A/N: This story was meant to be a summer project of mine after years of not uploading anything. This is my first Ace Attorney fanfic and probably my favourite story I've written so far. I've left Apollo and Athena's relationship ambiguous so that the reader can interpret it as they like. Feedback is appreciated!
It wasn't the first time Apollo had visited the Cosmos Space Center with Athena.
The two entered the building knowing it would be difficult for them to face again. A number of bad memories had taken place there, and so, to them, the Space Center had become a symbol of those unforgettable tragedies.
They had gone together once before on their investigation of the Clay Terran case. That ended with Apollo suspecting Athena of being his killer. The guilt still overcame him nearly every day, and despite his countless apologies and her constant reassurance that all was forgiven, he still couldn't shake off that feeling of remorse. After all, she never doubted him.
"Let's go check out the museum! There should be a few things on Mr. Starbuck's recent trip." Apollo didn't realize how troubled he must have looked for her to give him a sympathetic smile. How she managed to keep herself together with such ease was beyond him; maybe he should ask for one of those therapy sessions she loved to give in court.
It was Athena's idea to give the Space Center a visit in the first place. It was important to the both of them, it would be a shame to let the painful memories overshadow the precious ones. Memories of Apollo and Clay going there after school, meeting their childhood idol, and Clay expressing his dream to be an astronaut were replaced with Clay's murder and two people Apollo deeply cared about being accused of the crime. Athena's fondest memories were made in her mother's office just a few floors upstairs – befriending Simon, meeting Widget, and racing into the room thrilled that she had finally made friends with a classmate. Those were shattered by finding Metis's body, being attacked by her killer, and panicking when Simon took the blame to protect her. Needless to say, she didn't feel right associating such a valuable building to their hearts with the detrimental incidents that just so happened to take place there.
"This place is important to the both of us; I don't want to leave it behind. If we start coming here with a positive outlook, then our minds can detach those painful memories from the Space Center!"
Apollo wasn't sure if that was something Athena had learned while studying psychology or if it was just another a baseless assumption of her own, but Apollo had long learned that when she insisted on something, his objections were powerless.
He tried stepping into the museum with an open mind. Perhaps Athena was right – despite her unusual ideas, she knew what she was doing. At least she did most of the time. She had picked up on the uneasiness in his voice whenever the Space Center came up in conversation, and after experiencing her own hardships, told him that she couldn't allow him to keep it bottled up inside. She'd get him to either smash the bottle or change the contents himself.
"You know, I may have met Clay before." Athena was focusing on the photo taken a few days before the HAT-1 launch. "I believe I recognize him now that I see how he used to look. I don't think I've ever spoken to him, but I'm almost certain he's been in my mother's office."
Athena was trying so hard. The least Apollo could do was respond, but even that proved to be a challenge. So he simply nodded and hoped he wouldn't come off as apathetic.
He did care. He cared a lot; and that was the problem. Not only was he affected by Clay's case, but he was worried about Athena's condition. She had suffered panic attacks before, and while she claimed that she was over the UR-1 incident, Apollo couldn't help but be concerned for her mental health. She managed to save Simon, but emotional trauma wasn't something that could be cured.
Apollo made an effort to join Athena by looking into the glass featuring various mementos of different launches made over the years. He spotted a few that happened at the museum back when it was still a launch pad, a photograph including a younger Metis and Aura, and in a brand new display case, a photo of Clay and Starbuck the day before the HAT-2 launch was scheduled to happen. He spent a significant amount of time studying that one. Apollo had gone to wish them both luck that morning and told Clay of his promise to introduce Athena to him after his return from the trip.
Apollo was so wrapped up in his own thoughts that he found himself nearly leaping out of his skin when Athena called him over. "I found it! The display for Mr. Starbuck's latest trip is here," Athena exclaimed as she gestured for Apollo to stand next to her.
Apollo motioned further down the case, with a photograph of Starbuck with another, fairly older astronaut that Apollo had seen around the Space Center before as its newest addition. He was the one who joined Starbuck for the space trip. Apollo figured they probably wanted someone well-experienced to assist Starbuck should anything happen to his mental health once again. After a countless number of visits to the doctor and Starbuck learning to cut down on the truckloads of medication he had been prescribed, the crew had come to the conclusion that he was healthy enough to partake in the mission this time around.
"Hey, Athena." Apollo couldn't leave her to do all the work. Making the Space Center a happy place again was a team effort, right? "You would never believe how ecstatic Clay was when he first got that jacket. You know, the one for staff? He wore that thing night and day."
"No kidding." Athena cocked an eyebrow in response.
"If you think that's impressive, you should have seen how thrilled he was after the HAT-1 launch photo. That was the first picture he had taken with Mr. Starbuck, who, need I remind you, was his childhood hero. That thing was his most prized possession." Apollo crossed his arms and gave his signature grin that they both had missed so much. It's not that he never made it anymore, but it was so rare for them to be genuine.
Apollo and Athena made their way to the Boarding Lounge where Athena pointed at one of the tables along the wall. "Back when I was a kid, I used to make Simon play hide and seek with me around the Space Center." Apollo wondered why he could picture Athena still doing that. "It's a big place, yeah, but we knew it darn well enough. Underneath that table was one of my favourite places to hide, other than behind the display cases in the museum." She tugged on Widget, brows furrowing. "Now that I look at it, it wasn't all that great of a hiding spot, was it?" Apollo read the horror and sheer embarrassment off of her face.
"If it makes you feel better, Clay and I used to race here after school. I usually lost," Apollo chuckled in an attempt to lessen the mortification.
