His Good Angel
Disclaimer: Not mine. It's all Lucas. I've read so much fanfic that I can't help but be inspired by other authors' ideas. This is just my take on the Vader and family what ifs. I hope I am formatting and posting this correctly.
His Good Angel ANH AU V/P L/H L
The man who had once identified himself as Anakin Skywalker stormed through the corridors of the Death Star determined to interrogate the treacherous ambassador. In a bleak cell, Princess Leia tried to ready herself to remain steadfast in the face of torture. And the Force, aware that horrors were moments away from being, released the spirit of Padmé back into the galaxy.
The interrogation droid came nearer, ever nearer. Leia's eyes widened in terror and despair as the needle approached. She didn't want to look at the droid. She didn't want to look at the black masked menace in the corner of the room, either. Her soul cried out for help. Perhaps the injection had already started because Leia could not account for what happened next.
The lady shimmered, outlined in blue light, appearing in the space between Vader and Leia. Vader stepped forward almost involuntarily.
"Padmé," his word should have been a whisper, but the vocalizer prevented any soft sounds.
Leia knew she had heard the name before. She knew she had seen this woman's face.
"No! This is a trick!" His hand reached out as if about to clench into a fist. "Who put you up to this?" he growled.
The woman backed away. Her own hands began to reach up to her throat. "Anakin?" her voice questioned shakily.
Darth Vader stared in horror at his closing fist. Quickly he opened his grasp.
"Anakin, what's happened to you?" the woman gasped.
"He's Darth Vader," Leia interrupted.
"Be quiet, Princess," Darth Vader ordered. His attention was focused almost entirely on the blue specter. "Padmé?" The dark lord of the Sith reached out to the woman again, this time gently. His black gloved fingers just touched the light flowing at the end of her hair.
It might be the injection that was causing her to hallucinate ghosts and an enemy who could only be described as yearning but Leia was never one to miss an opportunity. If Darth Vader were distracted by the strange presence, than Leia would use this chance to escape.
Slowly, Leia sidled off the ferracrete bunk. She needed to some way to stop Lord Vader. If only she had a blaster …
"This can't be real," Darth Vader expressed in what would have been a mutter if his vocalizer allowed him to mutter.
Somehow Leia was not at all comforted that the Dark Lord of the Sith considered himself to be having a moment so divorced from reality.
The woman in blue moved closer. "Oh, Anakin." Her hand reached out to touch the hard black mask. Her face expressed a mixture of horror and pity.
Almost as if by reflex, the rage caused him to bite out "that name has…" he stopped himself from completing the thought. In the face of this miracle, with this chance to see Padmé again, he didn't dare deny anything. He had already given up so much.
He reached out to her as if to draw her into his embrace. Padmé inched forward before collapsing on the hard ground of the cell.
"Noooo!" he wailed.
Leia turned to look at the monster, her enemy, reputedly heartless, and now crouched on the floor by the fading blue presence. Even dumbstruck as she was by the sight, Leia knew she needed to take this opportunity to escape. She moved toward the door.
Darth Vader's mask turned to face the Princess. "Help me. Please. I'll do anything. Only, I cannot lose her again."
Leia's heart seemed to stop. It had to be the drugs. How else could she explain this bizarre situation?
It was the second time in his life that he made that offer. The second time that he had submitted himself to another, asking only for the life of his beloved. Logically, it didn't make sense that this girl…but he was not using logic. The force swirled around him chaotically: hope and despair, love, need, anger, and loss all emanating from the man who had been the Chosen One.
"She's not corporeal. And even if she were, I am not a healer," Leia muttered, edging closer to the door. "I don't even think a medical droid would help."
He bent towards the woman who seemed to be fading. "Padmé, please don't leave me again. Please. Stay."
The woman's lips seemed to move. "Ani…" Then the spectral presence disappeared.
Leia was unprepared for the storm. The Dark Lord of the Sith seemed still but nothing else was. The lights sparked. The droid seemed to flop about the room, banging against walls violently. Leia backed up against the wall. She had been prepared to deal with ruthless torture. She had been expecting to face the cold and unrelenting hatred of the Emperor's enforcer. This frenzy…Leia didn't even know how to classify what this was.
She was terrified. The moment she had been captured, Leia had expected her life to be forfeit. But not like this. She would not lose, a casualty of a madman's anguish. She grabbed hold of the interrogation droid. It was a weapon she could use. As Darth Vader came towards her she tried to calculate where his armor might be vulnerable. How likely was it that she could defend herself?
....
