Ok, I was being bored and looking through things on Youtube, and I see this: 'Tobin Bell Interview: How Jigsaw Orders Pizza', and…well…DING DING DING!!! Anyways, hope you enjoy!
Bleep bleep…bleep bleep…
"Hello, this is Dominoes Pizza Take Away, how can I help you?"
"Can I order a pizza?"
(Silence)
"…Uh…is this Jigsaw?"
"Oh, how did you guess?" (Sarcastic hand clapping)
"How can you use a phone without using your hands?"
"You ever heard of loudspeaker?"
"Oh yeah, right…"
"Jigsaw, can you please just order the frigging pizza? I'm starving!"
"Be patient Hoffman, I'm doing it now."
"Yeah, yeah…"
"Um…Jigsaw, its me…"
"Amanda? What the HELL are you doing at Domioes?"
"Well, you said I had to get a job…"
"I meant a job at the SCRAPYARD, so we could get parts for the traps I'm making!"
"You didn't say that!"
"I was hinting. Very heavily."
"Jigsaw, come ON!"
"Hoffman…"
"Muttermuttermutter…"
"Keep going like that, you won't get a pizza at all, not even a muffin."
"…How do muffins come into this?"
"HOFFMAN…"
"Fine, fine…"
"Anyway, he'd like garlic bread, pepperoni pizza, coke and…a muffin."
"We don't do muffins."
"Sorry, my mind was elsewhere, as in HOFFMAN PUT THAT MUFFIN BACK!"
"Muttermuttermutter…"
"ANYWAY, just cancel the muffin then."
"Weren't you listening? We don't DO muffins!"
"Jigsaw, I told you, you ARE getting a pizza."
"…You aren't listening again are you…"
"Why would I want to get pizza?"
"Thought not."
"To eat?"
"Yes, I know what pizza is FOR, but why would I want to EAT one? We've got plenty of food as it is!"
"Jigsaw, you appreciate life right?"
"OF COURSE I APPRECIATE LIFE, IF I DIDN'T I WOULDN'T HAVE LOCKED SOME RANDOM PEOPLE IN A BATHROOM WOULD I?!?"
"Well, pizza is an essence of life; if you don't have it sometimes, your life doesn't feel complete. Trust me on this."
"You said EXACTLY the same thing about football and the X Factor…"
"Pllllleeeeeeaaaaassssseeee…"
"Sigh. All right…You still there?"
"Yes and FINALLY! I'm being given some odd looks over here, and btw I am starving too!"
"Good for you. Well, we'll make that TWO garlic breads and TWO pepperoni pizzas. There Hoffman, you happy now?"
"Oh, perfectly…let the games begin!"
"Hoffman, this is not a game! Eating pizza is not a game!"
"It is if I'm forcing you to eat it…with loads of spicy peppers all over it!"
"HOFFMAN, DO YOU KNOW WHAT KIND OF TORTURE THAT IS?"
"Oh, everyone does it at least once for a laugh."
"NO THEY DON'T!"
"Alright, your order has gone through…with the peppers."
"AMANDA, IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE-"
"See you in a bit-its £10.97 btw."
"Bwa ha ha…"
"AMANDA!"
Click.
"Man, that was good…"
"Congratulations Jigsaw, you have survived."
"SURVIVED? MY MOUTH IS ON FIRE!"
"Some people are so ungrateful for their local pizza delivery…not you…not anymore…"
"Ok ok, point taken, we'll get pizza more often…"
"WOOOOO!"
"…I'm getting some water."
"Can you bring some muffins while you're at it?"
"Ooooo, X Factor is on…"
"Muttermuttermutter…"
Well, hope you enjoyed! Please comment and ALSO say what your favourite type of pizza is. Dare ya!