"Arthur, I'm worried about Mattie."

I folded my paper and gently laid it next to my plate of scones. "How come, love?"

"He's in our room, crying. I asked him what's wrong, but he won't tell me. Says I won't understand because-" Alfred looked down as the next part came out as a mumble.

"Pardon? I didn't catch that last part, Alfred." I waited patiently for the boy to repeat himself audibly.

Alfred looked up with tears in his eyes. "H-he says I won't understand because... because I haven't loved anyone!" he screamed.

I was taken slightly aback as he yelled, "I knew you wouldn't understand, either!" and flew up the stairs, crying, and slammed the door to Francis and I's room.

This just became an interesting Saturday, I thought. Of all the times Francis leaves, the boys have meltdowns! If he were here, he'd be laughing because he knows I'm not good at expressing my feelings! Now, I have to go talk to Matthew...

I finished eating my scones and set the dishes in the sink. I guess I'll read the paper when this ordeal is through, I thought.

I walked through the kitchen before climbing the stairs. As I knocked on the boys' door, a loud sniffle greeted me. "Matthew, I know you're in there. May I come in?"

I didn't hear a reply, so I opened the door. What I saw made me visually cringe, reminding me of nights I had looked like this. Matthew was on his bed, curled in a ball. He was shaking and whispering to himself. There were tissues surrounding his form, spilling onto the floor. He looked like shit.

"Matthew, love, what's wrong? Alfred's concerned about you." I walked over to his shivering form and sat down after clearing away some tissues. Then, I started stroking his hair, trying to comfort him.

"N-nothing, Dad."

"Matthew, you know I won't believe that. Why are you like this?" I continued to stroke his hair, watching him visibly relax, the tension leaving his body.

"I-I don't w-wanna talk about it..." Matthew lifted his head up and set it on my leg.

"If you don't want to talk about it, blubbering about it isn't going to help, either. Whatever it is, it always helps to tell someone when you're this torn up."

We sat in silence for a few moments, Matthew slowly breathing in and out while I stroked his hair.

"I-I'm having trouble at school, Dad. Th-there's a guy there, a-and-"

"He's not bullying you, is he?" I rested my hand on Matthew's shoulder.

"N-no. It's the opposite. I-I think I like him, Dad..."

Ah. That's what this is about...

"Matthew, you're telling me that you're crying because you have a crush on this...guy?"

"..."

"Matthew?"

"Y-yeah... It sounds silly when you explain it like that. A-and I didn't know what you'd say when I told you I liked a guy, so..." He was quiet for a moment.

"What did you think I would say?"

Matthew sat up. "I-I don't know. Something that would make me ashamed to say I liked guys..."

Am I really that uncaring and judgmental...?

"Love, I don't have much else to say besides that I'm hurt that you thought that. You can always come to me with this kind of stuff. You and Alfred. You can come to Francis, too." He'd know how to handle it better... "And never be ashamed to tell me or Francis anything because of what we might say. We love you and care about you more than you'll know. Alfred, too."

Matthew soaked in what I had said. "So, y-you're not mad that I like guys...?"

I laughed. "Matthew, why would I be mad? Think about it like this: you're father and I love each other, despite our many faults. We love each other for who we are. We are both men that like other men. Why would I be mad that you liked guys?" I looked at Matthew who had a sheepish look on his face.

"I-I don't know. I didn't know if it would b-be acceptable if I liked other guys. Th-there's a saying, something like, 'Learn from your parents mistakes.' I-I didn't know if you wanted us to like guys, like girls, or both... I-I didn't know..." He buried his face in my shoulder and I wrapped my arms around him.

"Matthew, you can like whoever you want. Francis and I will never judge you! We love you for who you are. Nothing will change that." I started rocking and humming 'Cradle Song'.

"...Dad...?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you." He whispered, "I love you."

I kissed the top of his head. "I love you, too."

"Hey, Dad?"

"Yes?"

"Wh-when did you know Papa was 'the one'?"

I chuckled and kissed the top of Matthew's head again. "I didn't."

Matthew pulled away from our embrace, confused. "What?"

"I didn't! I didn't know Francis was 'the one'. He knew I was 'the one', though. Matthew, you may never find your soul mate. Instead, they may find you!" I reached over and started to tickle his stomach.

He laughed hysterically, "D-Dad! Dad! Stop!" He had tears in his eyes and a huge grin on his face.

"Matthew, if I were you," I whispered near his ear, "I would apologize to Alfred. He's not doing well since you told him he wouldn't understand what you were going through."

Matthew's smiled disappeared. "Ou-oui. I'm sorry, Dad." He gave me another hug before getting off his bed. "I didn't mean to make Alfred sad."

"I know. He's in our room," I said, referring to the room that I shared with Francis.

"M-merci," he thanked as he left the room.

I sighed. I get to tell Francis what he missed at home. I laughed, thinking of how he would pout when I told him of all the excitement he had missed.