Authours Note: Yeah I know I know I haven't updated my other story, but oh well (: this is just a little oneshot I felt like writing. It takes place the night after the premier, ie: when Paige freaks out about one thousand times in just one day. Enjoy :D
It wasn't wrong. It wasn't right. It wasn't bad and it wasn't good, but it was a start.
"Nighty night then!" Only she could pull that off.
"It meant nothing, she means nothing." And only she could've hurt me so badly.
"But right now," and also, "you're pretty much everything," she was the only one that could mend me.
So here I am lying under a tree a few feet from her house, looking at her window knowing perfectly well by the occasional slim silhouette cast on the curtains that she's there. She might see me and she might not, but at the moment I'm not sure what even my subconscious is hoping for. There's a dull pain in my chest I can't place and I have a mild headache on the brink of annoyance. Why am I here? I can't even pull up a response to my own questions. Everything's numb and I've no idea why.
It could have been my comprehension that Chad is just like Jay. It could have been my understanding that my Mom wants that life for me, too. But most importantly, it could have been the moment I realized while Paige twirled my hair and giggled earlier this evening in my sad excuse of an apartment hallway that I didn't have those blinders on anymore and I would truly leave those very small shoes unfilled.
And that's the part that doesn't want Paige to see me. The part that says just because we're close friends, doesn't mean I can already dump something so heavy on her.
Having closed my eyes lazily earlier they now twitch slowly open at the sound of a latch and squeak. Her gasp is enough to make a small smile form on my face as I look up at her. A hand covering her slightly open mouth, eyes wide and soft green, blonde hair cascading down the length of her arm and whipping lazily about her features, a baby blue tank top and yellow soffes with all of her make-up gone. Just the way I like her.
"Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your long hair." I mumbled good naturedly to make her loosen up. My speaking must have awoken her from her trance as she quickly scurried down the stairs, out the front door, and kneeling next to my pathetic form. I sat up just enough to lean against the tree and be eye-level with her. She looked completely terrified, so much so that it rubbed off on me.
"Paige, don't look like that. I'm alright. I just didn't know where to go." I muttered the end without even meaning to and she immediately grabbed at me practically yanking me through her house until her door was shut and I was sitting on her bed. How she did all of that without both of us tripping, I'll never know.
"Hmm, well now, doesn't this feel familiar? Last night déjà vu? Come on, cutie! Grab a damp cloth, place it at my elbow, and press your lips to mine!" I said all of this with a light tone which made her smirk.
"Funny. No more freak outs, though. Or at least…" her expression turned solemn as she edged closer to me, "none on my part." It wasn't a sexual innuendo; it was a question of why I, Alex Nunez, was waiting for nothing under Paige Michalchuk's tree at 10 o'clock at night. I shrugged uncomfortably and looked at a very interesting piece of loose string from her comforter I had been fidgeting with. I felt her body shift right in front of me as she delicately ran her hands through my hair, pulling my head closer to rest on her trim stomach. I relaxed into the touches immediately and felt my nerves unraveling with each passing second. She continued her ministrations as she asked, "Lexi, what's wrong?" I inhaled deeply, catching her scent and as I exhaled I snuggled further into her, pulling my hands up to run very light, very timid circles on her lower thighs. Much to my appreciation she didn't even flinch.
"Paige…" I whispered. She kissed the top of my head and I could tell she was worried by the way her fingers were raking through my tussled black locks.
"I'm not really sure what's wrong, but I know something is." As soon as I said that I realized how it must have sounded. Her fingers paused for a brief moment and then shakily started again more cautiously then before.
"No, Paige, it has nothing bad to do with you. With us. I mean, if there is an us…wait, is there an us?" I was quieted by her breathy laughter as she wrapped her arms around me and held me close to her form.
"Sweetie, there's an us." We let our hands lightly rub soothingly over each others backs as some sort of confirmation. After a few moments I moved to speak again, which caused us to go back to our previous antics.
"Well before this moment we're having right now, I felt this kind of hollow, hurtful blankness in my chest. It might have been Jay, it might have been Chad, it might have been my Mom. I'm not sure. But whenever I feel like that, I let myself walk. And my feet led me straight to you. And now all of that is…kind of gone. I feel good again. Do you feel good?" I asked leaning my head back and looking into her glossy eyes.
"Mhm. I do feel good. I love when I'm with you." At that moment something came over me. Something completely out of character and unannounced: honesty.
"Paige when you smile the world makes sense, and when I kiss you I feel like I might cry." She wore a permanent glare on her features with a playful undertone. I was praying my gut was correct and she enjoyed what I had said, but I wasn't sure. Suddenly she leant in and before I could comprehend fully what was going on, her lips were against mine in a deep, meaningful kiss. My mind swirled with confusion at just how many emotions I couldn't label were swimming in my sternum. She felt it too; it was like she was proving it to me. Her hands remained on my face, lightly pulling me closer to her as my own were in midair floating between us as if they had got caught in the middle of something perfect that stunned them into immobility. When we pulled away I noticed there were very small pools on the corners of her eyes. She laughed a little and wiped the side of my cheek where apparently a tear had stained my face. We smiled knowingly at one another for a while before she cuddled up into an almost-perfect ball in my lap. Clapping her hands her lights went off and I could not help the loud laugh that followed.
"Paige, you WOULD have a clapper, you princess!" She swatted at my head playfully while reaching across the bed to grab at the remote.
"Oh, shut up, you." She replied as she flicked through random TV channels. I kissed her shoulder a few times, noting the certain areas that made her shiver. She gave a satisfied smile as she went to turn off the lamp, leaving it on some French movie with subtitles. I looked at the screen with a confused expression which made her giggle and pull me in for a few light kisses.
"Your confused face? Is adorable. Keep up the good work." She said with a playful tap to my nose. I smiled and gave her a long bashful kiss in return.
"Ok." I whispered shyly and she squealed with what I'm assuming was excitement. This girl is so beautiful.
"I like falling asleep to French. It's calming, you know?" I nodded even though the thought had never even crossed my mind. She gave me a few last pecks on the lips as she wrapped her arms around me comfortably and yawned.
"Goodnight Lexi. Sweet dreams." With the blueish glow on her figure it was impossible not to touch her, and as I watched the minutes pass and her smile fade into deep, rhythmic breathing I whispered, "Goodnight, my guardian angel."