One day Eru was hungry so he decided to make a peanut butter sandwich, but then remembered that he had made one last week but hadn't eaten it. Manwe, who was mad at Eru for using the last of the grape jelly, ran away from home.
Unfortunately, while he was running away he fell into a well.
Meanwhile, Eru was looking all over for his peanut butter sandwich and finally found it under the couch beside the cat. To his dismay there was cat hair and belly button lint all over it so he went out to wash it off in the well where he found Manwe.
Manwe promised to make Eru another sandwich if he pulled him out of the well.
So he made Eru a sandwich and they were happily ever after until Manwe's evil brother, Melkor, decided to burn the cookies Manwe was making.
Melkor attacked his brother with a banana, but Manwe remembered what Eru had told him once a long time ago:
"To disarm an attacker armed with a banana you must do two things. First, you make him drop the banana. Second, you eat the banana, thus rendering him helpless."
So Manwe sneezed on Melkor's banana, making sure that lots of snot landed on it.
Melkor – a bacillaphobic – screamed like a small school girl and dropped the banana, and Manwe, who didn't like germs that much either, kicked it at the cat.
The cat, who was the maiur Sauron, growled at them both and tried to launch itself down Manwe's throat, and Melkor – who had put on a decontamination suit – picked up the banana and shoved both it and the cat Sauron down Manwe's throat.
Thus, the cookies were burnt and Melkor's evil purpose fulfilled.