He awoke in Med Bay to the feel of millions of voices screaming in agony. At first, Vader thought he was remembering the past, the horror of slaying his compatriots in order to attain the power of the Dark Side, in order to save Padmé. The Emperor would not be pleased. In the long lonely years since his turn, Vader had forced himself to compensate for his new physical limitations. His one attempt to overthrow Palpatine had failed and Vader had resigned himself to working for his master and somehow achieving stability and order in this new Empire. He could not save his loved ones but he could ensure his place. It was not the place he wanted … but he would not be passed over.
He would not, could not explain the vision. He had tried so hard not to think about his beloved wife. He was not strong enough to live on that pain. Sometimes, he tried to tell himself that he was better off without her. After all, she had betrayed him with Kenobi, brought his master to Mustafar to kill him. Instead, after all he had done, he had killed her. The physical agony he experienced daily was something he could cope with. He was not able to lose her again and again in his nightmares and now in this vision.
He felt a familiar force presence. Obi-Wan, his former master, was on board this abomination of a space station. He could leave the med bay and track down his old mentor and achieve vengeance for the hollow wreck he had become. But Vader felt weak. Loss was too fresh. Another presence was on the edge of his perception, soothing him, but he could not reach it. Padmé's loss was a ripped open scar, his emotions still bleeding out and he sank back into oblivion.
A weak pale blue presence stood by Vader's bed watching as the equipment monitored her husband's vital statistics.
"Ani, wake up," she whispered. But her presence in the force was not strong enough to carry her words. She had tried to return earlier. Aside from the desire to see Ani again, there was something she felt she had to do, some purpose which she had not yet accomplished. She did not have control; she was not strong enough. Padmé flickered out again.
...
"Ready my craft," Vader commanded. The inactivity had reawakened his need for motion. In space he could focus on the present. He could use his gifts well and destroy the rebels threatening the empire.
He should be sick of battle. Throughout the hellish years of the Clone War, he had been sent from mission to mission, a trained killer. Chasing after Dooku and Ventress, responsible for the lives of his clone troops, Anakin found himself on the battlefield. In the old days, he dreamed of a more peaceful existence, twining his heart, body, and days about Padmé. Yes, he had traded his honor and his vows for the chance to truly wield the full power of the force, for the ability to save Padmé as he could not save his mother. Still, the young man who had been horrified and glad at killing an entire tribe of Tusken raiders was almost completely swept away in the months of methodical killing. He was a killer long before he ascended the Temple steps and it was the Council who had supported his bloody deeds. Oh, the sanctimonious jedi might preach that their attitude made all the difference – but did those he destroyed in battle care why he ended them? Only the jedi could be hypocritical enough to harp on letting go.
In the cockpit, Vader focused on the rebels. Separtist or Rebel, threats to the empire mocked all he had been through. As he aimed at the enemy craft in front of him, Vader spared a thought for whoever had been responsible for the hallucination/vision. There had been assassination attempts before. Perhaps Prince Xixor had finally used his vast informational resources to uncover… Or perhaps this was even a test from his master who claimed to forsee all. For a moment Vader's rage was once again directed towards his master who had cheated Vader of all he truly wanted and condemned him to a half-life as a creature of terror. Not that Vader didn't enjoy the fear he caused, he had truly grown to enjoy his power – what he still could grasp. But Palpatine had no right to …if it was Palpatine.
He concentrated once again on his task – protecting this abomination of a space station. One of these pilots seemed to shine in the force. Vader had hunted down all the jedi. All save his former master and Yoda. This pilot, radiating power and light in the way he used to seemed to mock him. This pilot would learn the power of the dark side. Vader took aim.
...
"You have done well, Luke," Obi-Wan smiled at the young pilot. He tried hard not to think of another pilot hurtling in space after nearly destroying his unknown child. But he couldn't help but dwell on his former padawan.
Vader seemed strangely absent, not counting his recent defense of the Death Star. Obi-Wan was surprised. He had expected to fight Vader during Leia's rescue. Weary of the years, he had almost looked forward to joining the force and finding peace. It seemed he would be a teacher once again. And teaching Skywalkers had never brought peace.
...
She managed to appear again as he lay concussed in the cockpit of his TIE Interceptor.
"Ani"
He knew he must be going out of his mind. Some system must be malfunctioning. Why else would he see this woman he had killed?
"Ani you must…"
"I must stop imagining you? That's what I should do for the sake of my sanity." He was angry as always that the universe was playing a joke on him. He was frightened about what it meant that he was seeing Padmé. Was he finally dying? Were his systems finally failing? Somehow, after the long, lonely years, Vader could no longer look on death as a complete negative. But he had no intention of dying, yet. He had so much he wanted to do. Such as killing Palpatine because his sithspawn master had never told him about this.
"You're not imagining me."
"Haunting me then. It took twenty years for you to get your revenge but I'd rather you torment me from beyond the grave than leave me again."
