A/N: So, funny story. This story got started a long time ago, like maybe six months or so, because I wanted to write something new, and I really wanted to write Lydia/Stiles. So I started just writing. This story is based on a lot of personal experiences, so I just wanted to vent a little. Lydia is incredibly OOC (sorry not sorry) and I realize that, but it was something I struggled with.
The story is finished, with 4 chapters. I don't have an updating schedule, just whenever I edit the chapters they'll make their way on here. Please be patient with me.
Lydia Martin was different from other girls. She didn't think things the same way they did.
She was popular, sure, and smart, but she felt like she was hiding who she was most of the time. She felt like she had two different personas – the Lydia Martin, the girl who had the highest GPA and who was dating the most popular guy at school, and then just plain Lydia, who was different. She was a tomboy, truly, playing football with her brothers from an early age and watching sports. Other girls at BHHS watched sports, sure, but Lydia got irritated every time one of them made comments about how the uniforms fit the guys. Sure, the girls were checking out the athletes, but Lydia - she wanted to watch the game. For the freaking game.
With Jackson, things were…complicated. Even with him, she had to hide who she was most of the time. He got really irritated every time she wanted to watch the football game with her dad, or play basketball with her brothers. He got irrationally irritated even when she went to sit in on his lacrosse practice or even went to a game.
"A girl's not supposed to want to do those things," Jackson would tell her. "Everybody knows that we're together, and they're going to start looking at you like some kind of freak if they knew you played tackle football with your brothers on Saturday afternoons, or if they discover your collection of Captain America comic books. It's not right for a girl to want to watch movies with explosions and hate The Notebook. That just doesn't happen and if you continue to do that, we can't be together anymore."
Jackson fucking Whittemore was always concerned about appearances, but Lydia loved him, so she always went along with whatever he said. She loved him, but she wasn't sure if he loved her back, and would do anything to be with him. Most of the time she didn't even care if he just pretended to care about her, because she loved him.
Not today, Lydia thought as she woke up on that Monday morning. She was tired of pretending. She was fucking tired of not being the Lydia she wanted to be. She knew she'd probably get snubbed by the popular crowd, but she didn't care. As she got out of bed, she pulled out her "weekend clothes" as she had dubbed them. She never wore jeans to school – the jeans were specifically reserved for weekends, but she really didn't care at this point. She pulled out a pair of blue jeans and the University of Michigan football long sleeved shirt her oldest brother, Riley, had sent her from where he was majoring in medicine. A lot of things entered her mind as she showered and dressed, but she did not give one single fuck.
"Darling, are you sure you know what day it is?" Natalie Martin had asked her daughter at the breakfast table. Lydia's other brothers, the twins, were laughing and joking around, but stopped when they saw her enter. Their jaws dropped slightly.
"I know, and I don't care. I'm tired of living a lie, Mom," Lydia said. She had her hair up in a ponytail and had put on minimal makeup. "Everybody thinks I'm this sweet girly girl and that's just not me. I want to be me."
"Good for you," one of the twins, Justin, said to her. "I never understood why you lived like that. We all know how you really are."
"J," Lydia said, somewhat moved, "There are several things about my life that I'm not happy with. That ends now." It was true. It was all ending now.
-x-
When Lydia Martin entered the school that morning, everybody stopped and stared. Scott had even been in the middle of a sentence before just stopping. Stiles pulled his head out of his locker, where he had been trying to find his damn Chemistry textbook – seriously, where the fuck did he put that thing? – when he noticed, so he looked up to see what the big fuss was about.
It was just chance that Lydia's locker was next to his, and as she undid the lock, Stiles cleared his throat before looking at her, "Wow, Lydia, you look different."
She was a little apprehensive and Stiles could sense that. "I'm not saying you look bad," he explained. "In fact, this is a really good look on you."
She smiled slightly, "Thanks, Stiles."
He was a little surprised, "You actually know my name? Of course I know who you are – you are the goddess Lydia Martin, who's been ignoring me since…well, since school even started when we were little. I just didn't think that you'd know who I was."
