Disclaimer – I wish I could write wonderfully. Like Meg Cabot. These are her books, her characters, and although I wish Michael Moscovitz was mine, he is hers too.

In Case You Don't Realize It - These are all entries in Michael's online journal. I didn't think Michael would be the type to keep a written journal, but as almost everyone I know has one, and he kind of seemed like one who would. And don't penalize me. This is the format used on many online journals. Onto the story!

Thursday, September 25

Mood: nerdy

Music: If It Were Up to Me – Rooney

I think it's about time I got one of these things. All of the people in Computer Club have them. I asked them what they write about. Most of them write about their day.

So I guess I'll start off with how my day went.

It was just great. Just great.

First of all, I tried about 687 different online journal websites before choosing this one. I kind of like it. Except I have no friends on my list. So there'll be no comments. Which is good. I don't want anybody reading this. Lilly will probably figure out how to access it, and she'll find out about... well it's sort of complicated. Forget it.

Second of all, I learned that the Algebra teacher, Mr. G, is dating Mia's mom. That has got to be extremely weird for her. I overheard her and Lily talking about it, and I couldn't help myself. I started laughing hysterically. Mia looked around and looked absolutely TERRIFIED that I had just heard of her predicament.

Then Mia started begging me not to tell anybody. It's not like I was going to. What, does she not trust me or something? Ouch. I'd trust her. I don't think of her as my little sister's best friend. I just think of her as, well, my friend. She's just my friend!

At least, that's what I should be thinking of her as.

Are you starting to get the big picture?

Anyway, then I decided to get Mia back for making me feel untrustworthy. I kept on asking her, "What'll you do for me, huh, Thermopolis? What'll you do for me?" And she didn't get the joke, and was actually offering to do stuff like walk Pavlov or something. I told her to just forget it.

I feel bad for her though. It's not exactly the best thing when you're failing Algebra and your mom starts to date your Algebra teacher. Not that I would know. But I can just guess. And now Lilly is starting to get on my case about something. Something about sexually harassing Mia??

I have to go wage another famous Moscovitz war against Lilly. I'll update tomorrow.

Wednesday, October 1

Mood: pissed off

Music: Christina Aguilera – coming from somewhere near the vicinity of Lilly's room

Okay, so I didn't update the other day.

Sorry. I was busy staying sane.

Anyway, Lilly thought that I was sexually harassing Mia on Thursday, which, of course, I would never do. Because... it's not nice to sexually harass anyone. Including Mia.

So here's our conversation as far as I can remember.

Lilly: So. Now it's not only enough to treat me like crap, you have treat Mia like crap too?

Me: What are you talking about? I don't treat her like crap!

Lilly: You were sexually harassing her today!

Me: I was not! I wouldn't ever do that to Mia!

Lilly: narrowing her eyes mmmhmm.

Me: What?! I'm just saying that I wouldn't ever do that to her. It's not nice, and I wouldn't do that to anybody ever for that matter. I was just kidding.

Lilly: Mmmhmm. So, then, next time you should really consider making your intentions more obvious. Because Mia had no clue you as to what you were doing.

Me: What, did you tell her I was sexually harassing her? silence from Lilly Lilly!

Lilly: Yes. Now shut up, I'm going to go to bed.

So now Mia thinks I was sexually harassing her. This is always how I wanted her to think of me. Oh, yeah. I wish on stars, I pray she thinks I'm a real jerk.

As if she really thinks of me at all.

Saturday, October 4

Mood: morose

Music: Lilly and Mia talking

Mia spent the night over at our house tonight. She seemed a little preoccupied. Maybe that's a good thing though. I hoped she wouldn't remember that I supposedly harassed her. Then I would've felt a little embarrassed.

Mia's dad actually called and said he needed to speak with her right away. And so I went and told Mia.

Now, see, this is interesting.

When Mia is here, I mean, at my house, I can't help but notice she doesn't look directly at me.