"I never told you, Ani, but sometimes you sound like a bad holodrama."
He was incensed and hurt. "This is what you wish to say to me?"
"You're lucky I'm wiling to say anything to you at all after you choked me."
There was so much he wanted to say. For accuracy's sake he wanted to remind her of her perfidy. He had offered her the empire and she had rejected him. Vader sighed heavily. "You're still beautiful."
"For a ghost?"
"For anything," he paused, the silence only broken by the rhythmic rasp of his ventilator. "I…I didn't mean to kill you."
"You didn't kill me," Padmé looked at him in shock. "Crushing my throat because you thought I had betrayed you didn't help. But you didn't kill me."
"Palpatine said…"
"Oh, yes! Believe everything he says! Did he ever teach you the full power of the Dark Side? Those new powers worked out so well."
"I was desperate. Yoda wouldn't help me. I thought Palpatine was my friend. You thought so too, once." He hadn't understood why she had changed her mind. He had refused to understand. He had given Palpatine his loyalty – until he became a sith and learned that loyalty was only a waiting game. Perhaps Padmé as a politician had always known that, had as little understanding of the bonds of friendship and love as Obi-Wan.
"I know. I don't think I shall ever forgive myself for that. " The light surrounding Padmé dimned.
"Angel…You… I didn't mean to hurt you." He was frightened. Hallucination, vision, emanation, whatever Padmé was, she was here with him once again and he could not let her go.
"On Mustafar?"
"Then. Now. Ever."
"I forgave you long ago." Her image flickered and she said, "I can't stay. But I'll try to return as soon as I get accustomed to this."
...
The weeks following his return were filled with confusion for Vader. Called to the Emperor for punishment at losing the Death Star, Vader submitted as the Emperor's Hand severed one of his mechanical limbs as humiliation, punishment, and warning combined. Like he had when he was younger and Watto's slave, Vader hid his true thoughts from his master and bided his time. Perhaps he had dreamed the episode. Perhaps Padmé was called up from his subconscious. But if she was indeed real than it was time to delve into Sith lore and learn the power to keep her with him.
...
It had been weeks since the Battle of Yavin, weeks since Leia had reported the details of her rescue. She had not mentioned the strange interlude with Darth Vader. If it were not for his absence when Tarkin obliterated Alderaan, Leia would have thought she had imagined the entire affair. Tarkin had been both thrilled at the Sith Lord's absence and chagrined at not having Vader witness to the Death Star's power. But Vader, according to the former Moff, had been recuperating in Med Bay. The stormtroopers who had rushed in to check on Vader hadn't seen the woman, so Leia could only assume whatever she saw a product of the drugs. Vader's suit was rumored to be life support as much as armor. He had had a malfunction. Leia wondered if it were possible to exploit the Sith Lord's health issues in combat. His collapse must have been due to ill health. The Princess refused to acknowledge her memories of an emotionally vulnerable Sith Lord.
It was hard enough to mourn for a planet, to heal from the second attempt at interrogation. A few hours after Vader was escorted away from her cell, Tarkin's henchmen and the droid returned. Torture was never pleasant, even without the threat of Vader ripping her secrets from her mind. Still, Leia had felt relief that she would not have to work quite so hard to defend her thoughts. With Vader out of the picture, she had had a greater chance.
...
Obi-Wan intended to train Luke further in the ways of the force. Somehow, he found himself dealing with Alliance protocol. General Kenobi the great Negotiator was a valuable resource and the Alliance sent Obi-Wan on numerous missions. While Obi-Wan regretted the occasions when he was separated from Luke he completely disliked the interrogation by the Alliance leaders. Mon Mothma had been a politician, a group he still devoutly distrusted. More significantly, Mon Mothma knew the old stories, knew enough to know Jedi were not supposed to have offspring. For one half of Kenobi and Skywalker to show up with a young man with force ability and the last name of a missing hero…
Obi-Wan felt his skills at avoiding questions were growing. He had inspired Luke with stories of a heroic deceased parent. Until he explained matters fully to the boy he would not reveal information to anyone else. Besides, the words he spoke were the truth form a certain point of view.
If Obi-Wan had watched more closely, if he had allowed himself to notice Luke's idolization of the Princess of Alderaan, he might have considered telling more, much more quickly.
...
She found him staring at a photograph on a datapad. Hovering over his shoulder, she stared at the blond, blue-eyed young man who looked so much like her Ani.
"We have a son," he rasped. "All these years…on Tatooine. Padmé, we had a son."
"He's so tall. He was just a baby when he left my arms….and now…" Padmé broke off. "But what about our daughter?"
"A daughter?"
"We had twins. The file doesn't mention his sister. Oh, Ani, you don't think she's …" she couldn't say the word.