"Of course I know who you are," Lydia responded. Stiles was waiting for something cruel, like "I have to know who you are in order to humiliate you, Stiles," but that never came.
"Are you okay, Lydia?" he said, after a moment. She looked a little…lost.
She smiled, though Stiles could tell it was fake. It just didn't reach her eyes the way Lydia's genuine smiles did, "Of course I'm okay. I mean, why wouldn't I be?"
Stiles shrugged, and Lydia smiled. Her smile quickly turned to a frown when she saw Jackson approaching. She really hadn't been looking forward to this - like, at all. As Jackson approached, she saw the look on his face, and – oh great. He was pissed.
"What the fuck do you think you're wearing?" Jackson asked her, loudly. A bunch of people just stopped and gathered around to see their showdown.
"I'm wearing clothes, Jackson," Lydia said.
"Yeah, that's the shit you wear on weekends. Not during the week. We had a fucking agreement, Lydia."
Lydia was starting to let herself get angry. She didn't care what people were going to say about her anymore; she just wanted to be who she was. So she said, "We didn't have any fucking agreement, Jackson. You just said what I should and shouldn't do, what I should and shouldn't wear, to be a good fucking girlfriend. I'm done with that, you know. I'm done worrying about appearances and what people think about me. I've put up with your bullshit long enough. I don't care what anybody has to say about it, Jackson, but I want to be me."
"You?" he scoffed, and right away Lydia knew that this was going to get ugly. "You want to wear jeans and sweatshirts, and you want everybody to know that you're secretly a geek? That you play football with your brothers on Saturday afternoons, that you watch sports center with your dad, that you secretly collect comic books?"
Stiles' eyes widened at the last one. Lydia Martin was secretly a comic book nerd? No fucking way. That was too good to be true.
"Hey, leave Steve out of this," Lydia said, trying to ease up on the tension she was feeling in her chest. "We're done, Jackson, and I'm good with that. You have no fucking idea how good I am with that." With that, she slammed her locker shut and walked off. Jackson just watched her leave, kind of dumbfounded.
-x-
During lunchtime that afternoon, Lydia hid out in the library. She didn't care what people were going to say about her, not exactly, but wanted to avoid any further scenes with Jackson. She knew that she had hurt his ego and she didn't want to deal with a Jackson Whittemore temper tantrum. Seriously, did he not realize that he was almost eighteen? Almost adult men should not throw temper tantrums.
She was really hoping that nobody would find her, but wasn't that surprised when she heard Stiles' voice, "Hey there, Lydia. What are you doing in here?"
She was frustrated, but wasn't going to take it out on Stiles – he didn't deserve that. So, sighing, she said, "I'm hiding out. I don't want to deal with one of Jackson's temper tantrums."
"Yeah, I can't blame you there," he said to her as she bit into an apple. "So, uh…that stuff he said earlier, about you, is any of that stuff true?"
Lydia nodded, "Sure. I'm a girl and I like watching and playing sports with my dad and my brothers. And yes, because I know you're gonna ask, I do like comic books."
"I'm not going to make fun of you for that, Lydia," Stiles said genuinely. "I don't see any reason to."
"Really?" Lydia asked, surprised.
"Of course not. It would be hypocritical of me. I mean, I like comic books."
Lydia sighed, "Yeah, but you're you." She noticed the look on his face, so she figured she should explain a little better. "I'm not saying that you're a geek, that's not why. I'm saying that you're a guy. Guys can play sports with their friends, they can collect Captain America memorabilia and they can kick ass at Call of Duty on the weekends. People almost expect it from you guys."
"COD, really?" Stiles asked, intrigued. Lydia just nodded.
"Jackson and I don't really hang out on the weekends," Lydia said after a moment. "He would always tell me that girls aren't supposed to be into the things I am. That somehow I'm tainted because I go to football games to actually watch the fucking game, or because I root for the Detroit Tigers."
