7

Ramen Trickery

By

KisameHoshigaki257

This was a fun little story I wrote over a year ago for one of my class projects, with only a small amount of reediting being done to make it flow a little better. Sorry if it's still choppy, but life isn't about getting what we want, just what we can get. Enjoy and please review, all comments are helpful, for flames cook the marshmallows.

Naruto Uzumaki was wandering down the main street on Konoha, the Village Hidden in the Leaves, wondering what he should do with his time. It was a well known fact in the village that Naruto was very much a trickster when he was bored, often pulling strange pranks on people who'd been mean to him. Still, some held that his young ninja heart was in the right place, most of the time anyway. He paused in front of the Ramen stand that he loved more than life itself and looked into his pocket to see what money he had. Not for the first time he found that his money was gone and he tried to think of a way to eat some of the delicious ramen he so loved.

He slammed his fist into his palm as he thought of the answer. His friend Rock Lee was in love with Naruto's friend and former teammate Sakura. Surely if he could get Sakura to go out on a date with Lee he could convince his friend to buy him as much of the sacred ramen as he wanted. With this thought in his mind Naruto set out to find his friends, blonde hair and orange jumpsuit flashing as he traveled.

Rock Lee was where he could always be found, practicing his martial arts in one of the many training fields that littered the outskirts of Konoha, his green bodysuit nothing more than a blur as he moved. To be kind, many of the villagers would say that Lee was fervent in his beliefs, but it could not be said that Lee was what most girls would consider handsome. His straight black hair was worn in a bowl cut and his eyes were large and round like those of a fish. Combine this with the one piece green jumpsuit and one could write the young man off as a freak. This would do injustice to his hand to hand combat skills that surpassed almost all of his fellow ninja, including those of a higher rank than he.

Still, even with such skill and an honest heart, Lee was not the most gifted when it came to seeing through Naruto's tricks. This was the main reason that Naruto had chosen his green friend as the object of his latest trickery. As Naruto came to a stop a few feet away from his friend the sound of the familiar counting that Lee practiced floated to him. "One thousand ninety-nine, two thousand," Lee cried before coming to a stop and turning to his friend. "Hello, Naruto, is there something I can do for you today?" the martial arts master asked kindly with a curt bow.

Naruto bit back a chuckle as he thought about how easy this would be. "Nah, though there was something I thought I could do for you. Sakura owes me a favor and I was thinking that I could use that to have her go out on a date with you," The blonde trickster said with a wide grin. Lee's eyes lit with a fiery hope. "You would do such a thing for me, Naruto? I shall be forever in you debt if you would!" Lee cried as joyful tears appeared in his large eyes and a sunset appeared in the area behind him.

Naruto nodded and grinned, "Sure Lee, it shouldn't be a problem, how about you be at the ramen stand at six and I'll have Sakura meet you there," Said the blonde trickster as he wondered how he was going to get Sakura to be at the ramen stand. While Lee's heart burned for the young woman, Sakura held no such feelings and it was unlikely that she would agree. "I'll go and get Sakura and tell her to meet you there!" Naruto shouted as he raced off again.

A few moments found the young trickster in the working place of Sakura and had him looking at someone who was the opposite of Lee. Sakura was a beautiful young woman with short pink hair, a lovely face with shining green eyes, and not very skilled in hand to hand fighting. Sakura looked up from the clipboard she was holding with the medical records for an injured ninja that was lying next to the pair. "Sakura, do you think that you could do me a favor this evening?" Naruto asked his friend, praying that she'd say yes. Sakura flashed him an exhausted look. "I'm sorry Naruto, but there is a major operation that I have to be a part of. If I miss it I'll never get to become a medical ninja like I want, it's going to last all this afternoon and evening and I probably won't get home till tomorrow." Sakura said tiredly as she moved to the next patient.

Naruto's heart fell, if Sakura couldn't come then how was he to convince Lee to buy him the sacred ramen. As he left the trickster wondered what was going to happen if Sakura found out that that he'd told Lee she'd meet him for a date. Then inspiration struck. Like most ninja, Naruto could change his form with the use of his chakra. If he were to take the form of Sakura and pretend to be his pink haired friend then he could keep the promise to Lee and eat all the ramen he wanted as well! With this new hope he set out to prepare for the evening's meal.

A few hours later Naruto snuck into an alley just a block away from the ramen stand after spotting Lee. The young martial arts master was looking around hopefully for any sign of the woman he cared for and Naruto had no intention of disappointing the young man. If things became too hairy he could always use his ultimate technique, the Ninja Centerfold. As Naruto transformed himself into Sakura, he failed to notice Ino, Sakura's best friend and rival walk by and see him change.

Moments later Naruto walked up to Lee and gave him a smile. Lee smiled at the person he thought was his beloved Sakura and led the way to the counter. "I am really glad that you could make it Sakura! I was afraid that you would not be able to leave the hospital with you schedule!" Lee said happily as he held out a cherry blossom arrangement for Sakura. Naruto smiled and took it, placing it over his right ear. "Anything for my friends," He said in Sakura's voice as they placed their orders.