She looks at my torso.

And when we're at school, she does no such thing.

I don't think I'm fat or anything, but the reason why Mia looks at my torso is probably because I don't have a good build. Usually the two of them (Mia and Lilly) are watching a movie that has a whole slew of actors that make guys like me look bad. The first time she did that, I started doing sit-ups right away in my room. About 50. I still must look really bad in comparison, because she still looks there. Sometimes I don't even wear a shirt, and I forget she's over and then I go out of my room. It's not pretty. I sometimes expect Lilly to say something degrading like, "Put that away! No one wants to see that!"

I can't help but wonder what Mia thinks of me. Maybe that's why I do the 50 sit-ups a day. Just so that I can improve Mia's image of me.

Oh, but wait. The night just kept on getting better.

Mia asked me the weirdest question ever:

If it was the end of the world and I had to repopulate the planet but I can only choose one life mate, who would it be, Xena, or Buffy?

I chose Buffy, of course. Buffy is the most perfect fictional character out there.

Then Lilly asks Mia the same kind of question, and she went on like that until I asked if they would repopulate the planet with Harrison Ford, or Josh Richter.

I'm such a sneaky bastard.

Lilly chose Harrison, but Mia chose Josh! So then I started on Josh's cons, because, let's face it, there are much more to name than pros.

I could just see Mia boiling over. So I guessed she has a crush on Josh.

I even asked Mia if she would ever put out for Josh.

And she made up 3 conditions under which she would put out for Josh.

Whatever. So that whole question was probably the worst move I've ever made in my entire life.

Then Lilly starts again and asks me if I would choose Lana or Mia.

Um, excuse me, but I would choose Mia over almost anyone.

Except for maybe Buffy. Lilly asked about Buffy vs. Mia. I just said Buffy. I guess I kind of wanted to make Mia mad for standing up for Josh.

But she was totally cool about it.

She's extraordinary. Really, she is.

Then Lilly asked her if she would choose me or Josh.

And she actually thought about it.

She was just sitting there, not wanting to exactly dis me, but not wanting to lie and say, "Michael," because I knew that "Josh" was her answer. I could just tell.

This was even after I said I would choose her over Lana!

These women, I'm telling you. They will stop at nothing to tear your heart apart.

UPDATE:

I hate it when I'm right.

I was talking with Mia online. I copy/pasted the conversation here.

CracKing: What do you want, Thermopolis?

FtLouie: I want to talk to Lilly. Please go off-line so I can call her.

CracKing: What do you want to talk to her about?

I wanted to annoy her a lot. Payback is bittersweet however.

FtLouie: None of your business. Just go off-line, please. You can't hog all the lines of communication to yourself. It isn't fair.

CracKing: No one ever said life was fair, Thermopolis. What are you doing home, anyway? What's the matter? Dreamboy didn't call?

I was just taking a very well-educated guess that she chose Josh Richter.

FtLouie: Who's Dreamboy?

CracKing: You know, your postnucleur Armageddon lifemate of choice, Josh Richter.

FtLouie: Would you please go off-line so I can call Lilly????

CracKing: What's the matter, Thermopolis? Did I strike a nerve?

However, she didn't exactly agree. Maybe I have a chance. But then she logged off. I'm so screwed. And now she probably thinks I'm a big jerk.

So I apologized in my own way.

I logged off and told Lilly to call her.

Now they can talk about Josh Richter all they want to.

Monday, October 6

Mood: okay

Music: Indiana Jones soundtrack

Mia failed her Algebra quiz.

I should really help her or something. Now that I have more time on my hands.

Lilly told me that she did choose Josh.

I think I really want to punch Josh sometimes.

If I hear that name one more time, I'm definitely going to call him out. See if he chooses cowardice or not.

Please read and review! I'm sorry if it's very much unlike Michael. I tried. Look for the next part to the Princess Diaries coming soon! I'm going to try and do all of the books in Michael's POV.