"I... I can't believe it... They exiled me..." Tak flew in a daze, not really paying attention to where she was going. Not that she really knew where she was going. They hadn't given her a navigation system. Just the most worthless functioning ship, and instructions to never show her face again.
The Almighty Tallest had sided with him... They had sided with that worthless, incompetent... She snarled and slammed her fists onto the sides of the console. Her race had betrayed her. How could they justify this? She had been set upon by two humans, who were vastly more capable and intelligent than Zim had reported, as well as the Irken failure himself. And they had condemned her for being defeated.
Zim had accomplished nothing! She had nearly destroyed their planet single handedly in a matter of weeks, and she was the one exiled? To hell with them! The Irken Empire can burn for all she cared. She'd find a new home... But where? Irkens were despised through most of the nearby galaxies. With good reason, she decided.
Earth. She had already been there once. She had an idea of what to expect. And, with any luck, maybe she could make an alliance with those two humans who had proven such competent rivals. The first thing to worry about was how to get there with no navigation. Understatement though it may be, the universe was a big place, and stumbling across something as relatively small as a planet was highly unlikely.
"Well, MiMi, think you can get us back there?" She asked the newly reassembled SIR unit. It's control center was still infected by the insanity of Zim's defective unit, but it should be able to navigate. Should. The unit sat up, looked around, then pointed. Tak closed her eyes, took a deep breath, then turned the ship to the indicated heading. "Here goes nothing."
-Line-
"This is not Earth, MiMi. This is not anywhere as far as I can tell!" Tak resited the urge to kick the useless robot she had once been so proud to have built. It would just hurt her foot and her pride. She looked around. Her helmet said the air was safe, so she removed it, breathing in the strange scent of this world.
She sighed and checked her fuel. Too low to make it to another planet. This hunk of dirt had been a long flight, even with an FTL drive. Might as well start walking. This place just became home. The two set off across the sandy surface of the planet, leaning into the occasional gust of wind.
It felt like days had passed. She looked around. The planet was rotating around its axis ad revolving around its sun in such a way that the orb of fire had remained above her the entire time. She sighed and sat down, pulling her knees to her chest and wondering if this was the end.
She had traveled for a full Earth year before finally making her way back to Irk after her failed takeover of the planet. Then, she had waited for another full Earth year for her hearing. And now she had just traveled for a full year to arrive on the wrong planet. Three years had passed on earth. Undoubtedly, Zim was as far from conquering it as ever.
She began drawing in the sand. The wind erased her work almost as fast as she traced her finger through the fine grains. She didn't notice the brush of cool metal under her fingertip until the second loop around. She glanced down at her hand in confusion and began brushing the sand away. She found a strange container, consisting of a pot, with a handle on one end and a long spout on the other. She tipped it and was unsurprised to find it empty.
She tossed it aside, then laid down. It was exhausting, walking in the barren, uniform desert. The sun never moved. The surroundings never changed. She could have been walking in very small circles, and never know it. She thought back to an old story she had been implanted with when she received her PAK. It was from one of the more peaceful planets they had conquered and laid waste too.
It told about a man who found a lamp, and upon polishing it off, found a magical, wish-ranting djinn inside. Tak sat up again, and picked up the strange artifact again. Could this be a lamp? She hesitantly brushed her uniform sleave across it. Nothing. Of course not. What sort of riddiculous story was that anyway? Rubbing it wouldn't let anything out. If anything, you would have to remove the lid. She tossed it again, this time at MiMi.
The lid of the relic sprung free on impact. Tak's eyes grew wide as she watched a dark grey mist begin to pour from the vessel. It expanded and began to take shape. It could have been anything, really, but she knew it must be a djinn. The universe was finally giving her a break. She would finally be repaid for all the despair she had suffered.
The shadowy figure seemed to stretch, then two glowing red orbs appeared. Eyes, floating like burning coals amongst the shadows. A rumbling voice sounded around her. It was unnerving. She scooted back slightly and looked up at the creature.
"You have freed me from my prison. For that I thank you. I have been forced to endure in this life for many millions of years, and I can finally go to my rest. Before I depart, tell me what you desire most, and I will make it true." The spirit like form sounded tired, and as old as time itself. She looked down and thought about it. What did she want most?
She looked up at the creature and tried to put what she felt into words. Not something that was taught in Irken military camps.