"Well, there is something wrong with that," Stiles said. Lydia was worried for a moment, but then saw the look on Stiles' face, so Lydia just stuck her tongue out at him. He just laughed. Then the moment got serious, "You know, Lydia, you should hang out with me, Scott and Allison. I know you and Ally used to hang out a lot but she hates Jackson, so…" his voice trailed off. "It's probably going to be hard for you at first, but I think that this, what you're doing, I think it's pretty great. You should always be true to yourself."
Lydia smiled, "Thanks. For not judging. For just listening."
"I'm not going to judge you for that, Lydia. I don't think it's right to stereotype or judge someone for what they're into. It's just not me."
Lydia smiled again, and this time, it was genuine, "Thanks, Stiles. I don't think you could ever understand just how much that means to me."
-x-
Stiles had been right, of course. Stiles had this annoying habit of always being right, Lydia was learning. That first week was a killer. She wasn't expecting anybody to accept who she was, but Jackson had made it his life's mission to make her as miserable as possible. He knew all her dirty little secrets, so he insisted on spilling them to anybody who was listening.
"Can you believe she hates chick flicks?" He was asking someone that day. "She'd rather watch something gory or with explosions than watch something about people's feelings." Rolling her eyes, Lydia walked past him but he jumped up to stop her. "Things can go back to normal, Lyds," he said softly, to make sure that nobody could hear him. "Just go back to the way you were and I'll take everything I've ever said back."
"No fucking way, Jackson," she said, pushing past him. She sat down at the lunch table next to Allison, who was deep in conversation with Scott.
As Lydia picked at her fruit, Stiles looked across the table at her, "Hey, the new Captain America opens this weekend. Wanna go?"
"Yeah, sounds great. I'm actually dying to see their portrayal of the Winter Soldier," she answered. Even though it'd been a week, Stiles still wasn't used to Lydia saying stuff like that – well, at least, not with all those people around. His mouth was open in an O shape, and Lydia laughed, "Hey, you might wanna close your mouth. Y'know, 'cause of flies."
Stiles nodded, "Yeah. Sure."
"You look kinda…surprised," she said, taking a bite of her fruit. "Not what you expected?"
Stiles laughed, "I guess I'm not used to the new you yet," he answered. "It is kinda weird."
"Ehh, you'll get used to it," she said, laughing. Stiles leaned over and poked Scott on the shoulder, "Hey, buddy, Captain America this weekend? Say, Saturday?"
"Can't," he said, his eyes not leaving Allison. "Ally and I have plans."
"A picnic," Allison said. "It's a family thing that Mom and Dad wanted Scott to come to."
Stiles shrugged, "Okay. Lyds, you okay with coming alone with me?"
Lydia laughed, "Sure, Stiles. I'm not afraid to be seen alone with you. Fuck whatever Jackson thinks, I don't care. Not even a little bit."
-x-
That Saturday, Lydia and Stiles went to see Captain America like they planned. They chatted before the movie and after the movie, Stiles suggested they go get a pizza. Lydia shrugged at that, and before she knew it, they were sitting in Pizza Hut.
"So, what'd you think of the movie, Lyds?" Stiles asked her. Lydia shrugged.
"I liked it. This is the kind of thing that Jackson would never go to with me. He despises comic book movies."
"Well I think it's pretty awesome that you watch these movies. Chick flicks get boring after a while."
Lydia gave him a surprised look, "I know, right? Jackson thinks there's something wrong with me because I hate them."
Stiles laughed.
Lydia cleared her throat, "Uh, this wasn't supposed to be a date, right?"
Stiles looked surprised, "Nope. Why? Did you think it was?"
Lydia shook her head, "I just wanted to make sure. It's nice to hang out with someone who truly gets me."
"You should never have to hide who you truly are," Stiles answered. "When you do that, it's like you're only living half a life, and nobody should have to do that."
Lydia smiled, "Thanks, Stiles."
What he had been saying to her made a lot of sense, after all. He was right. She was tired of hiding who she was. It felt like most of her life was fake. She couldn't remember when she was as open and honest as she had been with Stiles this past week. It felt…oddly right. It was comfortable. And she wanted more of it.