Surprisingly, I don't have much to say except for The Break Up both made me sob and angered me.
They fight and Kurt banishes him from his apartment. And yet, Blaine stays like the stubborn jerk that he is. Kurt hates that he's stubborn. He's already cheated on him, hung him out to dry like freshly washed clothes. Why does he need to stay?
Blaine doesn't go far, merely slamming Kurt's bedroom door shut and plopping himself down at the piano bench in the main living space. Kurt wants to yell at him to go, but can't force the words out of his mouth.
Kurt can't help but think that they should be slamming his bedroom door shut for a different reason. Because Hurt has missed him desperately. He's desperate for Blaine's mouth to kiss ever inch of his body and make up for lost time.
Instead they're at a stalemate in a silent apartment with a piece of wood between them.
Kurt has slid down the door and sits at the foot of it, holding a fist to his mouth to contain his sob. He hears Blaine's feet brush up against the floor as he swings them beneath the piano bench. It's Kurt's only sense of how much time has passed.
Kurt wants to be okay with what Blaine did. He wants nothing more than to disregard all of this and just spend the short amount of time they have together.
But he just can't look past it. He can't justify it to himself in his head without any questions.
He hears Blaine's fingers start to move on the ivory keys, performing a simple scale. Kurt listens for a couple of bars, not for an reason in particular. He attempts to explain why he listens with saying that he wants a reason for Blaine to stay a little longer.
But Kurt knows that it's not right.
"Leave, Blaine! Now!" Kurt shouts over Blaine's playing. The scale stops abruptly halfway through. The apartment is once again silent. Kurt listens hard for any movement of doors closing, but to no avail. Kurt wonders how long Blaine's stubbornness will hold out until he leaves for good...
Then he hears more notes emit from Blaine's fingers. They're slow, the same key pressed over and over again like a timer counting down. Then a few more are added, combining together to make a very familiar melody played over and over.
Teenage Dream has never sounded more haunting.
The short sample of the song continues to spread around the room, coming through Kurt's closed door. Kurt reaches for the door knob above him and quietly turns it to open the door just a crack. He sees Blaine's back, hunched over the piano with his arms slightly moving to play. He used to love watching Blaine play any musical instrument really. He would sit next to him and watch his fingers pluck or play out scales or random little melodies Blaine thinks up on the spot. Sometimes Blaine would whisper words to himself, ones he came up with himself or the lyrics of an actual song and being at peace with the world.
It's one of the many simple pleasures that Kurt is going to miss.
Just when Kurt starts thinking about Blaine singing does he hear the words that go with the repeating melody that have defined him and Blaine since they met on that staircase at Dalton.
You think I'm pretty, without any make up on
You think I'm funny, when I tell the punchline wrong
I know you get me, so I let my walls come down.
Down.
This is the most emotional song he's ever heard Blaine sing. More than Somewhere Only We Know or anything of that nature. It's slightly off key as Kurt can assume he's been crying at that piano bench. The song is sung slowly, like the words are being savoured on Blaine's tongue.
Before you met me, I was alright
But things were kind of heavy, you brought me to life
Now every February, you'll be my Valentine.
Valentine.
Kurt stands and opens the door a little wider to let his whole head pop out of his room. No, he's not going to let Blaine's serenade change his mind. It's just a song that happens to have a lot of emotional meaning to both people.
Let's go all the way tonight
No regrets, just love.
We can dance, until we die
You and I, we'll be young forever.
But there's so many regrets tonight. There's regrets in both Blaine and Kurt's hearts that may or may not be permanent. And there's no love. If there was love, Blaine would have waited to see Kurt. He would have waited to make love to Kurt. Nevertheless, Kurt steps out and closer to Blaine, some unnamed force attracting and pulling him out. He's unsure what he's really doing; if he's kicking them out of going to comfort him.
He hopes it's the former.
You make me, feel like I'm living a teenage dream
The way you turn me on
I can't sleep, let's run away and don't ever look back
Don't ever look back.
That's one of the phrases that Blaine kept using. Don't ever look back. Blaine said he was holding Kurt back from a wonderful life by being dead weight in Lima. Blaine said to not look back, but to look forward to the future. It was a sweet sentiment until Blaine's phone pinged with yet another text from Blaine's hook up guy. Kurt hasn't bothered to learn his name. Now Blaine's sweet sentiment just seems like a lie.
We drove to Cali, and got drunk on the beach
Got a motel and built a fort out of sheets.
I finally found you, my missing puzzle piece.
I'm complete.
Blaine's voice break at 'I'm complete'. Kurt has to hold back another sob. Blaine is beating himself up over this as part of Kurt believes he should be. And yet, there's another part that has compassion for him...
Without realizing it, Kurt is standing next to the bench, His eyes follow his ex boyfriend's fingers across the planes of ivory.
Let's go all the way tonight
No regrets, just love
We can dance, until we die
You and I, we'll be young forever.
Kurt remains to be in love with this guy. Despite his flaws and his hardships, Kurt stills continues to love him. He's not sure if he's insane or just in an emotional state right now. Kurt's not sure how long this feeling is going to last. He wants to remember it, knowing he'll start to lose it once Blaine is gone.
Kurt sits next to Blaine, careful not to disrupt the melody. He places a comforting hand on Blaine's forearm, feeling that flexing and unflexing of the muscles under his fingers. Blaine does not react.
You make me, feel like I'm living a teenage dream
The way you turn me on
I can't sleep, let's run away and don't ever look back.
Don't ever look back.
My heart stops, when you look at me.
Just one touch, now baby I believe.
This is real
So take a chance and don't ever look back.
Don't ever look back.
Tears start to fall from Blaine's eyes and his voice starts to crack. Kurt watches him with concern."Blaine, you can stop."
Blaine sniffs a couple of times which throws off his singing a little, but Blaine continues, despite Kurt's wishes.
"Stop, Blaine. Stop." Kurt's not entirely sure what he's trying to get Blaine to stop doing.
Imma get your heart racing, in my skin tight jeans
Be your teenage dream tonight.
Let you put your hands on me, in my skin tight jeans.
Be your teenage dream tonight.
A sob escapes Blaine's lips in the form of the word tonight, but Blaine continues his performance for no one but himself. Kurt's concerning instincts are taking over and completely disregarding the wall of their separation. He puts both his hands over Blaine's to stop them from moving any further into the song which causes a sharp noise as the song comes to a halt.
"Please, Blaine. Just go home. Go be happy." Kurt whispers. He watches Blaine hesitantly. There's a brief pause of nothing between them, Blaine's fingers slightly curling under Kurt's palms. Then Blaine shakes his head and his hands slip out from under Kurt's. He moves to play the remainder of the song in a different key.
Kurt makes no move to stop him again.
You make me feel like I'm living a teenage dream
The way you turn me
I can't sleep, let's run away and don't ever look back
Don't ever look back.
My heart stops, when you look at me.
Just one touch, now baby I believe
This is real.
So take a chance and don't ever look back.
Don't ever look back.
Imma get your heart racing, in my skin tight jeans
Be your teenage dream tonight
Let you put your hands on me, in my skin tight jeans
Be your teenage dream tonight.
And then Blaine collapses, his shoulders slump and his forehead hits the keys. All that can be heard in the apartment is the muffled sobs of Blaine Anderson.
Kurt's hand rubs up and down Blaine's back comfortingly. "No matter what, Blaine, it's always going to be you. I'm always going to love you."
Blaine says nothing.
You know the drill. Review and favourite because I'm Canadian and audd a 'u' tuo everyuthing.