Disclaimer: I don't own Hogan's Heroes or any of the characters. This story takes place before "A Dark Night, Long Ago".
"That's three new barracks buildings going up. So if each one's going to hold the same number of men as the existing huts, we're talking between forty-five and fifty extra prisoners."
Colonel Hogan, the senior officer of the prisoners of war at Stalag Luft 13, leaned against the end wall of Barracks 2, in the company of his four most trusted subordinates. From here, only one of the new huts could be seen, a skeletal framework of timbers whose structural integrity made the older ones look master-built. From behind the rows of barracks, the sound of hammering indicated work in progress.
"They've almost finished that end one," observed Newkirk, jerking his head towards the source of the noise. "I shouldn't be surprised if it's just about done by knock-off time, all but putting the bunks in. Klink hasn't said anything yet, has he, Colonel?"
"No. I asked him what the new buildings were for, and all he said was that when I needed to know, I'd be advised."
"Well, maybe they aren't barracks." This came from Carter. "Maybe they're gonna use 'em for storage or something."
"I don't think so," said Hogan. "If they had nothing to do with the prisoners, Klink would have told me fast enough. Anyway, they're too close to the other barracks to be anything else."
Newkirk shrugged. "So we're getting new residents. Well, that should spice up the darts championships a bit. But why are you so worried about it, Colonel? The Jerries are always sending more prisoners here."
"Not usually in wholesale quantities. You know the score here, Newkirk. Every guy that comes through that gate has to be checked, and rechecked, until we're absolutely sure he can be trusted. We can't take any chances on the Krauts slipping in an informant on us. Checking fifty new men all at once is going to take a lot of time and effort, and interfere with operations."
"Maybe they won't all arrive at once," said Kinch. "The Krauts are putting all their energy into finishing that end hut. My guess is, we'll get a full complement for that one as soon as it's finished, then they'll get on with the next one."
"Which means the whole process drags on for weeks," replied Hogan. "That doesn't make it any better. And who's to say Klink will put all of 'em in one barracks? He might decide to move some of the old prisoners into the new building, to make room in the existing huts for the newcomers, which will just spread the problem around. We don't need security risks all over camp, not with everything we've got going on."
The discussion broke off at the approach of Schultz, the German sergeant of the guard. "Colonel Hogan, the Kommandant wants to see you in his office," he said.
"Yeah, okay, Schultz," replied Hogan, but he didn't move.
"He said to come right away. If it's not inconvenient," added Schultz deprecatingly. He had lost money at the previous night's blackjack game, and was anxious to defer payment by staying on Hogan's good side. But Kommandant Klink, who could order a transfer to the Russian Front for any of his men at any time, had to be kept sweet as well.
"What's it about, Schultzie?" asked LeBeau. "Didn't Klink tell you?"
"He never tells me anything," said Schultz. "It's better that way. If I know nothing, I can't be blamed for it when it happens."
"You just keep believing that, Schultz," replied Hogan with a grin. "I'd better go see what kind of nothing Klink's got on his mind. Kinch, why don't you put the coffee pot on?" He zipped up the front of his jacket, and set off briskly towards the Kommandantur.
"A very good idea," remarked Schultz. "It has been cold this morning, a cup of coffee would just hit the..."
"No, Schultz," said Kinch, as he followed his pals into the barracks, and closed the door.
They had good reason for keeping Schultz out of their Kaffeeklatsch. What came out of the coffee pot in Hogan's quarters wasn't coffee. Inside its scratched and dented shell was hidden the receiver for the listening device they had installed in the Kommandant's office, and as Kinch plugged it in, and LeBeau laid the speaker on the desk, Hogan's voice came through: "You wanted to see me, Colonel?"
"Ah, yes, Hogan, come in. I wanted to talk to you about the new buildings. You will have noticed that the first one is almost ready for occupation. And I'm sure you've already worked out what that means."
"You're sub-letting? Golly, that's pretty enterprising, Colonel. Neat idea, though - the way things are going, the Luftwaffe probably needs the extra cash to replace the planes our guys keep shooting down."
"Very amusing, Hogan." Klink's voice took on an edge. "The new huts are being built to accommodate additional prisoners - Americans, your fellow servicemen, captured by our superior German forces. The first contingent will arrive here on Friday morning. Fourteen men, fresh from transit camp. That's not so funny, is it?"
"Actually, I think it's great," said Hogan, in a bright, enthusiastic tone. "The escape committee's been complaining for weeks about how they just keep getting the same tired old ideas in the suggestions box. Maybe these new guys'll freshen things up a bit."
"Is that so? Hogan, if you think I'm worried about your ridiculous escape committee...well...well, there had better not be any trouble, otherwise there will be consequences."
The listeners exchanged grins. Baiting the Kommandant was easy, effective, and the best fun men in their situation could hope to get.
"You know, I sometimes think Klink actually believes in the escape committee," said Newkirk. "Probably thinks there's a Father Christmas, and all."
His buddies snickered, but Klink was still speaking. "I will give you fair warning, Hogan, my guards have been ordered to be extra vigilant. And I suggest you make it quite clear to these new prisoners that Stalag 13 is escape-proof, and that any attempts to prove otherwise will be met with the most severe punishment."
"Don't you worry , Colonel. By the end of the week, they'll be as clued up about that as all the other men," replied Hogan cheerfully. "Especially if you spread 'em out among the barracks. That's the best way for them to learn, if you ask me."
"Oh, I'm sure it is. The best way to learn insolence, insubordination, and disorderly conduct. Well, forget it. The new men will all be kept together in Barracks 18, away from any bad influences."
"Why can't I learn to keep my big mouth shut?" grumbled Hogan, as if he hadn't just gotten the exact result he was hoping for. "You win again, Kommandant. Anything else?"
"No, that's all. But I expect you to be on hand when the new men arrive. Dismissed,"
Kinch unplugged the coffee pot. "Well, that's it. Fourteen of 'em, and more on the way."
"All Americans, too," remarked Newkirk sourly, as he lit a cigarette. "Well, they might be all right, or they might be dodgy. But one thing I can tell you right now."
"What's that?" asked Carter, gazing at him in puzzled wonder.
Newkirk took a deep lungful of smoke, and let it out before he replied: "They'll be no bloody use at all for the cricket team."