In honor of the anniversary of my first fanfiction ever being posted, here is a special treat.

My first fanfiction was a little short in the Papi v1 universe called "Family Affairs". Shortly after that, I posted Papi. Family Affairs dealt with Leo, as a single father, going through the day his mother died.

Well, I wanted to expand upon the single father idea. I'm not a single parent, but seeing as how I had to deal with a screaming, sick baby in the camper two nights in a row (and by deal with, I mean listen to her cry as her mom and dad tried to settle her down) I thought about how hard it must be for single fathers. They don't have someone to call when the baby starts crying. No one can tap in for them. For a mom, it's a little easier if they have that maternal instinct. Dad's don't have that. When first confronted with a baby, generally they have no idea what it wants.

Leo is no exception. He never thought he'd have kids, so when it comes to screaming babies, especially his own, he draws a blank on how to make them stop crying.

I was going to release this on the 19th, on the day Family Affairs came out, but decided to spoil you guys for being so awesome and supportive throughout my posting career. It's been a great year, guys, and I hope to bring you more Valdez stories in the future!

Also, please tell me if the title is correct. I know a tiny bit of German and Chinese, but Spanish? Not so much.

I own nothing you recognize as canon.

*~Noches de Insomnio~*

(Sleepless Nights)

-A Leo Valdez Fanfiction-

Note: This is set in Papi v1 story-verse, meaning Calypso is stuck on Ogygia (after the initial rescue), and has left Leo—with no memories of her or the years he spent with her—to raise their twins alone in Houston.

Leo Valdez was sick of everything. Sick of nights. Sick of his stupid little Tiny Festus Mark 1. Sick of being woken up at two in the morning. Sick of babies.

TF1, the prototype mini-Festus Leo had built with too much personality, kept prodding his face. The speaker within its mouth kept blaring into his ear. A screaming baby sound made Leo's insides curl and wither.

Two months. Two months! Leo had had these babies for two months now, along with a grand total of three hours of sleep in that timeframe.

He'd try anything to shut these kids up—well, actually it was just one kid most of the time. The other was pretty good at being quiet, unless he started sympathy-crying for his sister.

Leo rose from his bed, coughing. He knew he had a fever, but he couldn't just lie in bed with screaming babies in the next room. He shuffled out of the room, sniffling. TF1 followed, nudging his shoulder every time it thought he wasn't going fast enough.

The next room over used to be a second guest room until the babies magically showed up. It was small, but efficient. Little baby toys were thrown about the room. A magically refillable diaper bag sat next to the crib.

One baby twin was clearly up. Her name was Esperanza—or Espie, as Leo liked to call her. She was a little spitfire who did not like her dad getting a good night sleep. No matter what Leo did—check her diaper, feed her, give her a binky, put her brother next to her (sometimes she just needed him), or rock her gently—the little girl would not stop crying. Leo was worried she might lose her voice before she even spoke her first word.

The brother, Tulio, grumbled in his sleep. After constantly hearing his sister cry, he'd developed the sleep habits of a rock. Leo wished Espie would take the cue.

He picked Espie up and rocked her in his arms. "Shh," he cooed. "Please be quiet, Espie. You're giving Papi a headache. And your brother doesn't look happy, either."

Espie wouldn't have it. She screamed louder than before, clearly upset about something Leo couldn't provide.

Leo held back his own tears. Clearly he had taken after his father on the parenting front. One kid was hard enough to care for, but two!? Leo felt overwhelmed, like he was drowning in a sea of his daughter's tears, and he didn't know how to swim.

His life hadn't been easy before the twins. He'd just gotten out of his money issues, almost having his business going bankrupt at one point, and was finally starting to get some time to himself. He had a steady stream of customers, demigod and mortal (and the occasional monster). Life was good, even without him thinking of his old friends back in the Greek and Roman camps.

Then Apollo handed him these bouncing babies. As if not remembering who he'd spent five years of his life with in Europe wasn't bad enough, apparently the same girl had been Leo's baby mama. No matter what, Leo couldn't remember her, and every time he tried, his head split with pain. Hephaestus had said she had placed a spell on him, and that he wasn't allowed to remember right now.

Leo felt a sneeze coming on. He quickly placed Espie back in her crib, sneezed into a tissue (which he'd gotten off of the table in the room quickly), and groaned. Espie screamed bloody murder after Leo sneezed. Tulio was starting to whimper, which meant he wasn't far behind in upset-level.

Leo couldn't take it. He went to the hall and howled his own sad tune. Tears streamed down his face as he cried about his life. The orphan boy who ran away from his problems was now a single father of twins. He couldn't run away from this problem, no matter how much he wanted to. That would make him a hypocrite—abandoning his own children just as Aunt Rosa had done to him.

Why is life so unfair? I finally catch a break just to get shat on like this! I can't take this!

Leo cried himself to sleep in the hall, unable to hear his own daughter's continuous wails.

"Come on, Leo. Wake up."

Leo's eyes opened slowly. He still felt sick, and his fever had risen again. Baby cries echoed through the hall, originating from the nursery. Crouched beside him was a man with blonde hair and blue eyes. A stethoscope loosely hung from his neck, which kinda looked weird on a guy wearing a tank top with board shorts and flip flops.

Eventually, Leo made the connection. "Apollo," he spat. "Why are you here?"

Apollo produced a thermometer and stuck it in Leo's mouth. "One ten," he read with a whistle. "Not quite as high as your father gets when he gets a work fever, but still…"

"Work fever?"

"Yeah. Your family has a tendency to overheat when overworked. With you, you've only experienced the flames coming out. But in continuous high stress environments, the fire eats away at your immune systems."

The god stuck a hand in his pocket, pulling out a chunk of ambrosia. "Eat this."

