The gate's gears slowly ground, lifting it and opening up the village to the outside world, beyond the walls. It was a dreadful noise, even to those in the Survey Corps. Marnin's horse whinnied restlessly before they began to move out. Her heart was gripped in a nervous bear trap of fright and she could hear every beat as it raced; ba-dump, ba-dump, ba-dump! Almost like stampeding hooves, but much louder and far more intense.
The world beyond the gate was so wide and spacious; nothing for miles. It was much prettier than the cramped life inside the walls of the cage they were forced to hide behind, but Marnin didn't know if dying was really any better than living the life of a trapped bird. Death meant the end, but captivity- even fearful, uncertain captivity- still gave a glimmer of hope that there could be a way and at least of some safety. Bile rose in the back of her throat as she watched her section leader. Deep inside, she knew this was a mistake. She knew this mission would kill her. They were fools for leaving the walls. Her legs were completely numb as she pulled the reigns and squeezed her horse for it to hurry into a gallop at her leader's signal.
This is really it, she thought. Why did I ever join the military? What was I thinking joining the Survery Corps? What was I trying to prove? Her reluctant heart ached with regret. It took all herself from turning back. If she was going to die, she's rather die a hero than a coward.
She looked around at the other soldiers around her. They were all probably heading to their graves as well. Her friends would die just as soon as she did. Was life always so futile and pointless? To be given a life locked in a cage, cowering in fear of the beasts that roamed outside only to be released for a second before being mauled alive? She squeezed her eyes shut. I need to be strong. I need to be strong.
A signal flare soared high in the air in the distance; Titans. Marnin's heart leapt into her throat and she stared at it, reaching the clouds above. Suddenly, a cold darkness fell over her.
Her blue eyes widened and she dared to peer behind her. The smiling face of a Titan stared down at her, chasing after her and her team. Time seemed to slow as horror consumed her and her blood froze to ice. This is really it.
Tears raced down her face in rivers as she tried to pull her horse out of the Titan's reach. But its giant, quick hand grasped her body. She screamed as it squeezed her tightly, its rough, dry skin rubbing against her own. Her breaths came in heavy, constrained gasps and it lifted her up until they were face-to-face. Its eyes seemed to meet hers like it knew what it was doing, but cruelly didn't care. Time stopped and all Marnin could hear was the banging of her own heart against her fragile rib cage.
And it all came flooding back to her; precious memories of the past, soon to fade into nothingness. Her mind rushed past all of her most treasured memories and slowed at the painful ones and the ones she regretted. Even the night she joined the Survey Corps.
"Shinzou Wo Sasageyo!" Commander Erwin, the head of the Survey Corps, had said. "Give your hearts!" Under the stars, all the newest Survey Corps recruits had stood. There were only five, including Marnin, that had chosen to stay. The hundred others left to join the safer regiments, staying within the walls. Five fools who had saluted their commender, slamming their balled fists against their chests, against their quietly beating hearts. Five fools who would be lead into the same impending slughter that Marnin now faced.
She tried squirming to reach for her blade, but she couldn't reach it and her movement caused the Titan to strengthen its already suffocating grip. "Have mercy!" She gasped. "P-please, I beg of you." But her pleading was like begging water not to drown.
The Titan's mouth inched open wide, its nasty mouth giving Marnin a sight of her living tomb. Its teeth were red and mouth smelled of a thousand corpses. It was the last thing Marnin would ever smell.
She screamed as it dropped her inside its mouth and bit her in half. The squeezing, tightening pain of its teeth closing down on her was enough to make her pass out, but she wasn't dead yet. All was white, but soon it would all be black. She had given her heart, but what had it earned humanity? Nothing. Just another pair of lungs that would never breathe air again. Another heart never again to beat. Another casualty in light of all their efforts. And another martyr to give her heart for her cause.
A/N: This is probably one of the darkest things I've ever written, but I hope you liked it! I found this writing prompt in one of those '100+ Things to write about' books that said something like 'A soldier is about to embark upon a mission she knows will kill her' and this was the first thing to pop into my mind. Really hope you guys enjoyed, please leave a review- any feedback is welcome and greatly appreciated! :D