Don't own anything.
I'm kinda weary about turning this story into a Kensi/G story, but it just seemed to suit the purpose.
She remembered when she had been the rookie, G and Sam had had her running around in circles.
Of course, she always wanted to please them back then, so she followed all the orders.
It had just been the three of them, with Renko sometimes rounding out the group.
However, after G had gotten shot, there was a new rookie, Dom.
Someone who had been just like her, eager, ready to please.
He was her partner, and as much as it sucked to be the only female agent, the guys made it worthwhile.
But he was gone now and it was just the three of them again.
God, she wished she could turn back the clock and force him to come to karaoke night.
Then there wouldn't be this terrible fear for everyone, the fear that Dom may never come back alive...
Footsteps broke the silence of the night, and she saw G walking towards her, "Hey G."
He looked at her, "Hi, where have you been?"
"Dom's." She watched him sit down next to her, "I was doing the dishes, it felt like it needed to be done."
G nodded, "Yeah, I just filed the missing report."
"Oh..." Kensi reached over and squeezed his hand, "How are you doing?"
He shrugged, "I'd like to see him come home. How are you?"
She pulled her hand away and glanced down, "Sometimes I think it would be easier if he were dead, because at least then we'd know what happened." Tears started streaming down her cheeks, "But I don't want him to die, we still have hope as long as he's missing."
G stood up and knelt beside her chair, his hands clasping hers, "Kensi... It's going to be okay, we will find him."
"How? We've been up all day and over half the night. Our last lead went cold, and all we can do is wait." She stared at him, "I know I may seem to be overreacting, but aside from Hetty, I'm the only girl and I take things harder. Hetty's been around a long time, she knows how to deal better than me. You, Sam, Eric, and Nate are guys, you process things differently than me." Her voice raised, "This is so unfair! Why Dom? He was a rookie!"
"Kenz..." His arms lifted her out of the chair and into his lap, "We'll find him, I promise."
"It doesn't make sense."
"And I don't know if it ever will. Maybe if we find him..."
She quickly turned around to face him, her legs dangling off the side, "If?! We have to find him."
"We don't know who has him, or where they've taken him. He could be in another country Kensi. Like you said, the trail has gone cold."
"I hate this, we can't do anything." She settled back against him, "Dom's missing and there's nothing that can bring him back."
"I know..." He held Kensi until her eyes closed, and her breath evened out.
Carefully picking her up, he carried her to the couch and softly laid down on it while she slept on top of him.
The desk facing him was still painfully empty, the green alien doll almost mocking him.
They had just teased Dom about it yesterday morning, the fact that he was an adult playing with a doll at work.
One of the last things they talked about was that stupid doll, and G was realistic enough to realize it may have been the last time he would ever be able to tease Dom about something.
He had been truthful when he called Dom friend, the young agent had earned his trust and respect.
Kensi's stories about Dom when they were partners had caused him to laugh and warm up to the rookie.
Plus, he was young enough to have life, and that made it easy to like him.
Except, he hated the fact that the word missing now described Dom.
As the team leader, it was his job to file the report, and seeing the smiling face of his co-worker as he wrote the details that said just who Dom was has hurt.
His gaze traveled back to the woman in his arms, she was taking this the hardest.
Out of all of them, Dom and her were closest, being partners and rookies on the same team.
A lot alike, only she'd never been taken.
Sam came down the stairs, and nodded towards Kensi, "She okay?"
"Yeah. She just needed to sleep." G's eyes trailed to the wall his partner had appeared from, "Done beating the hell out of the punching bag?"
"It served it's purpose. Today has been tough."
"On all of us. Is anyone still here?"
Sam shook his head, "No, Hetty kicked Eric and Nate out, she's giving them a ride home. When she saw Kensi come in, she figured that you two could talk, and once I was done with the punching bag, I would join you."
"She's smart." G absentmindedly rubbed Kensi's back, "You know, while we were talking, Kensi said she thought it may be easier if he were dead because at least then we would know what happened."
Sitting down, Sam nodded, "I can understand her reasoning. The hardest part about all this is not knowing. It wouldn't be better if he was dead, but we'd be able to stop wondering."
"I hate feeling so helpless, I mean, we didn't find him in that van, and there's no trace of him anywhere. The kidnappers are dead, and they're our only lead so far."
"I could've been tougher G, maybe pushed him some more. I should've been meaner."
"We can go over the what-ifs a million times, but it won't change anything Sam. Kensi has probably beat herself up about not calling him to make him come. Everyone is feeling guilty, we're all regretting that we didn't do something differently. However, it's not going to bring Dom back. The maybes aren't going to help us find him, and that's what we need to focus on. We need to bring him home to his family."
Sam shook his head, "It doesn't help. How..." His voice trailed off when Kensi gave a little sound of protest.
Both pairs of eyes watched her as she shifted closer towards the edge of the couch.
G's arm came up to stop her from falling, and curled around her when she finished moving.
A silence fell over them until Kensi eventually opened her eyes.
She blinked to clear her vision and found herself on top of G with Sam sitting in a chair beside them, "Hi."
"Morning Kenz."
"Morning!? How long did I sleep?" She tried to look out a window, but G's arms kept her from turning, "Can you let go of me?"
"No, and you only slept for an hour or so."
Surprisingly, Kensi didn't press the issue, and leaned back down against him, "Okay then, what time is it?"
"Two a.m." Sam answered her question, "Very early in the morning."
"I see." He didn't miss the glare she gave G, "Where's everyone else?"
"Gone. Sam said Hetty drove Nate and Eric home."
Her face fell, "And there's nothing new..."
G shook his head, "No."
All three began to remember the anguish they felt when they found the van empty, that feeling overcame them again.
Sam watched Kensi and G move closer together and smiled at how natural they looked.
It seemed like they would have each other to work through this, neither would ever have to deal with this alone, the had each other.
And that was all they needed... At least for now...