Leo did as he was told. The sickness in him went away, and he felt a little better. But the cries of his daughter reminded him of the personal Hell he was in.

Apollo glanced behind him and sighed. "Yeah, that's the second reason I came. Now, I'm not supposed to interfere with mortal lives, but dammit, Leo! You're gonna run yourself into oblivion if you keep this up. And when that happens, Hephaestus will probably explode a volcano in anger. With my luck, he'll do it during the music awards, and I'll be damned before I let that happen."

Leo glared at the god. "It's not my fault that girl won't sleep or stop screaming! I've tried everything to shut her up!"

Apollo shook his head. "That's no way to talk about your daughter, Valdez."

Leo burst into tears. "I don't know what to do! I'm not cut out to be a father! I—I—" He choked and pulled his knees to his chest.

The god gave him a sympathetic look. "Okay. Let it out, Leo. It will do you no good to be upset when your babies are upset."

He gave Leo's back a pat as the son of Hephaestus sobbed quietly. Leo cried for a few minutes before finally taking a deep breath and looking at Apollo with puffy eyes.

Apollo gave a bright smile. "You good for now?" When Leo nodded, he continued: "Okay, so I'm here to suggest something. Come with me."

Leo stood and followed the god into the nursery. Espie was still screeching and flailing her arms about. Tulio was softly crying, not liking his sister's waving arms hitting him.

Apollo turned to Leo and yelled over the din, "The problem is that you're not providing Esperanza with something she's used to! Their mother always did something before putting the kids to sleep, and you aren't doing that."

Leo shook his head. "Two things. One: How was I supposed to know that if you didn't tell me? And two: what the Hades did she do?"

Apollo smiled again. He clapped his hands together and pulled them apart. A flash blinded Leo for a second. When he could see again, Leo looked at what Apollo was holding.

It was the Valdezinator.

"Still can't get it right," Apollo confessed. "But I'm willing to let you borrow it until you make a new one for your personal use."

He shoved the makeshift instrument into Leo's hands. "Their mother sang to them. Esperanza is used to hearing the tunes her mother sang before going to sleep. Play something for her."

"But…" Leo winced as Espie hit a particularly high, screeching note. "I can't remember who their mother is, let alone what she sang!"

Apollo patted his shoulder. "Dig deep, Leo. Close your eyes and start playing this Valdezinator of yours. Don't focus on anything—not even the tune. Imagine your baby girl smiling. Imagine your son laughing."

Leo did imagine that. Even in the sleepless weeks, there were still moments when Espie would give Leo a bright smile, one that melted his heart. Tulio's big eyes were always curious, especially when it came to whatever Leo was holding. It made him forget the nights filled with screaming, just for a moment.

Leo began turning the knobs and pulling the levers on the Valdezinator in his hands. He cranked out a tune that sounded like a lullaby. He could have sworn he'd heard it before, but the fog in his mind made him pause.

"Don't think about where you've heard it," Apollo said. "Music is about what you feel. Let your happiness guide your hands."

Leo's mind went blank once more, and he imagined seeing his babies for the first time in the house. They had been curious and wiggly, unable to do much except watch their father take them around. Their voices constantly babbled to get his attention, and he found his heart skip a beat every time he heard them.

The tune he cranked out droned on. Was it louder now? No, Espie had quieted down! She was gurgling happily, her arms swaying back and forth to the tune. Tulio was asleep once more, a smile present on his lips.

Eventually, the tune ended. Leo risked a glance at the crib.

There his twins lay, curled up next to each other. Both were asleep. Finally. Leo choked back a happy sob, hoping he wouldn't wake them up.

Apollo gave his head a pat. "Good job," he whispered. "You did it." The god frowned slightly. "I still can't get that thing to scratch out a bar, yet there you go with a full song. I'll get it, I swear."

Happy tears ran down Leo's cheeks. "That was all she needed?" he mumbled. "A bedtime song?"

"Of course," Apollo answered. "Lots of kids get a lullaby before bed. For some, it helps keep the bad dreams at bay if they subconsciously think of the happy song they heard before falling asleep."

Leo internally smacked himself. He couldn't sing, so it hadn't occurred to him that his kids had wanted a lullaby. Had he tried to sing, it probably would have sounded like a harpy screeching to them.

"I'm such an idiot," he said.

"No, you're a budding single father," Apollo corrected. "Every new parent makes mistakes. It's part of life. And by the way, you're a way better dad than Zeus, so that's already a plus in your favor."

Leo chuckled.

"I'll lend you that Valdezinator for a while," the god said. "Just give it back when you've made a new one."

"Got it."

Apollo dug through his board shorts and brought out a bag. "Oh, and this is from Hypnos. He says you're overdue."

"Overdue for what?"

Apollo emptied the bag's contents onto his hand. It was a pile of blue sand. Without answering Leo's question, the god blew the sand into Leo's face.

Leo drew back in alarm and coughed. "What—?"

Suddenly, his eyes became heavy. Apollo looked blurry. Everything began to sway. Leo's knees turned to jelly. He collapsed onto the floor of the nursery, curling up unconsciously at the foot of the crib.

Apollo sprinkled some blue sand onto the twins. "There. Now maybe Daddy can get some rest, huh?"

The god put the sand back into the bag and pocketed it. He looked at Leo, who was now asleep. "You'll get the hang of fatherhood, Leo. Good luck."

With that, the sun god disappeared, leaving the son of Hephaestus and his twins in the nursery. TF1 swooped down and curled around the Valdezinator, ready to hibernate until one of the Valdezes woke up.

A/N: Ah, Leo discovers how to make his babies sleep. The wonders of parenthood :)

Remember to tell me what you think, guys. Stay amazing!