"That's because you don't train yourself." Athena crossed her arms and glared at Apollo, obviously holding that time he refused to run a 5k race with her against him. That was one of the few times Apollo ever succeeded in getting what he wanted when up against her, mostly because he promised to take Trucy shopping for new magic equipment. That was only after Athena had told him about the race, of course.
"What does that have to do with something that happened almost ten years ago?" Apollo sighed and dropped his shoulders as his expression turned agitated.
"You never trained yourself then, and still don't now. No wonder you're so out of shape!" Athena poked his chest, her scowl forming into a teasing grin.
Apollo sighed and crossed his arms. This is the thanks I get for trying to help?
"Then it's settled; I'll take you running with me the next morning we have a trial. That always gets me pumped!"
"But I like my chords of steel exercises," Apollo protested.
"Then we can make time for both."
The two continued to examine the room until Athena made a double-take at the spot where Clay had been found. Her face turning white, she yanked Apollo by the arm and brought him over to admire the giant screen.
"I used to have way too much fun with this." Apollo decided to pretend he didn't notice Athena frantically switching glances between the door, the screen, and him, finding a topic in desperation to keep him from getting upset. "The image would be switched every few months and I was always infatuated with each new one that was put up."
Apollo made an attempt to help her ease herself. "Didn't you like to draw? I take it you used the pictures up there as inspiration."
Athena placed her hands at her hips and grinned once more. "You bet I did. Always stormed into my mother's office to show off my latest masterpiece." She then removed one of her hands to fiddle with her earring, then upon remembering that it had been taken in as evidence for Clay's murder, awkwardly drew her hand downward to play with Widget once again. "I wonder if Simon still has any of them..."
The pair continued to wander around the Space Center, exchanging stories and lightening the atmosphere of the previously damaged environment for what could have been hours. They made a stop on the second floor to bring themselves back to sanity after laughing at another one of Apollo's stories about Clay.
Athena sat down on a nearby bench to calm herself from the amusement, wiping a tear from her eye. "Wow, who'd have thought he'd end up working here after that?"
She made room for Apollo to rest next to her as he allowed his mind to wander from that last comment. Clay did end up working there, but he didn't necessarily get what he wanted. He dreamed of travelling to space with Starbuck, they were preparing for the trip mere days before it was supposed to happen, but even a dream that close to coming true couldn't be achieved.
The reason Apollo didn't give up on law after his discouraging first trial was Clay himself, wasn't it? He was the one who motivated Apollo to keep pushing forward after the mess he was in. It was thanks to Clay that Apollo could accomplish his goals, and yet he wasn't able to meet his own.
It wasn't fair. Clay deserved to go to space.
Apollo found his breaths growing ragged as he tightened his grip, tilting his head downward. Athena looked at him with a troubled expression. She figured it would be best for her to place her hand on his shoulder. Words were not needed – she knew what was about to happen.
Apollo felt as if his chest was being crushed as he slumped forward, following it by him raising his hands to grip his head. He squeezed his eyes shut as he gathered the amazing amount of effort it took to finally speak.
"Clay... didn't deserve this. Clay was supposed to go to space." His voice wavering, he tried holding back the tears forming beneath his eyelids. "He deserved so, so much better."
Athena turned her body to face him completely and reached her other arm around Apollo to bring him into a calming embrace. She knew what he was going through, but she had long gotten through it. It was his turn to cry.
Apollo was still holding back what tears he could, and to this, Athena encouraged him to smash the bottle. "You can let it out now. It's okay." Apollo hugged her back as he finally allowed himself to weep. Athena rested a hand at the back of his head before gently stroking his hair, tightening her grip around him.
Apollo was now crying uncontrollably, allowing heavy sniffs to escape between violent sobs. He was certain Athena's shoulder must have been drenched by now, but she didn't seem to mind, her grasp urging him to continue. His breaths were short and even more ragged than before, and his lips trembled as he sucked in shaky breaths.
Apollo hadn't cried like this in a long time. It felt nice.
He had held it all in for so long, afraid of what people would think of him. He tried to stay strong for Clay, but that had only made his situation more unbearable. There was no need to hold back anymore.
Once Apollo's breathing slowed down and his grip loosened, he gently drew back, face still flushed. Athena pulled one hand back to his shoulder and dropped the other onto her lap. "How are you feeling?"
"Gross." Apollo sniffed, then gave her a warm smile.
Athena stifled a laugh. "That's always a good thing."
Apollo wiped a tear from his cheek. "I needed that cry. Thanks, Athena," Apollo said, voice stuffy. He took a deep breath and leaned back into the bench.
Athena smiled. "Don't sweat it." She then removed her hand from him and placed it in her pocket, revealing a tissue she had been keeping there. "You'll be fine." She then offered it to Apollo.
Apollo glowered at her with puffy eyes. "You were prepared for this?" he asked before blowing his nose.
"Letting your feelings out is the best way to get over emotional trauma. I figured you'd need it if things went well." Athena grinned. "I can tell it worked by the relief in your voice."
Apollo chuckled "I guess. And I admit your crazy 'changing the atmosphere' theory proved true as well." He straightened his back and stretched his muscles. Perhaps breaking the bottle and filling the contents of a new one could both work.
"I think that's enough nostalgia for one day." Athena stood up, placing her hands at her hips. "I'm starving. Why don't we go get lunch someplace?"
Apollo got out of his seat and gestured toward the elevator. "I know a good sandwich shop about ten minutes from here. How about it?"
Athena began walking toward the elevator, motioning for Apollo to follow her as she grinned once more. "My treat."