"It is an honor to have been able to help you. What I want most in the world now is a home. A new life on a world far away. One earth. I want to belong and be accepted for once in my life. I want a chance at a happy life." Tak held the gaze of the shadow as it seemed to think over her words. Then it began to fade. At first she thought it was simply abandoning her, but then she heard its voice, fading quickly, whispering into her ears.
"I have looked into your heart, and I see what I must do. I can not give you the happiness you desire, but I can give you the opportunity to find it for yourself. Good luck, Tak of Irk." The voice and the shadow finally disappeared completely, and she was about to rise to her feet when her vision began to blur. She didn't have time to call for MiMi before she lost consciousness.
-Line-
"Hmmm? Where am I?!" Tak sat up and looked around wildly. She felt strange. But that was nothing compared to what she saw. Two humans looked down at her. One, a boy with glasses and black hair, the other, a girl with purple locks and beeping machine in her hands.
"I never thought we would see you again, alien scum!" Dib said as he pointed down at her, accusingly. Gaz raised an eyebrow and punched him. "What was that for?"
"You're loud." The gamer girl turned her attention back to the Irken on the sofa. "Why did ou bother with the hologram when we both know what you are?" That caught Tak by surprise. She looked down, and sure enough, she was perfectly indistinguishable from a human female. She sighed and reached to deactivate the hologram.
Then she began to panic. Her PAK was missing. Without that, she would die in a matter of minutes! She began to pant and looked around wildly. Where could it have gone? She would have remembered removing it! But... she didn't even remember how she got here. Last she recalled, she had been on a desert planet off in the far reaches of the universe.
The shadow thing! It must have sent her here like she had wanted! But did it not know she would die without her PAK? "How long was I asleep?!" She might only have seconds left!
"About half an hour. We found you outside when we came back from school. You were laying face down in the bushes. We brought you in before Zim saw you and started an incident. Your robot is in the garage." Gaz was playing her game while she spoke, her eyes never leaving the screen.
Half an hour? That didn't make sense... She should be long dead... She reached up to toy with the end of her antennae. A nervous habit of hers. She couldn't find it. Even in the hologram, she should be able to touch her true form. All she felt was... Hair. She tugged a lock of blue into her line of sight and tugged on it. It stung slightly. It was real.
She began to pant. She was... She was... Human. She was a human. She was no longer an Irken. She was one of these creatures... She fainted, for the first and last time in her life.
-Line-
"About time." Gaz paused her game and set it down to look directly at Tak. It unnerved the former invader to see the girl devote her full attention to something besides that game. Last time she had done that, it had been the end of her SIR unit, and her take over of the planet.
"I'm a human..." Tak mumbled, at a loss for what to do or say.
"Yeah, Dib already determined that. What happened?" It was the first time the cynical girl had ever sounded legitimately curious. It was the first time anyone had ever shown an interest in what Tak had gone through.
It took hours for Tak to say everything that was on her mind. It felt amazing to finally be able to share her story with someone. Someone who had asked, and truly wanted to know. Someone who wasn't robotic or imaginary or herself. She felt... relieved. Not long after she finished, Dib returned carrying two large sacs of food.
"Oh, you're up. I brought food." Dib seemed unsure of what to do. He was an expert on aliens. When it came to dealing with humans, he was lost. Tak blinked and smelled the food. If she was still Irken, the meat would kill her if she ingested it. But not anymore. Now, she could survive the trials of this planet as well as any human.
They ate, speaking rarely, as Tak had already shared her story with Gaz, and Gaz prefered silence anyways. Dib dared not annoy either woman with his rantings. After the food was gone, Dib excused himself to his lab. Gaz took a seat beside there guest and sighed.
"You'll need a place to stay. Dad won't notice if he is feeding one more mouth he never sees. We have plenty of room." It was an invitation. A home. Somewhere to live. With the first non-Irken individual she had ever felt respect for. She smiled and nodded. She could have sworn she saw the corner of Gaz's mouth twitch upward at the movement, but then she was up and leading the way to the room that she would be staying in.
Dib returned an hour later looking puzzled.
"I was going to falsify the records to make you a student at Hy Skool, but it turns out you're already registered. How is that possible?" Tak smiled, then laughed. Not an evil cackle, but an actual laugh of joy. The djinn had thought of everything. She was a part of this world now.
-Line-
"YOU!" Zim screached as he stood on her desk, pointing at her with all the authority of an enraged chihuahua. She raised an eyebrow and kept her face straight. She didn't let her rage leak through, nore her amusement at his displeasure.
