Karkat has this light, this radiance about him, like everywhere he walks is automatically brighter, and I told myself I would kill if that light was taken away.
But when it starts slipping away, I find I don't know what to do.
It's nearing midnight when I get the call from Karkat. I'm in the middle of reading Othello, so it takes me a second to tear myself away and look at the caller ID.
I frown, answering suspiciously. KK, no matter how late he may stay up, never calls me until morning.
"KK?" A choked sob is my only greeting. Terror seizes me and I bolt upright, knocking my book to the floor. "KK, what'th going on?!"
"H-Hey, Soll." Why is he trying to sound like he's okay?
"KK, are you alright? Are you hurt, are you lotht, are you-"
"I'm fine." He interrupts, but I know he's not.
"KK-"
"C-Can you just come over?" He sounds so utterly defeated, I'm already yanking on street clothes and shoving my feet into my converse.
"I'm on my way." I grab my keys and am out my front door when KK says
"Hey, Soll?" I pause half-way into my rusty Chevy, only one foot actually in the car.
"Yeah?"
"Please hurry." I furrow my eyebrows and bite my lip.
"I'll be over in jutht a minute."
Dear god, I almost have a heart attack when I pull up into Karkat's driveway and find a police car parked outside his house. Its flashing lights are blinding, and I see an officer walking out through the front door.
He nods to me as I hurry past him into the house, and I see with relief that KK's dad, Carmine, is there, sitting at the kitchen table with his back towards me. But something's wrong, as if the policeman wasn't proof of that. Carmine has his face buried in his hands, his shoulders shaking with sobs, and he doesn't respond when I say his name.
I'm about to reach out to him when I hear something move upstairs, and jerk my attention upwards. I cast another glance at Carmine before cautiously padding up the rickety staircase to Karkat's room, which takes up the entire second floor.
I knock softly against the worn, white wood door, gaining no answer.
"KK?" Nothing but a sob alerting me to the room's occupant.
I slowly open the door so as not to startle him, and find the room completely dark. All the lamps are off and the curtains are shut against any streetlights outside. "KK?" I look around the door and find the boy I'm looking for, huddled against the empty wall that stretches from the door jamb to his bedside table. He looks up at me in surprise, his eyes wide and terrified. They hold none of their usual shine, only glossy because of his tears. They look... dead.
"Sollux." His voice is unbearably hoarse, and tears track vicious rivers through his freckles like a current over stones. How long has he been like this?
Before I even know what I'm doing, I'm on my knees and hugging him, holding him as close to me as I possibly can. It takes him a second, but then he returns it, his nose tightly tucked into my shoulder.
I let him cry into my shirt, thoughts muddled as to what's going on. In the short two years I've known him, he hasn't cried once; he hasn't needed to cry. Hell, he has the nicest parents in the world, he's a right fucking genius with a full scholarship to his first-choice college, has had the same boyfriend for two years, his dad is a famous violinist and his mom-
Holy shit, his mom. Where is she? I hadn't seen her downstairs...
I shift position so I'm no longer kneeling, and Karkat is now tucked against my chest sideways, allowing me to lean a shoulder against the wall. He refuses to loosen the grip his fists have on my jacket, and I do nothing to remove them. "KK, where... Where'th Litha?" His grip does nothing but tighten, and my stomach drops to my feet. "Oh my gog, KK..." I burry my face into his gold hair, fighting back tears of my own.
Lisa was the kindest fucking woman on the planet, and probably the best cook too. She could quote Shakespeare like it was a second language, and she and I would have deep, analytical conversations about the differences between Hamlet and Iago over ice cream. The very first thing she did after her son confessed to being gay was take him to the nicest restaurant in town and buy him anything he wanted.
"Wh..." I fumble, forcing back the lump in my throat. "What happened?"
"S-Some drunk r-ran a red light," He begins shakily, words muffled. "and she didn't have time to m-move. By the time the paramedics g-got there, she was... she was..." I shush him, and start running my fingers through his hair soothingly and kiss his forhead gently, though I'm far from calm.
It isn't long before I feel my own eyes grow damp, tears sliding off my nose and taking my shades with them, little by little. Eventually, I just take them off completely, setting them next to where KK's phone sits on the faded carpet. KK's already seen me without them, and he's showing me a side of him I didn't know he had, so I don't bother with the hindrance that puts a barrier between us.
We sit there the entire night, and don't move even when when gray sunshine peeks through the curtains. If anyone thinks we're going to school today, they can go fuck themselves.
KK had stopped crying about an hour earlier, and now he just sits in my lap, facing the wall with me angled sideways. His forehead is pressed to the side of my neck and I have my arms wrapped around his waist, holding his slumped form against me. He's completely still, but I know he isn't sleeping.
When the morning sunshine reaches a gold glow, I turn my head to look into his eyes, and find his silver gaze locked on the white plaster wall. His cheeks are grimy, but that's not what wrenches my heart from my chest.
It's his eyes; they're no longer stars that light whatever they look upon. They're gray, dull, lackluster.
He flickers his flat gaze to mine, and he doesn't even try to smile. It leaves me utterly broken.
My stars have gone out and I don't know know if I can get them back. My stars are dead.
A/N: Well, I feel freaking depressed now.
Okay, I wrote this because I couldn't get the image of Sollux holding KK out of my head. This is also obviously part of "Of Freckles and Silver". It is the first sad one, and probably the last, because I can't stand making blonde-KK sad. I just can't.
Don't the names Carmine and Lisa go well together? I think they do.
This one takes place when KK is eighteen, and Sollux is nineteen. Sollux has already moved into his own place at this point, but KK still has to finish up his senior year and is still living with his parents. This takes place after Freckles, but before the others.
Okays, I think I'm done now. THANK YOU FOR ALL OF YOUR GUY'S SUPPORT ON THIS SERIES! I'll try to get around to putting it in one story, as well as updating Runners and C&S. I'm slowly but surely working on the next chapters. Slowly... but surely.
Ciao for now!
~Webs
