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Twilight belongs to Stephanie Meyer, all characters listed below belong to Stephanie Meyer.
Bella POV
The moment I cut my finger I knew I was in deep shit.
Short of Carlisle, I knew that every vampire in that room quite possibly could become overwhelmed with bloodlust and take me out in a fraction of a second.
Sadly enough at that moment the vampire I was the most afraid of was Edward….
I knew that he loved me, as I did him but I also knew that my blood was like his own personal version of heroine… as he so eloquently put it in the beginning of our relationship.
I didn't want to believe that he could kill me, or rather that he would kill me but in that moment I knew it was a definite possibility.
Then as Jasper lunged towards me my fears became all too real. Not so much because he was mid-attack, but because I couldn't help but realize that if he was so overwhelmed with bloodlust that he would go as far to attack me that everyone in that room must be feeling extreme bloodlust. Therefore it amplifying for Jasper.
My heart immediately went out to him, I felt so sorry that he was going to take the blame for whatever may happen.
But then he was stopped, but not before Edward decided it would be a good idea to throw me into a table under the pretense of protecting me from Jasper.
Once Jasper was taken outside and I was getting stitched up by Carlisle I felt livid that once again Edward had taken things into his own hands, and as a result I would now have another scar on my already imperfect body.
Edward and mines relationship had been perfect, almost too perfect to the untrained eye. Like I said before, we both loved each other that much I knew but sometimes I seriously doubted whether I was his mate or not.
He just acted like I was a possession most of the time which of course caused me to be somewhat bitter at times. Sometime I wished that his possessive behavior would lead to a more physical relationship, but no, nothing beyond kissing for me and him. I wanted to badly to fuck him and yet he just didn't allow it. I knew that he had his worries of hurting me and I got that, I did. But I really wished that he would just live a little and have some fun. Preferably with me… in my bed.
When I talked to Alice about these feelings she just said that he was scared because I was such a fragile human.
Thanks Alice.
She also said that he was for sure my mate, and I his. That his over protectiveness could also be contributed to him simply guarding his mate.
In my mind though I wondered if he simply was just acting possessive.
I never got the chance to talk to Edward about these things because he left me.
Alone.
In the woods.
Crying.
Calling after him.
I would never forgive him for what he had done to me that day.
Though he said he would never be around again, I still planned to hold that grudge because I whole heartedly thought he deserved for someone to truly be disappointed in him.
Because he sure as hell was the apple of the Cullen parents eyes.
When he told me that he didn't care for me I knew that he had finally had enough of me, enough of being with his fragile human pet. I couldn't blame him I suppose.
Yet I still was angry that the entire family moved. I just couldn't comprehend why they all would leave without so much as a goodbye. I may have been Edwards little pet but I thought that I might be more to the rest of them. Apparently not.
Once I found my way home from the journey in the woods that night, my father was of course wearing a hole in the linoleum of the kitchen due to his frantic pacing. I assured him that I just got lost while on my walk and that I was simply going to go get cleaned up and go to bed.
As soon as I hit the shower tears flowed….
Though Edward did wrong by me, or at least I felt he did… i missed him. I longed for his companionship. I knew that night I wouldn't be able to sleep a wink… and possibly for several nights after. I knew that without his cold embrace to soothe me into a deep slumber I would simply lay there counting fucking sheep.
Thanks Edward….. I thought bitterly as I lay down in my bed.
After tossing and turning for what felt like hours I finally willed myself to close my eyes and stay still.
I started thinking of Jasper and how I was sure he was going to get blamed for what took place that night. I felt so strongly that it almost scared me that it wasn't his fault.. Not only was it in his nature, but he had the entire whammy of everyone elses thirst thrown upon him in that moment.
I wished that I could just talk to him and give him a hug and tell him that I didn't blame him for his near attack. I'm sure I would've done the same thing….. that I still thought of him as a friend. That he was worth it… I wasn't sure what "it" was at that moment, yet I wanted to tell him so badly it made my chest ache.
Too bad they all left…. I thought to myself as I slipped into a restless sleep.