Lost Love

by poisonandwinee

Amanda Markings fell head over heels in love with Henry King and got repeatedly crushed by him always choosing her older sister, Fanny, over Amanda. Once and for all through with him, Amanda decides to avoid him and find love elsewhere. But life has other plans and heartbreaking tragedies push Amanda and Henry once again in the same path.

1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

Once again, I was second best. I grabbed my crappy mp3 and rushed out and ran up to the roof and with shaking hands unlocked it and closed it as quietly as I could so as to not let anyone know where I was. I hated being questioned and I hated even more being seen while crying. "Please don't forget I love you" The words kept slamming into my heart like a dagger and I let the tears fall freely. I couldn't believe it, I was so stupid. So naïve. I hated myself for letting myself fall for him, for letting him reel me in, I should've known better. Like anyone would every love me. Sure, they would flirt and tease, but they would never want. I was the girl who had mood swing problems, who was easy, who wrote poetry. No one wanted that.

Trying to escape my Amanda Markings pity party, I stuffed my earphones and let whatever song was playing play, without really listening. I just wanted to drown out that stupid line out of my head. It was over, he loved my sister. He led me on, and I followed which was my own stupidity. It was done, I cried, I would get over it. To be honest, what hurt more was being second best once again. I was sick of it, I had so much insecurity, enough to kill myself with, and this didn't help my ego one bit. He was the one guy I really felt something for, the one guy who could move me. The one guy I knew inside out without ever having any real conversation with. The one guy I wasted three years on. In the beginning maybe it was just attraction, for he was hot and I was thirteen but it developed into something real, something scary. You try having dreams and thoughts about a guy you rarely meet and then see how horrifying it is. I wish it never developed, I wish it stayed a stupid crush. I wish my first love didn't get crushed, I wish I had faith left in love.

I took out my phone from my pocket to call someone, anyone. I couldn't bear this alone. My finger almost automatically clicked to dial my best friend's number, but I stopped myself. I had to do something else first. I opened up my Contacts and reached the H's. There, I hesitated just once before deleting one contact. Henry. It was done, I was through. Or I would be anyway, at least now I wouldn't be tempted to call him and yell at him. Or worse, beg.