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The leaves crunched beneath Sully's feet as he took to the woods to ease his pain. The sun shone brightly through the dense trees, but he barely noticed. If only I had tried to make her listen to my side! What is I had been more sensitive to her feelings, rather than thinking she would understand. Sully smacked his hand against a nearby tree. Closing his eyes, he leaned against the tree and sighed. He knew it was no use dwelling on if onlys. What had been done and said, there was no changing. Thinking about it would only make him feel worse and it would not heal the wounds.
Sully groaned as he sank to the ground. His aching legs told him that he had walked several hours since he had left Michaela. Looking around, he didn't recognize the area, but he guessed he was somewhere north of the reservation. When he had left Michaela, he had just kept on walking, trying to forget his pain and search for the answers. Still he couldn't keep his mind from wandering back over the events of the past few days since Catherine had come. Why couldn't Michaela understand that he loved her and her only? Didn't she trust him? Was her jealousy a sign that she did love him and was afraid of losing him? Was something keeping her from trusting him? If now she would fly off the handle at a simple friendship with another woman, what about later on as their relationship deepened? Couldn't Michaela see that he had only felt sorry for Catherine, and had only tried to make her feel safe and understood? Catherine had been so frightened. She couldn't speak English and she hadn't seen a white person in several years. She had needed someone who could understand; who had been there. It wasn't his fault that she a misunderstood his friendship! She had been so starved of love and affection that she took his caring for love. He had no feelings for her in that way! He never had and he never would! He had only tried to be her friend. But Michaela, Sully groaned, what she mean that I didn't understand? Understand what? What did she need time to think, to be alone? Was she ending their courtship? Was she through? Didn't she love him? Was he only fooling himself with a dream?
Sullyslowly got to his feet. After stretching a moment, he turned toward the setting sun. Then glancing to the south, he was again reminded of how much he missed Cloud Dancing. He longed to talk to the older medicine man and glean wisdom and understanding from him. Cloud Dancing didn't always have the answers but he always knew how to help Sully find the right ones. Finally, Sully squared his shoulders. He turned back to the western horizon. He loved Michaela; that's what would always matter. Nothing would ever change his feelings for her. Tomorrow would be a new day and then he would begin his journey to the north, to find Cloud Dancing, and to begin his vision quest to find his way again. Only then would he fing peace and understanding. And then, he would find a way to win back the woman he loved. /span/p