No one really understood how the way others run their life can completely change you. When you had nothing to do with their decisions. Life is hard and people protect themselves the best they can. My way was putting up a wall and pushing everyone away with my actions. Even while I'm living my dream as being a singer, I'm still angry. I didn't want it to be this way.

It started when I was thirteen. Back then, I was a really happy kid. My four friends were amazing. But, soon, I'd never see them again.

We were all playing video games. Logan was sitting out but still cheering me on. This was a normal thing for us to do when the weather was bad. We would all crowd into my small living room and play video games and watch horror movies all day.

"Alessia, we need to talk to you." My mom told me from behind me.

My brow was furrowed in concentration. "Hold on a sec, mom. I'm about to win."

"No you aren't!" James protested from beside me.

"Yeah, that would be me!" Carlos said cheerfully.

Mom sighed. "Its important."

Kendall was the one to pause the game and I turned around. My mom and dad were both looking at me with guilt in their eyes. Something bad was about to happen. But, I had no idea. I just sat there happily with a small smile.

"What is it?" I asked looking up from the floor.

Dad frowned from behind her. "Honey, we're sorry that we have to do this."

Now all of the boys were curiously looking at my parents and my smile started to fall.

"Do what?" I glazed at both of them but, no one replied. "Can one of you please tell me what's going on?"

"Your mother and I are getting divorced." Dad took a deep breath. "And your moving with me to California."

"What?" I shook my head. "N-no. I don't want to. I can just stay here with mom."

She shook her head. "I'm moving to New York."

"What's in New York?" My voice started shaking. "All the family is here. Why would you need to move there?"

"Just tell her, Lillian. She deserves to know the truth." Dad's voice was sounding angry and my mom just starred at me with guilt in her brown eyes.

"My.. My boyfriend is there."

That's all that it took for me to take off up the stairs. It wasn't hard for me to put everything together. My mom cheated on dad and now they were getting a divorced because of it. I was going to loose my best friends because of it. They were the people to come after me to find me crying my eyes out.

Kendall was the first to pull me into a hug. "It's gonna be okay, Al."

I shook my head. "No, it wont be. I wont see you guys ever again." That had me crying even more.

Carlos was even looking sad. "We'll keep in touch."

"Yeah, we will." James nodded as he pulled me into a hug.

They did keep to their word for a while. We talked through calls, texts, and emails. There wasn't anyone like them in LA.

A few months there, I just snapped. Cut my long blond curls to my shoulders and dyed it black with blue streaks. I told myself that I felt better that way.

Until I looked at my brown eyes. They showed everything. The anger, sadness, and regret. I should of fought harder to stay in Minnesota. There was plenty of family that would of let me stay with them.

It wasn't long until I learned how to put up a wall. No one knew what emotions were running through my mind. Then I stopped replying to any calls or messages from the guys. I needed to move on.

Then my dad got my career started. Thanks to him, the name Alessia Lovelyn means a lot more. I'm famous and following my dreams but, something is still missing. Or someone.