Not without you

NCIS was filled with chaos and confusion in the wake of the Dearing bomb threat. The weeks leading up to this moment had been fraught with fear and worry as Team Gibbs worked against the clock, and now their worst nightmare had become a reality. The bomb ticked away in the navy yard, in Vance's car no less, and it was anybody's guess whether Gibbs and Cole would be able to diffuse it in time. Tony had taken it upon himself to evacuate the upper floor despite the order to immediately vacate the premises.

He often gave the impression of being vacuous and vain, without a thought for anyone but himself. However, actions speak louder than words, and anyone who'd seen the many patently unselfish deeds of Anthony DiNozzo over the years would know that beneath the carefully cultivated veneer, lay a wealth of warmth, intelligence, loyalty and integrity.

Ziva could attest to that. After the Damocles had sunk and she had been given up for lost, it was Tony who spearheaded the operation to find and rescue her. He, along with McGee and Gibbs, had allowed himself to be captured and taken prisoner in that hell-hole in Somalia… for her. When she pointedly asked him, "Why are you here, Tony?" his response was completely surprising and yet spoke to her deepest desires, "I couldn't live without you, I guess."

In the weeks leading up to the current chaos, Ziva had found herself increasingly aware of just how precarious life could be and how much Tony had come to mean to her. As a Mossad agent she had dealt daily with life and death situations, but for the first time she felt like more of a participant than an objective spectator, which meant that her ability to distance herself from her emotions was slipping. For someone who was used to being in control, the sensation was both disconcerting and strangely freeing.

And so it was that she found herself helping Tony to evacuate the upper floor, refusing to leave his side. When he tried to get her to leave, her fierce response "I'm not going without you!" coupled with her protective grabbing of his arm ignited a spark of hope in Tony's chest. A hope that just maybe the feelings he'd been harboring weren't entirely one-sided.

However, the moment was short-lived, since the next thing he knew he was unceremoniously being pushed to the floor with Ziva as a human shield and the roar of an explosion ringing in their ears.

Tony's heart was pounding as he held on to Ziva and rode out the last of the explosion. The elevator shook and rattled and Tony imagined the cable snapping and sending them plummeting to their deaths – that was of course if they were spared a fiery death. By some miracle, however, they were spared both scenarios, but they were still stuck in an elevator for an indeterminate amount of time. In a crisis like this, freeing them from their metal confinement would be the least of anyone's concerns. The power was out, but the back-up generator had kicked in so at least they had some light.

He thought about Gibbs and Abby and McGee, and prayed with everything in him that they would be alright. Finally, he found his voice. "Ziva. Ziva, are you alright?" he asked while softly stroking her back. She lay sprawled on top of him. "Yes, I am fine." She replied with her characteristic matter-of-fact voice. "You?" she asked. "A few bruises from hitting the elevator so hard, but I'll live," he replied.

After a moment's silence he said, "Thank you… You may have saved my life back there." Still unwilling to relinquish the protective position, she raised her head to look at him and replied, "It's nothing you have not done for me." Moving into a sitting position, she continued "And besides, I did not want to lose you…"

At this, despite the pain of the quick movement, Tony abruptly sat up. This was the moment of truth, the opening he had been waiting for. The only question was, was he brave enough to take it? Staring at her intently, he searched for any sign that would give him a clue as to how to continue. Just as she was about to break eye contact and duck her head, Tony reached out and touched her cheek, slowly caressing her. "And why is that?" he asked, dreading and anticipating the answer in equal measure.

After a slight hesitation, she replied, "Well, you are important to me. You are my partner, my friend…" At Tony's intent stare, she trailed off. Finally, she decided to face up to the moment, and admit the truth. "I couldn't live without you," she choked out once again replaying the words he'd used while under the influence of truth serum in Somalia.

A heartbeat, then two passed as Tony inched closer to her. Looking into her eyes, he slowly closed the distance between them. Their lips met in a soft, gentle caress that left her feeling awed and cherished. She had kissed Tony before when they were undercover, but far from being the frenzied coming-together they had had to portray as passionate assassins, this kiss touched the soul – it stole over her in increments, and it was gratifying in a way that was not only physical.

Reluctantly, Tony broke the kiss but held onto her. "Since we're going for broke, there's something I have to tell you..." I love you, Ziva," he finally breathed. His body tensed in anticipation of the rejection which he was sure would follow, but it never came. Instead, he felt the weight of Ziva seating herself on his lap within the circle of his arms. It was a decidedly romantic position, one synonymous with Prince Charming sweeping the princess off her feet and carrying her away. Tony, however, did not comment on the incongruity of Ziva, his indestructible ninja, displaying such vulnerability. The circumstances were anything but normal – they were stuck in an elevator after a serious crisis and Ziva had finally admitted that she had feelings for him.

Hearing his declaration freed something in Ziva. After years of restraint, the desire to be closer to him now was overwhelming. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she resumed the kiss with such passionate intensity, Tony could practically feel his heart beating out of his chest. Her tongue tangled with his in a dance that was both familiar and refreshingly new, and Tony couldn't think of a more pleasant way to spend their confinement. As the kiss grew bolder, so did his hands, roaming from her shoulders to her breasts to the hips that had so often tantalized him.

This time, it was Ziva who broke the kiss. Much as she enjoyed it – Tony was after all an expert kisser – there were important things to say. Gently drawing back, so she could look at him, her hands remained in his hair. "Tony, I love you, too," she stated, feeling the importance of the moment as joy lit his eyes – the eyes that she could get lost in, that she now wanted to get lost in.

"Oh, don't get me wrong," she continued, "You are one of the most annoying people I have ever met, but I've come to depend on you – and I never wanted to depend on anyone. You've always been there for me- even when I didn't want you to be, and I feel (she hesitated) safe with you. You make me laugh, and when I think of home, yours is the face I see. You're arrogant and pig-headed, but I've seen how deeply you care; I am living proof of that."

"I can't tell you how long I've waited to get here."

"Into an elevator with me?" she joked.

He smiled.

"No, to the point where we'd finally be on the same page, mi amore. It took a crisis, but I don't care how. All I care about right now is that you're in my lap-"

"Tony!" she exclaimed punching his shoulder.

"In my arms," he smilingly recovered. "And I want to keep you here forever, my beautiful ninja. Ziva, I don't want to waste any more time. You're the strongest, bravest, most exciting and infuriating woman I've ever known. You challenge me and make me want to be a better man.

The sincerity of his words was reflected in his eyes. "I don't want to waste any more time either. I want to be with you."

With that, she rolled him onto his back and straddled him, kissing him like a dying woman in a desert. His senses were on fire and his heart was engaged, but much as it pained him and his over-stimulated libido, he halted her wandering hands before it could become more than a kiss.

Holding her face in both hands and interspersing his words with kisses to her lips and face, he said "Baby, I want to, but I don't want our first time to be in an elevator filled with debris. I want to be able to show you the attention you deserve; I want the first time we make love to be burned into your memory and mine for its own sake, not as a memory mixed with this disaster."

"I know you want it to be special. I just want you."

The fire department chose that moment to stage a rescue.

Once they had been helped out of the elevator shaft, Ziva grabbed Tony's hand. "Don't leave me," she whispered.

"Never," came his vehement reply.