BPOV
"ALICE!!" I heard Emmett scream loudly through the house, even though almost everyone inside had incredibly sensitive hearing. I turned to Edward, in whose arms I currently lay. His eyes flickered from the stairs to my facial expressions; it was one of confusion and worry.
"Edward? What the hell was that?", his eyes focused on the stairs.
"Oh god, Emmett found the Llama Song," his face was one of utter horror, "I thought Jasper barred it from our computer, Bella I would cover your ears and eyes, if I were y-" "Err, why?" Before I could collect my own thoughts I heard an ominous sound coming closer to me, like a herd of elephants clambering down the stairs. And then, in front of me, was Emmett, wearing nothing but a red thong and a giant, papier-mâché llama head.
"Oh…
Have you ever seen a llama,
Kissed a llama,
Seen a llama,
Llama, llama, DUCK!"
On the word duck, he began to do the strangest dance I've ever seen, he got down on one knee, then jumped up, high enough to make a grotesque pose and then landed on this knee again. He did all this while repeating the Llama Song again and again.
"Now over to the 107 year old VIRGIN!!" he screamed in ecstasy while making some…ermm…disturbing poses, "Oh crank that, Soulja boy! Superman that, ho!"
"EMMETT MCCARTNEY CULLEN! I am going to crucify you if you refer to me as you 'ho' again!" Rosalie, crystal voice seemed to penetrate through the walls of the house, I had no idea where she was. But during her shrieking, I glanced at Edward who was staring at Emmett, he slowed opened his mouth.
"Prepare to die, Emmett," Before I could react to the anger in his voice, Edward had leaped up and snapped Emmett's thong string, who began grabbing at his family jewels. Trying to protect whatever he could, "Rosalie, Emmett is trying to striptease, again!"
"What?!" I heard a crash and suddenly the furniture around Emmett began to spin over our heads and triumphantly crashed down onto Emmett's head, " ONLY – FOR – ME, do you understand, my dearest hubby?" With every word I heard, Rosalie smashed more furniture into the pile. As she quickly came into focus, stood next to pile, I could hear someone mutter, from under the crushed pool table, "Oh My Llama!"