Disclamer: I don't own Criminal Minds or the characters, nor do I make money writing these fics
Summary: They're all broken; healing comes through friendship, with time.
A/N: This is my first Criminal Minds fic. I've been a fan of the show for years, but only recently started watching it from the beginning (thank goodness for a library card and DVDs). I haven't been this into a show (or inspired to write fan fic) since my obsession with Stargate SG-1 and Stargate Atlantis. It feels good to be back to writing!
~The greatest healing therapy is friendship and love~ Hubert H. Humprhey
This case had been an especially difficult one for the team, JJ mused, glancing around the cozy bar at her teammates – her family. The unsub had been targeting little boys the same age as Jack, and this closed to the anniversary of Haley's death, it had almost been too much for them to bear.
But her family was strong, and they'd held each other up, apprehending the unsub just in time to stop a fourth murder. The poor little boy had a long, hard road of healing ahead of him, but just like this team, he had family to see him through it.
JJ took a long drink of her beer and watched her friends a little more closely. Each one so unique, right down to their chosen coping methods.
She watched as Rossi sat at the bar, a glass of amber liquid in his hand, a woman closer to JJ's age than his unabashedly flirting with him. There was little doubt where Dave would seek solace and comfort tonight, JJ thought with a smirk.
Her gaze slid to Reid, beer long forgotten as he spoke quickly, gesturing wildly, undoubtedly regaling the growing crowd with some obscure facts about why pick-up lines work, no matter how cheesy they are. He was completely oblivious to the no less than five women who slid him their numbers. Facts and figures brought Spence comfort – unchanging in a world wrought with chaos.
JJ turned her attention to Garcia. True to form, she was perched on a stool, fruity umbrella drink clutched in both hands as she watched the crowd – or more specifically one Derek Morgan – bumping and grinding to the bass-laden music. The images that came across their desks affected Penelope Garcia more profoundly than the rest of them, but she put them in boxes and hid them under online gaming, graphic novels or whatever else it was Garcia did in their down time. JJ grinned as Garcia whistled long and low at Morgan, who winked at her with a shrug.
Morgan was in his glory, surrounded by gorgeous women, dancing his frustrations away. He would leave that dance floor with his pockets full of phone numbers and his cheeks stained with lipstick. He might call one or two of these women of the course of the next few weeks, but it would never become anything more than a fling. Derek knew all too well how the job could destroy those who didn't understand it and couldn't justify exposing anyone to that danger. He had watched it tear Hotch's marriage and family apart and wasn't interested in sharing that experience. He would keep on finding comfort in chance encounters and witty banter with Garcia.
JJ looked across the table at Hotch. Stoic as always, the shadows in Aaron Hotchner's eyes brought tears to JJ's. Hotch was the job, always had been, and as such had lost almost everything to it. His stoicism had served well to protect him for years; he had built walls that he'd been sure would keep him and his family safe – even after the divorce. The events of that fateful day a year ago had brought those walls crashing down, obliterating their illusion of safety and security. The past few days, even knowing Jack was safe, had nearly destroyed him.
Now, beer forgotten in front of him, Hotch stared, unseeing, ahead, lost in memories that would haunt him for the rest of his life. JJ sighed, wishing there was some way to bring some comfort to her friend, when it happened. It was subtle, and fleeting, but for a split second, the shadows cleared and a light came to Hotch's eyes again.
JJ turned to follow his gaze and let out a quiet chuckle when it led right to Emily Prentiss.
Prentiss was on the dance floor with Morgan, ignoring the men around her and simply enjoying the pulse of the music. She'd one confessed to JJ and Garcia that the only thing more soothing to her soul than a good bass line was hot, angry sex. Judging from the way she was dancing with Morgan, JJ was pretty sure Prentiss hadn't had the latter recently. Or hadn't deemed any of the men vying for her attention as worthy.
Now that she thought of it, JJ realized that Prentiss hadn't found anyone worthy in quite some time…at least two years now.
JJ looked back at Hotch, noting that he kept his eyes on Emily over the rim of his mug as he took a long drink. It was almost like he couldn't pull his gaze from her. JJ took another sip of beer to hide her smirk and sat back to watch things unfold.
On the dance floor, Prentiss laughed as Morgan pulled her tightly into him. It was a game they'd been playing for years and it never ceased to amuse her. Morgan would pull her in, helping her avoid any unwanted advances (and for the past two years they were all unwanted) and driving the women fighting for prime dancing space with Morgan crazy. It typically resulted in Morgan going home with the most persistent and Prentiss going home alone, which suited her just fine.
JJ and Garcia had given up questioning her about their game, although Garcia still wondered, out loud and often, how Prentiss could wrap herself around that gorgeous chocolate god and not leave the bar more wound up and frustrated than when she arrived. Prentiss simply smiled and said the music loosened her up and that was all she needed.