"Me?" She decided that playing dumb might be the way to go for now. After all, one scan would tell the idiot she was a human, through and through. It seemed that thought occurred to him at the same moment, as he pulled a pair of enhanced goggles from his PAK and looked her over once. His face registered confusion, then disgust.
"Just another filthy, pathetic, smelly human." Zim hopped off her desk and took his seat, occasionally shooting her suspicious glances. It was mildly satisfying, seeing him truly and completely at a loss for what to make of the situation. His usual undeserved arrogance couldn't keep up with the conflicting data his eyes were sending him.
Class passed by in a blur. To her surprise, Tak didn't feel like she was behind. Had she been implanted with all the knowledge she should have gathered up to this point? She was on record as being almost fifteen years old, and a freshmen. And, to her great joy, she was taller than Zim. She was right at eye level with Gaz, and slightly shorter than Dib. But to be taller than that insufferable Zim was something she would enjoy for a very long time.
When the day came to an end, she found Gaz waiting impatiently for her and Dib. As soon as Zim saw the three of them start off together, he flipped. Dib took the opportunity to take off after his nemisis, and Tak found herself less compelled to give chase, than to simply walk side by side with the silent girl.
Gaz, as near as she could tell, seemed to be happy about the decisions of her two companions. When Dib had left, her frown lessened. When Tak relaxed and remained in step beside her, she nearly smiled. Nearly.
Over the next few weeks, Tak found that her knowledge had distinct holes, that usually required asking Gaz to explain something awkward to her. Such as when she awoke one morning and discovered that her insides were in significant discomfort and she was bleeding from her... Well Gaz had not been able to look her in the eyes for the rest of the day.
As annoyed as she was that she had to take the bad with the good, she still didn't mind the transformation. All in all, she had grown more fond of the human race than she ever had been of her own. Sure, they had their problems, but they also had so much potential. Once you learned to look deeper than their flaws, they really were incredible. Especially Gaz.
"What's on your mind today, Tak?" The girl asked as she walked, her eyes on the screen, but her feet never stumbling.
"I... was wondering... what is 'kissing'?" Dib, who had been staring off into space, probably contemplating how best to combat the next attempt Zim would make to conquer the planet, nearly fell on his face as his legs stopped moving. Gaz even looked up from her game, though her thumbs never stopped.
"Kissing is... something humans do to show affection. They press their lips against someone else. It is supposed to feel pleasant." Gaz sounded like a dictionary. Tak thought that Gaz must have never engaged in this activity before, and then blushed when she realized that thought made her happy.
"So they press their lips against someone else's lips? That seems pointless. And unsanitary." Tak contemplated the action. Two humans pressing their faces together for pleasure? Absurd.
"It isn't always the other person's lips. It depends. Friends and relatives usually only kiss each other on the cheek or something. Only romantic couples kiss each other on the lips, or in more... intimate ways." Gaz was blushing slightly now, and had her eyes back on the screen.
"Intimate..." Tak considered what she knew of human intimacy. She only had bits and pieces, but from what she had gathered, it was roughly the same as Irken mating. Except that Irkens had not reproduced by mating for several millennium. In fact, Irkens didn't really have a use for displays of affection, since they didn't feel affection. Not unless they were defective, then they usually didn't live that long.
"Well you see, Tak, it goes like this..." Dib was cut off mid sentence as Gaz held a finger up to his face.
"If you feed her any garbage you learned off of a paranormal website, I will end you." Dib closed his mouth and walked on in silence. Tak soon became lost in thought. In theory, she vaguely understood what kissing was supposed to be now. But she didn't have enough data to determine anything relevant.
"Could I kiss you, Gaz?" This time Dib did fall. His eyes were wide and his mouth hung open in shock. Gaz had stopped walking and her eyes were fully opened, observing her friend intently, as if trying to determine whether she was serious or not. Finally, she closed her game and nodded once. Dib's mouth worked like a fish out of water as his crush stepped forward and pressed her lips against those of his sister.
Meanwhile, completely ignorant of the boy whose brain was on the verge of complete nuclear meltdown, Tak decided this human custom was indeed "pleasant". Gaz would never admit to it in public, but she couldn't have imagined a better first kiss if she tried.
-Line-
So, my first Invader Zim fic. I like Tak and Gaz, but I didn't want to do anything interspeicies. I hope no one hates me for turning her into a human. I hope to continue this, but it is not a priority, so don't be surprised if it takes a while. I will at the very least write an ending for it at some point!