"So you decided it was okay to change things when someone in your family dies, but when it's someone in my family…" Cisco said, shaking his head at looking at Barry straight in the eyes for the first time since Barry had been to the gym the night before. He gave a dry, mirthless laugh before walking out towards his lab. Barry looked around at the team's expectant stares and sighed.
"I'm gonna talk to him." He said, jogging after Cisco. The others watched, worried looks mirrored across everyone's face.
"Hey." Barry said softly, entering Cisco's lab. "What are you working on?"
"These are the gauntlets for my suit." Cisco said, not looking up or giving any acknowledgement that Barry was there otherwise. "And you probably know nothing about that. Do you?" He asked, his tone cold and harsh.
"Cisco I'm really trying here." Barry said, his tone pleading but starting to take on a defensive tone.
"Barry, I'm the one who's been trying. I've been trying this whole time to get you to do this one thing for me, but you kept saying, No, Cisco. I can't, Cisco. I would never do that, Cisco." Cisco answered, clenching his fists around the tool in his hands.
"And now you're telling me you went and did it for yourself." He said, his voice raising. Here, Cisco finally turned around, tears evident in his eyes, along with hate and anger. Barry looked straight at him, his face dripping with confusion.
"Were you listening? It... it went bad. It went really bad." He said slowly, as if he was afraid of Cisco's anger.
"I don't care!" Cisco yelled, his voice breaking towards the end. "At least I'd have my brother back."
"That is exactly what I thought the moment I traveled back to save my mom. And you know what happened? I live a happy life. At least for a few months and then everything fell to crap. I started forgetting the team. I watched Wally die, Cisco." Barry said, his voice rising, elevated by emotions.
"Reverse Flash was the one to make me understand that I had to let my mom die. So we travelled back. I was forced to let him kill my mother while I watched. When I got back here things had changed." Barry told Cisco. The other meta stared at Barry with an emotionless mask.
"I screwed everything up. So I tried to go back and fix it again, and guess what? I got pulled out of the Speed Force by my father's doppelganger. After that I realized, everytime I go back, everytime I change something, that same thing could happen to someone else, or worse." Barry said, calming down slightly, with tears streaming down his cheek as he looked at Cisco. Barry stayed in the doorway as Cisco's eyes widened slightly.
"So if you ever think for one second that I don't want to go back and save Dante, to save you from the pain you're feeling, you are dead wrong Cisco. Yeah, you would have him back, but because of it, somebody might have something happen to them that's just as awful as what happened to Dante, and trust me, you don't want that on your conscience." Barry said sadly, turning to leave. "It's a heavy burden to bear. And I don't know how many times I've said this, but... I'm really sorry about Dante, man."
"Sorry doesn't change anything." Cisco said, but his voice wavered slightly and his eyes were filled with tears.
"No, it doesn't, but I can't go back. I can't change it. All I can do is move forward. I really hope you can, too." Barry said, sending one last smile at Cisco, this one dripping in sadness and pain, but also a bit of hope. Barry ran out in a burst of wind and electricity, throwing pictures and papers off Cisco's desk. He was about to turn away from them when a certain one caught his eye. It was the 'selfie' of him, Barry, Caitlin, and Dr Wells. Cisco picked it up and wiped tears from his face angrily.
"I'll try. Not just for you Barry, but for Dante." He whispered quietly.
