"Cheers!"

Regina and Emma raised their glasses of Jack on the rocks and were ready to drown in their sorrows when-

"Mom! I found something big!" Henry called.

"Whoa, kid. Slow down!" Emma replied.

"You're gonna want to see this!"

Once they got to the mansion, Henry led Emma and Regina down a corridor that ended at a wooden wall. "After you guys left, I stayed behind to look around, and I found something."

He reached up to one of the lights and pull it down. The "wall" shifted and turned, opening to reveal-

"A library!" Emma gasped.

"Not just any library," Henry said. "Look."

The shelves were stacked with hardcover tomes from floor to ceiling. There was something familiar about each volume,,,

"That looks like your book," Emma said.

"Only it's blank," Henry replied. "They all are."

Regina pulled one of the books off the shelf and thumbed through it. Nothing but blank paper.

"And if this place is full of potential Storybooks..." Henry started.

"Then maybe this is the author's house!" Regina grinned. "Henry, you did it!"

"Did what?" Emma asked. "What's going on?"

"Well, uh, we were looking for the author," Regina answered. "I was hoping he could write me a happier story."

"We called that 'Operation Mongoose'," Henry explained.

"I like it," Emma said. "It's got style. I'm in."

Regina's eyes widened. "You are?!"

"I made you a promise I intend to keep," Emma replied. "Everyone deserves their happy ending."

They were interrupted by the sound of a ping! coming from the desk followed by a

"You've got mail!"

"-What the?"

"The Author uses a Macbook Air?" Regina asked.

Henry opened up the laptop. "The only programs he has are MS Word, Outlook and Internet Explorer."

Emma leaned forward to look at the screen. "It looks like he was working on a database for a website… a fanfiction dot net."

"Fan-fiction?" Regina repeated. "There's a website devoted to stories?"

"Let's see," Henry said. "Sort by date, characters, genre, rating."

"Try characters," Regina said.

Henry clicked on 'Characters' and-

"Mom…?"

"I see it, Henry," Emma said.

"What is it?" Regina demanded. "Oh God, it has a list of everyone who lives in Storybrooke!"

She grabbed the laptop and started typing.

"What are you doing?" Emma asked.

"What does it looked like?" Regina said. "My name's listed. So is yours and Henry's."

"Can you bring up the files?" Henry asked.

Regina clicked on one at random. "Hmmm. 'Rated M for Swan/Queen slash'. Must be some kind of horror story where I slit your throat."

"I don't think that's what it means," Henry said nervously.

Emma started reading: "'With one bound, Emma was by Regina's side as she slowly started to kiss her fair, ample-'"

Regina slammed the laptop closed and grabbed Henry by the collar as the three started to storm out of the mansion like a bat out of hell.

"Hey-" Henry protested.

"Operation Mongoose has been indefinitely aborted!" Regina exclaimed.

.

* * *

Emma and Regina were back at the bar drinking Jack Daniels straight from the bottle while trying to put together their recent 'WTF?' moment.

"No one can ever know," Emma said.

"No one," Regina nodded. "Not Hook, not your parents. And especially not Gold!"

"His name was on that site," Emma said.

Regina shuddered. "Don't remind me."

The corner of Emma's lip twisted. "You know that fanfiction dot net has mobile phone support?"

The two instantly whipped out their phones and scrambled to type in details.

"This stuff's way better than HBO!" Emma said.

"Screw happy endings!" Regina grinned maniacally. "Here's to Lemons!"

.

A/N:
Please rate and review, as well as look through my other stories. I've just updated my MK/OUAT crossover entitled "Once Upon a Tournament". Thanks for reading.