Her friends didn't believe her.
Hotch watched Morgan pull Prentiss close, took in the long lines of her neck as she threw her head back and laughed. He envied their closeness – not the psychical closeness, but the emotional connection they had that allowed them to wrap themselves around each other with such abandon.
He had never been so free with anyone – not since the early years with Haley. There wasn't a day that went by, even now, that he didn't think about Haley and the promise he made to her just before she died.
A promise he hadn't really kept.
He told Jack the stories of his mom, of how they met. He showed Jack unwavering and unconditional love. But he hadn't loved openly or freely. He continued to be guarded, to try to protect his heart. Not to care too much, because it always lead to being hurt again.
And it was slowly killing him inside.
JJ turned, wanting to say something comforting to Hotch, as he stood up, empty mug in hand. He gave JJ a small nod and headed to the bar for another beer. JJ was about to stand up and join him when she saw Prentiss untangle herself from Morgan and head toward Hotch. JJ walked over to Garcia and gave her a nudge, nodding Hotch's direction. They had been waiting for something to happen for years and it looked like Hotch was finally going to find a new, more effective coping mechanism.
They watched as Hotch ordered himself a second beer, and as Prentiss talked him into doing a shot. JJ grimaced slightly on his behalf as she watched them shoot back the tequila; it had never been her favorite and she always hated when it was Prentiss's turn to buy the round. JJ's blue eyes widened as Prentiss took her beer in one hand, Hotch's hand in the other, and led him out to where she had left Morgan.
"Uh, Jayje?" Garcia squeaked. "What's she thinking? Hotch hasn't danced since – "her voice trailed, cracking as she added "well, since Haley."
"I know. But maybe she's onto something. It's well past time for him stop blaming himself, to cut himself some slack. He's been about the job and Jack for so long that he's starting to shut us all out. It's time to remind him that he can't." JJ pulled Garcia from her bar stool and dragged her out to the dance floor.
Prentiss turned toward Hotch and put her hand at his hip, pulling him into her just as Morgan had done to her earlier, drawing a chuckle from him. She grinned at the sound, causing JJ and Garcia to exchange a "ha! We knew it!" look.
JJ thought back to the various girls' nights they'd spent dishing on the men in their lives – recalling just how Emily's face would flush at the mention of Hotch's name. How she would grudgingly agree with Garcia's opinion of Morgan's godlike stature, only to follow up with a declaration of her attraction to subtle strength and the appeal of the strong, silent type.
JJ and Garcia had known for years that Hotch was the reason Emily always clung to Morgan on the dance floor and went home alone.
It was no surprise, really, that she was finally doing something about it.
The real surprise was that not only was Hotch letting her, he was clearly enjoying himself! That was a twist neither woman saw coming.
Prentiss's heart raced as she leaned into Hotch, the thudding of the bass pushing her on. She could always blame the tequila later, but right now she didn't care. She was tired of watching Hotch sink deeper and deeper into the darkness. He'd been pulling away from them this past year and if he wasn't careful, he'd pull away from Jack, too. And she wasn't about to sit idly by and watch him lose everything.
It was time for Aaron Hotchner to find a new, more productive way to cope. And God help her, she wasn't backing down until he did.
Hotch could feel Prentiss's hand on his hip, burning warm through his shirt. It had been years since he'd been on the dance floor, felt the soft curves of a woman pressed against him. He had been keeping everyone at an arm's length, believing that doing so would keep him from losing what little he had left. It had become his coping mechanism and it was slowly draining him. He was starting to think that Prentiss and Morgan were onto something, letting go and getting close. Seeking comfort from one another, not isolating themselves.
He handed his beer off to JJ, taking Prentiss's and passing it off, too. Hands on her hips, he pulled her in close again, reveling in the feel of her, soft and warm, melting into him. Even in the fog he'd been walking through this past year, she hadn't gone unnoticed by him. He'd stood on regulations and fraternization rules, telling himself it was the right thing to do for their careers; going on the belief that he was protecting them both. Now, holding her, dancing with her, he couldn't remember why he'd waited so long to let her in.
The thought crossed his mind that this probably wasn't the best coping mechanism, but he figured he could always blame the tequila later.
For now, he was going to enjoy being close, not just physically, but emotionally too, to his team. His family. All broken, all healing. And doing it all together, holding each other up.
JJ met Hotch's eye and grinned. It had been a long time coming, but she couldn't have been more thrilled that her friends were finally beginning to heal; finally coming together. Hotch raised an eyebrow at her, flushing slightly before dipping his head down say something in Prentiss's ear. JJ's grin widened as Prentiss threw her head back and laughed, a flush to match Hotch's spreading across her cheeks.
This last case had been hard; this past year had been all but unbearable. But the fog was lifting, they were moving on. And were coming back stronger than ever. Of that, JJ could be absolutely sure.