It was while waiting for their food to arrive that Ino, long blond hair worn in a high ponytail and blue eyes blazing with an emotion that couldn't be placed, came up and sat down next to Naruto. She placed her order and glanced at the two people beside her. "Hello Lee, it is nice to see you. Sakura, I'm surprised to see you here, didn't you have that major operation tonight? You've been talking about for a week," Ino said smoothly as she stared into Naruto's eyes.

Lee looked shocked at this news. "Sakura, if I had known there was something of this great importance for you, I would never have let Naruto set our date for this evening! Please, I insist that if you need to that we set another time for our date!" Lee said, not wanting to hinder his precious person's dreams of becoming a medical ninja. Naruto saw his chance for ramen leaving him and thought quickly. "No, it's fine Lee, the operation was changed to a different time," He said quickly, praying Ino would leave and not screw anything up. There was ramen on the line and there was no way that Naruto was going to lose it.

The food came and Naruto ate with gusto, something Lee remarked on and Ino gave a suspicious look at Naruto. The meal was pleasant enough, Ino didn't press matters and Naruto was left to answer Lee's questions with little fear of the blonde girl calling him on his vague answers. Lee was more than happy to tell of his training when asked and Naruto kept the discussion on Lee as much as he could.

It was only after they were finished eating that Naruto found himself in the worst place he possible could, thanks in no small part to Ino. The seemingly innocent comments Ino made came to a head when she asked Naruto if she could borrow his cell phone. Naruto had no way of changing the way his phone looked without Lee's sharp eyes seeing it. The blonde trickster pulled out his phone and handed it to Ino. The girl took it and looked at it with a smirk. "Sakura, what are you doing with Naruto's phone?" She asked smoothly, holding up the phone for everyone to see.

Naruto thought as fast as he could. "My phone was dying and I didn't know if there would be an emergency, so I asked Naruto if I could borrow his." The trickster lied smoothly, praying the girl would leave the matter alone. Ino gave him no such luck, "So, if I were to call the hospital and ask if all calls to you were to be routed to this number in case of an emergency, they would say yes?" Ino asked smoothly. Lee glanced back and forth between the two in confusion. Naruto nodded, not liking where this was headed. "Of course, how about we test it," Ino said as she started to dial a number on the phone so that only she and Naruto could see what she typed. The trickster saw it was Sakura's number and quickly tried to think of a way out of this mess.

"Um, Ino, I just remembered I was supposed to pick up some food for my mother, I really need to go, sorry!" Naruto exclaimed as he snatched the phone away before the call could be made. As he turned to leave, wondering why Ino was acting this way, the girl's voice asked him something that chilled him to the bone. "Surely Sakura, you're not going to leave poor Lee here without a kiss on your first date, are you?"

Naruto turned around slowly, trying not to let his fear show. It was either reveal himself as a fake Sakura and receive a terrible pounding for playing Lee like this for a bowl of ramen, or kiss Lee. Neither option looked that appealing to Naruto, but he decided to do the only thing that could by him time. He glanced at Lee, who looked to be in heaven at the thought of kissing Sakura.

"Ninja Centerfold," Naruto shouted, releasing the transformation of Sakura and replacing it with one of him in a female form, naked but for a few clouds in certain places. "Take this!" The female Naruto cried as he leapt away. The shock was too much for Lee, who fell away with his nose spurting blood. Ino quickly pulled a knife out and threw it so that several boxes slammed into the fleeing Naruto. The trickster was sent crashing into the ramen stand's supply of fishcakes. The blonde man lay dazed where he fell.

Lee pulled himself to his feet with a crestfallen look. "I fear I was a fool to believe Sakura would come on a date with me," The martial arts master said sadly as he started to walk away. Ino caught up to him and wrapped herself around his arm, content to forget about Naruto the Trickster. "I wouldn't feel too bad, she probably couldn't get away from the hospital. When I saw you buy the cherry blossom at my family's flower shop, I knew something was up. I also knew Sakura wouldn't be coming to meet no matter what you'd been told because of the operation, you're just lucky I cared enough about you to see what was happening. When I saw Naruto change into Sakura, I knew what was happening and decided to save you as much embarrassment as I could," Ino said softly.

Lee looked at her in shock. "You cared about enough about me to do all this?" he asked softly as a blush spread across his face. "Sure Lee, I know Sakura has never really treated you that well. I think I could do a much better job of showing you what it means to have a girlfriend as well. It's made me furious to see the way Sakura treats your heart ever since I learned what a good person you were. I care about you and I'd like to try and show you there are other girls out there besides Sakura," Ino said with a matching blush. Lee gave her his biggest grin. "I think I would like that Ino, thank you." He said with a large smile as a sunset appeared around them, despite the fact it was after dark.

Naruto looked up from his landing spot, the clouds having been replaced by fishcakes. "I wonder how ramen so good could lead to something so bad," He wondered aloud as a crowd gathered around him. It wasn't going to be fun when Sakura found out about this and he wasn't looking forwards to the impending doom that awaited him. As he pulled himself to his feet Naruto realized he seemed to be stuck in his female form. A trail of curses followed after the naked ninja running for his home.