M*A*S*H on MASH
A/N: What if MASH was actually based on a true story? In this story there really was a MASH 4077th and MASH franchise is based on their lives. The characters and their families discuss the book, movie and TV show MASH.
The MASH franchise in this story only exists in the universe I created. No disrespect is intended toward the more talented directors, screenwriters and the author of the original book.
Some Characters like Hawkeye's mother and sister appeared in my other MASH stories.
I only own the rights to the original characters. Fox owns the rest.
Dr. Nathanial Pierce
Crabapple Cove Maine
My name is Nathanial "Natty" Pierce. My father was Captain Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce Chief Surgeon of the MASH 4077th and my Mother is the former Major Margaret "Hot lips" Houlihan head nurse.
My father passed away in 1997. My mother is still alive and well and continues to live in Crabapple Cove. After my father retired in the eighties I took over his practice in town. My younger brother Daniel is a retired Army officer and our youngest sister Cora is a registered nurse in Boston.
MASH has dominated our entire life. Dad loved the television series. Mom didn't really care the movie or series but enjoyed the book. She never gives interviews about MASH. She hates Alan Alda saying "he reminds me of your father's bad habits. She does however talk to Loretta Swit.
Oh, by the way never ever refer to my mother as "Hot Lips". A tourist once did that and she punched him in the nose. The guy didn't press charges only because it was mother who hit him!
There are some facts I would like to set straight about what people saw in the movie and television series.
First off my father really got his nickname from my grandfather. Daniel Pierce was the town doctor and Last of the Mohicans was his favorite book but he enjoyed reading other novels as well. It was also my father's favorite book. My name comes from the character Hawkeyes's real name Natty Bumppo. Hawkeye Pierce also had a mother and sister.
Martha Evangeline Pierce was my grandmother. She was a cross between the actresses Kathleen Hepburn and Lauren Bacall. She was born in Vermont and first came to Maine to be a schoolteacher in Crabapple Cove. She is the only person who got away with calling Mom "Maggie".
Aunt Abby became a teacher as well. She was actually my sixth grade teacher.
My maternal grandfather "Howitzer Al" Houlihan really was a retired Army Colonel. Mom's parents did divorce but both remarried. They never came to Maine to visit us at the same time however.
My parents were only in Korea together for about a year, 1951-1952 the period covered in the book and movie. The guy who wrote the book grew up in Maine near Crabapple Cove but served at a different MASH unit. He met my father after the war and they swapped war stories. The book was a mix of their war stories.
When Fox decided to make a TV series based on the movie the author directed them to Crabapple Cove and my father Hawkeye. From there other former members of the 4077th were contacted.
The television show was supposed to be a more accurate version of the 4077th but of course the writers took liberties with the MASH veteran's stories. Also stories from other Korean War veterans were included.
My mother only had one husband. "Donald Penobscot" is the made up name for her fiancé before coming to the 4077th. Mom gave one of rare interviews with the writers of MASH and mentioned that she was engaged to a Major while stationed in Tokyo. The engagement ended because the guy was cheating on her. She declined to use his real name since the guy was still alive and went on to have a successful career in the Army. She made the name up on the spot. Penobscot is the name of a river in Maine.
The writers decided they wanted my mom to get married so they promoted her fiancé to Lieutenant Colonel and used the fake name she made up.
Mom says it would have been impossible for her to get married and divorced in real life in the short period of time she was in Korea.
While we are on the subject of former loves let me tell you about Carlye Breslin. In the show she was my father's former love.
The real Carlye (not her real name) really did get stationed at the 4077th and left under the circumstances shown in that episode. However she wasn't married at the time and her future husband got into advertising after the war. Hawkeye never spoke to her again until after the episode aired. They met in Boston in a meeting arranged by CBS. The real Carlye is a grandmother living in Boston near my sister.
Trapper John and my father remained friends after Korea. I know the actor who played Trapper had issues with the creators of the show but Trapper and my dad got along fine. It is better if my sister tells that part of the story because Trapper John is her father-in-law.