It wasn't supposed to go this way. No, not really. Sam injured and dying of a gut shot had once defeated three werewolves single handed. This was the same man who demons trembled before because they would rather return to hell than face him. The same man who had once sliced through a vampire's neck with only a thin wire and shear strength.

A man as small and puny as Nick should be no problem. With the rage in Sam's heart, he had no doubt he could tear into Nick at any moment. In fact, he welcomed the opportunity. Sam wondered if sometimes his kindness reached too far. This man he once pitied was now just as bad as the angel he once hosted. Well, nearly as bad.

So when Sam hears Nick's latest lie he is beside himself with anger. Face reddening, voice raising, fear surfacing. Because as much as he tries to hide it, Nick does scare Sam. Sometimes the murderous glint in his eye has Sam forgetting that Lucifer was ever killed in the first place.

So yeah, Sam is ready to rid the earth of this scum. But when hears Nick's words, he freezes.

"Search your feelings Sam"

No. No. No, no, no, no, no. It's not possible. It can't be him.

"He's awake"

And if that statement doesn't freak Sam out, then surely no other words will be capable of doing so. How many nights had Sam lain awake telling himself over and over again that Lucifer would never touch him again? How many of those nights had Lucifer been staring right back, unbeknownst to him? Suddenly, Sam feels eyes on him. It's not logical, he knows, but that's just what Lucifer does to him.

"Sam, nobody stays dead anymore"

Sam should've known. Damn it, why didn't he know? Because of course Lucifer is awake. Of course, every time Sam shows someone mercy it fucks the world over. All those nights he spent fighting his mind's image of Lucifer's true face with the joy of seeing his burnt wings plastered to the church floor was all for naught.

Handcuffs clatter to the ground. Dean. He needs Dean right now.

In his panic, he doesn't even see the punch coming. He barely feels it land. But it's enough for his training to take over. Before he even has the chance to process what's happened, he finds himself straddling Lucifer with his hands around his neck. Lucifer? No that doesn't sound right. This is Nick. The man who deserves to be strangled. Forget the fucking gun, Sam wants to feel the breath leave his body. He wants a front row seat to the light leaving his eyes. This man doesn't deserve to fear a bullet or a gun in his last moments. He deserves to fear Sam freaking Winchester.

Sam is positioned to do so. Nick's cries of pain bring him joy. But he hesitates. Lucifer's taunts ring in his head.

Do it Sam. Show me what you've got. You know how much worse this will end for you if you keep fighting. I'll have my fun either way, bunk buddy.

He can't do this. It's a mistake. Lucifer will win every single time so fighting doesn't matter. Lucifer? He knows that isn't right. Nick? This is Nick. Either way, his rage frightens him. Is he really about to kill a man with his bare hands?

That hesitation is all the time it takes for him not to notice the rock flying towards his head. Pain blossoms in his temple. He can't see straight. Lucifer is punishing him. He's still in the cage. Oh god, he never left. He can see the hooks shimmering in from behind the trees. The illusion is crumbling.

Dean. He needs Dean right now.

So maybe he is in hell. Maybe it was all a lie. But there is still a chance that it's just his tattered mind playing tricks on him. Either way, he knows he cannot remain in this place, this realm much longer. If he's going to die or if Lucifer is going to finally rip the veil from his eyes, he wants only two things. The safety of the impala and mostly, his brother.

Lucifer beats on the window and challenges him to come play. No, Nick beats on the window and challenges him to come play. This is Nick. The car horn blares.

And when Sam closes his eyes against the pain, he sees red staring right back at him.