Notes: Oh my goodness, it felt so good to write again. I miss it so much. This story was inspired by one of my best friends who was dumped after 2½ years, to a young man whom she knew she was going to marry. This song that inspired this passage is one that she sung at her junior vocal recital called "I Carry Your Heart" which made me cry when she sung it. You see, this friend is a lyric soprano who I will be joining in our dreams to become opera singers. Please download it via itunes, you won't be sorry.
I OWN NOTHING, only plot.
Please read, review and enjoy.
She paced the apartment, hopeful, trying to find a reason to visit the loft. She checked her appearance in the mirror, sighing, momentarily angry for who she was. Shaking her head defiantly, Angel bit her lip trying to stifle a scream as she began to gather her things. Missing Collins was nothing she was familiar with; it shook her very core.
i carry your heart with me
i carry it in my heart
She didn't know why Tom decided to leave her, to leave her alone. After everything in her life, she kept him closely to her always, never wanting him out of her sight. He gave her a reason to live. Regardless of how intelligent and wise he was, leaving her could not have been of his power only. Therefore, to cope, she hated everyone. Friend or not.
i am never without it
anywhere i go you go, my dear;
She wondered where he was, what he was doing, what he thought of her. With Mimi being in rehab and her taking a job at a local clothing store, Angel was finally getting back on her feet. Collins was proud of her.
and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling
He was apart of her, she apart of him. There was no getting around their meeting, their love, their connection. That true, raw human connection that was only theirs. Even after their own respective brushes with death, hers being the most recent, they grew closer to one another.
i fear no fate for you are my fate, my sweet
Life was different, happier with Tom. He gave her a reason to live, a reason to laugh. He filled her every moment, her every laugh. His smile warmed her, held her captive. She tiptoed down the steps of her stoop in the uncharacteristically quite streets that seemed to wait for her.
i want no world for beautiful you are my world, my true
She looked about her, the sky becoming a dark grey; snow was coming. Tears began to fall before she could catch them; she hated that life, that life that moved on without her. She hated that life had to. She had to.
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
There was no doubt of his love for her, but it just…stopped. How does this happen? No answer is sufficient. Nevertheless, there was no misgiving that she would stop flowing in and out of his heart. He had to find himself, and she loved him enough to let him do just that.
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
She'd wait. She'd wait even if she had to wait until the day she died she would. She loved him, and would do anything for him. His heart was hers, and no one would take it away. Coming up toward the loft, Angel stopped, gasping. There he was, coming home from NYU, a time when he'd usually be coming home to her. Tears streamed. He lifted his head from his keys noticing her, his eyes immediately softening. She waited for him to react, and it felt like hours. Months. Years.
"Hi Ang." He called to her, his slight smile trying to hide all the pain she knew he felt. "Why?" she asked him, her voice beginning to break. "I love you." His pain evident in his frown now, he took the red scarf that she had given him and wrapped it tighter around his neck. "You are my destiny." Angel looked at him puzzlingly, confusion filling her mind and heart. Before she could think again, he had traveled so quickly into the building that she didn't even get a chance to open the door. She slammed her fists onto the doors, crying, screaming his name. He himself collapsed onto the floor, his books falling out of his arms. Each crying, a mirrored image.
i carry your heart
i carry it in my heart