another person. Peter sat up and kissed her then. His lips moved gently over hers, and she had never felt anything so sweet. Her felt her knees grow weak and was glad they were on the ground. His kisses grew more insistent, and she felt her mouth opening. His tongue was in her mouth! She could feel fire in her belly, scorching heat shooting all the way down through the core of her. When Peter rolled on top of her, her clothes just felt like a barrier. She pulled off her shirt. Her breasts were so sensitive, she just wanted to arch against him.

Peter pulled away and looked at Susan. Her exposed breasts almost sent him over the edge. That very image of her, in the moonlight with her hair around her shoulders and the pink tips of her nipples puckering, made his hips buck instinctively. He drew a ragged breath in. He wanted to be a man for her, but he just couldn't wait to suck on her skin. It was so soft, it would be his undoing.

"Peter," Susan murmured, her eyes were glassy as she looked up at him. She felt like she were in a dream, like this were happening to someone else, but then when she looked at her brother, he looked half wild. He had always been good looking, but now he looked savage. It thrilled her, the look on his face, and it was just for her. She couldn't explain what she wanted to him, but the feeling was building, and only he could give it to her. She ran a hand over her own nipple and it pebbled instantly. Susan groaned. She ran her fingers over the hard tip. It felt good. She arched her head, her neck growing long and white in the moonlight.

Peter was watching Susan in a trance, and now a low moan was building in his throat. He knocked her hand away and suckled at her breast hungrily. She whimpered. He ran his tongue around and around the stiff peak, teasing it.

Susan was getting frustrated with need. "Peter, I want you. Please."

That was all the invitation Peter needed. He could hardly stand the torment any longer. He ran a hand up Susan's leg and found the edge of her panties. They were soaked through with her need for him. She wiggled out of her clothes, and he quickly shed the rest of his. The skin to skin contact alone was enough to make him giddy.

Susan felt like she had fire in her veins. She was consumed by her lust for her brother. He was all she could see, or smell. He had been in her life for as long as she could remember, and he was here now. She couldn't bear to think anything else other than that she had to have him, for good or for bad. It didn't matter what the outcome was, she was overcome with her want of him, filling her at this most crucial time. She couldn't seem to get enough of him, to be close enough. She just wanted more, whatever that was, to whatever end it took her. And she was starting to feel a fever pitch in her core. Her hips were rolling, she could hear her own voice making a little grunting noise.

Peter touched Susan and felt wetness on his fingers. He gently slid one finger into her, and she whimpered. He moved it in and out slowly, and her hips pumped in time. "I want you, Peter," she whispered.

He swallowed convulsively. He was right on the edge. She was a virgin, and he didn't want to hurt her. "I have to go slowly," he warned. "It will hurt the first time."

Susan's eyes opened. "I know, but I want you now. Just do it fast."

Peter positioned himself between her legs and felt her entrance. She was so tight and hot. He took a breath and plunged in quickly. All he felt was sensation. It was so good, it took all his concentration not to come right there. He looked down. Susan was rigid, and she was holding her breath. But then she slowly relaxed. "I can't stop, Sue," he shuddered, as she began to move. It was so good, so much. It was better than he ever imagined. He had to pump, and he was like a rutting stag, he couldn't stop, over and over, but it was the best feeling, fucking his sister until he came all over, the hard bursts like stars raining down before his eyes. He couldn't see anything but her.

Susan had never felt such power over another person. She throbbed a little with just the thought. He was hers, forever. They would never be apart. She would always be adored.

Peter leaned over and kissed her cheek. "It was always you, Susan. I'm glad I waited for you."