V.I.P.
Very Idiotic Person
I don't own this game
"Sir,do you want good news or bad news?" Gaz asked. "Uhhhhh..."
(10 Minutes later)
"Uhhh..." Price was uncertain. Gaz banged his head against the wall and was crying. "Good news, Gaz." Price finally answered. Gaz looked up happy in a retarded kind of way and began to speak. "The world's in bad shape-" Gaz started but was cut off by Captain Price "Wait, I thought the Earth was round?" Gaz sighed and banged his head on the wall again making a dent. "Ouch" The wall snapped. "Shut up, wall." Gaz shot back. "We got 15,000 nukes and a civil war in the Middle East-" Gaz was cut off again by Price "When you mean civil, as in red vs. blue?" "Never mind" Gaz smashed his head against the wall and breaking it into two. "MY LEGS! YOU SOB" The wall screamed at Gaz and was pissed. "I said shut UP, WALL" Gaz was also pissed at the wall. "We got a new guy and he's got the minerals." "Oh hell no." Price was pissed now and everybody gang-bashed the wall for some reason. Everybody looked up to the direction of the screams of the wall. "Poor wall." Some one said.
V.I.P.
Credenhill, UK
Sgt. 'Soap' MacTavish
22nd SAS Regiment
"Goooooooood day." Gaz said in a cherry tone. 'Soap' went up to him and taped his mouth. "Ok, Gaz what do we do now?" 'Soap' asked the taped. Gaz just pointed at the G36C on the table. "What?" 'Soap' looked in the direction of the rifle and picked it up, turning off the safety lock in the process and spraying it all over Gaz but misses him. "You idiot." Gaz mumbled with the tape still on. "What was that?" 'Soap' looked confused. Gaz ripped off the tape and pointed to the rifle range. 'Soap' went there and started going into the range. "Come back here." Gaz said . 'Soap' went back got another tape and slammed it on Gaz's mouth. Gaz just pressed buttons breaking the machine and a few targets popped out scaring 'Soap'. "What the hell, man?" 'Soap' was now pissed and went to the broken wall on the floor. He fired the G36C at the wall and afterwards, began to punch and kick at it. Somehow the wall managed to respond and gave 'Soap' the finger. "That's it" He broke into the armory and used the minigun at the wall. "DIE!" He yelled taking his anger on it. Gaz ripped off the tape "'Soap'! Get your ass over here!" 'Soap' threw the minigun at the wall and picked up the USP.45 "Switch to your rifle then switch to your pistol." 'Soap did the two. "Now, target practice the wall." "Oh shit!" The wall began to run around the training camp with 'Soap' in tow. "Idiot." Gaz chuckled and went to Hanger 1. 'Soap' chased the wall and pinned it to the ground. "Please. Don't shoot me." The wall said. "Just die." 'Soap' shot the wall in the supposed head. He walked to Hanger 1 and did not know that he would face with a tougher soldier. "Go easy on him sir." Gaz said. "Heeeeeeey Gaz!" 'Soap' was in a good mood but Gaz taped his mouth making 'Soap' pissed agian and taking it out on the television. The others sweat dropped as 'Soap' started cutting the television into little pieces. "'SOAP'!" Price bellowed making 'Soap' hide behind the broken tele. "Climb up the ladder and grab what you need." 'Soap' climbed up and got the MP5 and two flashbangs. "On my go storm to position 1 then to number two then to number 6 and finish by drop-kicking yourself. Gaz holds the record for 10 hours. Cricket silence. "Uhh Price? You mean 19 seconds? Sir?" Gaz whispered. 'Soap' fell down laughing and the rest snickered. "Oh. Right, Gaz holds the record for 19 hours." Price chipped in the laughter and went to the tele to watch some Top Gear. "This is some cool bugger. I gotta get one of those." Price muttered and the rest crowded around him. "Piss off ya lil' buggers." Price was annoyed at personal space and tried to get far away. "On my go." 'Soap' readied himself and slid down the rope before Price said go. 'Soap' was halfway down when Price screamed at him and made him loose his balance. Falling down and Gaz was screwing around with the buttons again making it go haywire. "Damn it man you scared me!" 'Soap' said and tore down the whole exercise field while shooting all the targets before drop-kicking himself on to the circle. "Bullseye!" 'Soap' said and went to play with the switches. "Right... we are going in to a ship but since 'SOAP' here tore down the course, we are now going into the ship." On. Off. On. Off. "'SOAP'! Stop playing with the switches." Price bellowed but this time 'Soap' just walked out and took all his anger on the wall again. "What the bloody hell is wrong with you? I'm a human!" The wall shouted. 'Soap' jusmped up and ran away. "Zombie!"