A/N: Koumei x Hakuei is my rare pairing. I enjoy thinking and writing about them, especially from Koumei's point of view since I believe that he's the one who has shown some feelings so far.
Does anybody else ships them? If you do, you seriously need to let me know. Because it's rather lonely being a shipper of those two..
Disclaimer: I do not own magi or its characters.
Koumei was watching the cherry trees in the imperial palace's garden. The leaves were falling from the trees just like the summer gave its place to autumn. The movements of the fallen leaves in the air always made him relax. He closed his eyes trying to save the moment. His mind was filled with a clear laughter, though. That voice could only belong to his gallant cousin, Hakuei. She was in the company of her household somewhere not very far away from the place Koumei was standing. If he opened his eyes and concentrated enough he could even discern her figure. He decided against it. It was safer to stay with his eyes shut.
As long as I don't look at her my face won't betray me and reveal my feelings, he thought, as long as I'm far enough I'm safe.
Still, he longed to join her. She was away for six months before she returned the previous week. He had missed her. The palace wasn't the same without her presence. Surely, his daily routine was the same and as tiring as ever but something felt different when she wasn't there. The sky seemed grayer to him, like the song of the birds seemed fainter. It was like she took all the colors and the melodies away when she was gone.
A louder laugh, her laugh, interrupted his thoughts once again.
I have never made her laugh, he observed, I wonder how it feels to make her laugh, to make her happy, to see her radiant smile and knowing you are the one who caused it.
His mind travelled back to the day he saw her smile for her first time. He could never forget that day. It was the day he met his younger cousins. It was a snowy morning, when the cherry trees that were in front of him were bare if not for the snow that was perching on their branches.
He could still recall his brother's demanding voice as he was warning him not to make a fool of himself. Those kids might were their younger cousins but they were the Emperor's children which made them superior to them and Kouen was always the person who cared about formalities.
Koumei on the other hand, was the opposite. He couldn't care less whether he would be proper or not. All he cared was that he was forced to wake up earlier that morning, already missing his warm comfortable bed. If it wasn't for his brother who seemed to consider that meeting was an important one, he would have returned to his bed.
But instead he stayed. He stayed and waited for a long time. Kouen told him that something happened to the young prince which made them delay the appointment. Then, he continued describing what have happened to their youngest cousin but Koumei stopped paying attention to him as he felt his eyelids growing heavier.
He must have slept for a while, as there was a hole in his memories at this point. What he remembered was a loud noise as he met the cold ground and then feeling hurt. He left a small groan and opened his eyes. Just in front of him was standing a girl, a few years younger than him, who had a shocked expression on her face.
Damn! That must be the little princess!
His brother had warned him not to make a fool of himself and that was exactly what he did. He felt cold sweat running to his neck. This wouldn't end up well.
Kouen took a step forward and then bowed so low that his forehead almost met the ground. Unfortunately for Koumei, he dragged him down with himself, too.
"Hakuei-hime, we are terribly sorry for this disturbance. My brother never meant to scare you" at this point he gave a warning to Koumei "and I know that he really feels sorry about it".
"It's okay Kouen-san. He didn't scare me. Not at all." the princess replied in honesty. Then she turned to look Koumei once again. "You must be Koumei-san; I'm pleased to meet you".
She gave him a big, warm smile and then she turned to her little brother on her side that had been too shy to introduce himself.
Koumei thought for the first time that it might be okay to serve under the imperial family if everyone there had such a radiant smile and kind eyes.
It was two years later when the tragic event of her father's and brothers' death occurred. The cruel fire had left her without three of her beloved family members and with a younger brother who was at the time at the death's door.
The funeral of the Emperor and his sons was held a morning when the cherry trees had just blossomed. It was an irony to see the nature celebrate the coming of spring when a great leader had died. The same morning, his father was crowned an Emperor and declared his decision to marry his late brother's wife. From that moment, his cousin stopped being superior to him and instead she became inferior just like she gained the status of a step-sister as well.
Koumei felt so sorry for her, having lost so many things in so little amount of time. He wanted to comfort her, tell her that everything would get better in time and let her cry in his arms. But he never dared to do so. Instead, he silently watched her as she bowed at him every time they met from that day on and respectfully calling him "Koumei-dono".
Please don't call me that, was his thoughts every time she spoke to him, it wasn't meant to be that way.
The years passed and Hakuei blossomed to a beautiful woman. Koumei often wondered if he was the only one who had noticed it and why the people didn't stop in awe to admire her every time she was around. There was something wrong with this world. Or perhapsthere was something wrong with him.
For something was surely wrong about him. He had stopped having innocent thoughts about Hakuei a long time ago. His mind often wondered how it would be touching her silky hair or kissing her tempting lips. Koumei tried his best to stay away from sinful thoughts. Hakuei was a person that needed to be admired and worshiped for all her natural gifts and not someone who should be tainted by his ugly hands.
Then came a day, when his cousin was promoted to a general. It was her idea, because she wanted to be useful to her country and follow their family's dream. After all, nobody could even say that the princess was short in courage. His father and his brother were more than happy to let her gain such rank, because they needed all the help they could get in order to conquer the world and it wasn't like they could use her as a marriage alliance anyway.
That was the first time Koumei was angry with them. How could they let her take such a perilous position? Didn't they know the risks she would have to put herself in?
Battlefield wasn't a place for a princess and especially not for one as delicate as his cousin. She should remain in the palace, being happy and innocent hidden away from the world's cruelty. She was never meant to face the monsters this world harbored. And yet, there she was fearless and excited to face the unknown.
In the years to come, she proved herself a dependable general gaining many victories for their country. Still, Koumei couldn't help but feeling anxious and afraid for her every time she departed. He could never shake off the horrible feeling that this was maybe the last time he was seeing her. That something terrible might happened to her when she was away and that she couldn't return back home.
Don't go where I can't follow, was his thoughts every time she was preparing for another departure.
For that reason his relief was huge every time she returned; like she did a week ago. Everyone in the palace whispered about the princess' bravery and her glorious victory of adding the Kouga clan to their army. They all admired her now, like she deserved.
However, Koumei was still worried about her. Her new scar didn't escape his careful glance and he was wondering how she gained it. What had she gone through while she was away? Did something important happen?
Those questions were haunting his mind. But he knew that he would never ask her about it; just like he wouldn't join her company tonight. Instead, he would always watch her from the sidelines. Never too far but never too close, either.
For she's a daughter of light and belongs with the sun, while I'll always be hidden in the darkest corners with only the pale moon to accompany me.
A/N: Please review and let me know what you think of my story :)