"I don't know. I never knew." He longed to enfold Padmé in his arms, longed to comfort her, but he couldn't. Together once again, they were still cruelly separated.
Silently Vader made a promise. He would have his family again. He had as yet made no progress in his research. In twenty years he had not made much progress on healing himself through the force – he was only able to survive without the mask for a few short seconds. Still, he had this new chance. As for his son, a smile creased Vader's face, twisting the scars. As for his son, he symbolized hope – not for the rebellion the boy misguidedly fought for, but for Vader's chance to free himself from Palpatine and create a world where he and his family would be free and secure. He would place a bounty on Luke to be brought to him alive. He would track his child across the galaxy. He'd have to disguise this from the Emperor but that was nothing new. Palpatine and Vader lived in an atmosphere of mutual distrust. The calm he experienced around the powerful force user, the times when Palpatine favored him with his thoughts, none of that mattered in the face of the larger betrayal.
His daughter. Vader hoped she was alive and he raged against the fate that brought him joy with one hand and withheld it with the other. For years he had feared nothing, for he had had nothing. Now with hope, fear battered against his tender heart once more.
He looked at Padmé who was still staring at the image of their boy. There was so much he wanted to say to her, was afraid to say to her. Once he would have felt supreme confidence in his powers. Then, Obi-Wan had left him burning in the fires of Mustafar and while he had learned to be strong, forceful, decisive, to expect perfection of his men because he himself still excelled whether in flying or in combat, he had failed at everything that truly mattered to him. Now the tasks facing him seemed monumental. Could he bring Padmé back to a more solid state, heal his body so he could be with her, bond with his son, find his daughter, overthrow Palpatine….? The list seemed overwhelming. As Anakin Skywalker he had nearly always accomplished the impossible. The nearly might as well have been the greatest chasm. Vader shook himself from his reflections. He had always preferred, indeed relied on, action.
"I feel so helpless," Padmé complained. "I died. I was heartbroken and just "
"Gave up. What happened to the woman who battled a nexu on Geonosis?"
"What happened to the man I married?" she retorted.
"More machine than man. I never thought…"
"I know that. It was rare for the Hero without Fear to think." She smiled reminiscing.
...
Anakin's children were a handful, Obi-Wan thought once again, rubbing at his bearded chin. Nothing could warm Hoth, but the sparks flying between Leia and Captain Solo came close. The rest of the base might be entertained by the tension between the not yet couple, but Obi-Wan could only wonder what Padmé would think of her daughter and the brash flyboy. Then again, he had thought Padmé more level headed than to secretly marry a Jedi. He had warned the Senator, but like all politicians she said one thing and did another.
Leia seemed so like Padmé with her dedication, her desire to champion, but the fire that burned in her, the anger which ignited so easily, was a trademark of Anakin. A dangerous heritage.
But was it any more dangerous than Leia kissing Luke? The gossip was already making its way and like all gossip many variations proliferated.
...
"What are you doing?" she demanded.
He couldn't answer fully. They were on the bridge of the Executor and Hoth was on the viewscreen.
"Not now," he thought hoping she would understand but knowing that the tilt of his helmet and the twitch of his gauntleted hands was not enough to convey his meaning.
But Padmé would not be ignored. Telling Admiral Ozzel and General Veers to wait for his word, he walked back to his chambers and privacy.
"You can't endanger him like this."
"He is a skilled pilot, strong in the force. He brought down Palpatine's pet project."
"Which just means he is in the thick of things. I spent the entire war wondering if I would be a secret widow."
"You made me a widower," Vader accused. How dare she use that against him? He had grown used to command. Perhaps a part of him would always feel awed that a slave could win the heart of a former queen, but said former queen needed to learn…
"We are not rehashing my death. You shouldn't have choked me. I shouldn't have yielded to death…"
"I worried about you before. I would dream of you safe and then you'd be kidnapped or contaminated with a virus. I remember when I first saw a real angel on the moons of Iego. She was beautiful but she could have been a Hutt compared to you. I dreamed of you night after night. The council sent me into situations I would never have chosen, risking my life for a Hutt's spawn when the Hutts had made my mother and me slaves. You were the one good left in my life. My good angel."
"You always knew what to say to me," Padmé said a tear snaking its way down her cheek. Was it Anakin's imagination or was her form becoming more opaque?
"No more bad holodrama?"
"Not unless you want to tell me I've grown shorter," she smiled.
He reached out to touch the tear on her cheek, shocked that he was able to touch both the salty drop and the soft flesh beneath.
Tenderly as if she were the most fragile thing in existence, as if she would disappear like all his dreams, Vader enfolded Padmé in his arms.
"How?" he asked her.
Once he was the Chosen One, born of the force. He should not be surprised by miracles.