DISCLAIMER: Hello fellow readers, I figured on doing my own commentary on this horrible fanfic that is pretty much well known. I do not own the Harry Potter series and I think that Tara Gillespie should delete her profiles but also go back to school.
Chapter 1.
AN: Special fangz (get it, coz Im goffik)(No one freaking cares if you're gothic because frankly you do not know what the term means.)2 my gf (ew not in that way)(What is with the texting. Are you texting your girlfriend?)raven, bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling. U rok! (-adds Raven or Tara to my hatred list-)Justin(Beiber? Shit no wonder you act like a wannabe.)ur da luv of my deprzzing life u rok 2!(Jeez, no one needs to know you have a bad is Fanfiction for crying out loud!)MCR ROX!(Um...okay...-_-)
Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way(Dementia is a disorder or a mental illness, you blasting idiot.)and I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got my name)(No shit,sherlock.)with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back(Like I could even care on your hair.)and icy blue eyes like limpid tears(Limpid? So your eye color is clear?)and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don't know who she is get da hell out of here!).(Fangirl moment for you, of all,no one looks exactly like Amy Lee or any other singer.)I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he's a major fucking hottie.(Sicko also incest.) I'm a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. (Wooooooowwwwwww.) I have pale white skin. (Don't care.) I'm also a witch, and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England (Scotland, not England. Jo actually wrote Scotland in the book series.) where I'm in the seventh year (I'm seventeen).(Um..basically you start off as a sixteen year old and you TURN 17.) I'm a goth (in case you couldn't tell) (NO SHIT!YOU STATED THAT AT THE BEGINNING YOU MORON!) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots.(No one needs to know your fashion sense,wannabe.) I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation(Aren't you already pale and a vampire?), black eyeliner and red eye shadow. (NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR MAKEUP,YOU BIMBO!) I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining(Do you mean the term sleeting?) so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them. (I am flipping you off because you are a wannabe thinking she is a goth.)
"Hey Ebony!" shouted a voice. (A voice .) I looked up. It was…. Draco Malfoy! (Draco, run for your bloody life! This incest girl is trying to rape you!)
"What's up Draco?" I asked.
"Nothing." he said shyly. (Draco Malfoy does not say anything in the terms of shyly or shy.)
But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away. (Oh yay!Although you did not introduce them earlier. Did you ever go to English class at all?)
AN: IS it good? (NOPE!) PLZ tell me fangz! (Just horrible.)
A/N: So, why I am doing this awesome commentary? Well, I wanted to do something different for once in a while. Hehe. Anyways, I may post a story up that is the well-written version of this one and maybe Ebony can go to a mental institution or something. Anyways give me some ideas on what you want me to write.
-DramiWriter.