Seducing Gourry

Summary: After another "jellyfish" remark by Gourry on her body, Lina's done playing nice. That is, if she ever did... Oh, no, this calls for war! LG, with minor AZ.

Disclaimer: Slayers does not belong to me. If I were actually the owner I have no idea why I'd be writing fanfiction.

Prologue

There were moments between them – absolutely perfect, fleeting moments of tenderness and affection, where he would give her words of comfort and she would embrace him. These were the moments where it was as though they were the only two people in the world. They were rare, beautiful moments.

This was not one of them.

"Gourry!" Lina yelled, as she violently stabbed her fork into her food, "Just because I don't have disturbingly large breasts doesn't mean I can't be sexy!"

"Well, I didn't say that. I just said that you had a small chest." Gourry took a sip of water, unfazed, as if he didn't understand why Lina was so mad. And he probably didn't.

"Please… Ms. Lina…!"Amelia whimpered. If Lina blew anything up, the bill was going straight to her daddy, the prince of Seyruun. Not to mention the inn would probably kick them out…

All Zelgadis did was sigh. If he wasn't before, he was quickly becoming apathetic towards Lina and Gourry's "lover's quarrels."

How they got on the subject was unknown to all, as Lina didn't want to remember, Gourry forgot, Amelia couldn't hear over their vicious munching on food, and Zelgadis didn't care to hear.

Lina tempestuously stood for emphasis, and gave Gourry her evil glare(TM), simply waiting for him to dare say one more thing…

He looked up after feasting some more on his meal. "Lina, why are you so angry?"

Amelia promptly hid under the table and Zelgadis scooted his seat farther away.

That was it! Lina's hands and eyes twitched in agitation, but due to some miracle, after taking a deep breath, she simply stomped up to her room.

After a minute or two and no explosion, Amelia sat back down in her seat. She was initially relieved and shocked by the lack of destruction, but she figured that it was one of those occasions where Lina was so frustrated that she couldn't even concentrate enough to cast magic.

….

And Amelia was staying in the same room as Lina tonight. She covered her face with her hands in a way that made her look as though she were sobbing.

Gourry obliviously reached for some of Lina's leftovers.

Zelgadis contemplating jumping off a cliff.

Back in her room, Lina buried herself in the sheets of her bed. Over the past few years she traveled with Gourry, sometimes Gourry exclusively, she had always been at the mercy of his seemingly spontaneous comments on her lack of sexiness. They could be fighting bandits and he would even say something arbitrarily.

But yet there were all these times where he would say things, like that he would protect her for the rest of his life, or that he liked it when it was just the two of them… He'd even said some slightly suggestive things to her on occasion. Her mind tried to justify all of these situations as Gourry not realizing what he's saying.

She let out a groan of frustration into her pillow.

Although she would never admit it to herself, she had often wondered if she lov—

No!

... "Liked" her dimwitted, annoyingly handsome, master swordsman of a friend. She also wondered if Gourry was secretly an evil genius that knew how much he was confusing and upsetting her.

Wait, that sounds way too much like Xellos.

But… The moment she thinks "those three words," it'll be the moment she becomes weak and vulnerable. Her heart couldn't be broken as long as she didn't think "those three words," right?

It didn't help that one moment could be interpreted as undying, romantic love and the next as just a friend. Or, dear lord no, a brother.

She wasn't sure why this particular time was any different from any other time he joked about her looks, or lack thereof, but she really wanted to cry. (And she hated herself wanting to.) She liked to blame it on the possibility of her "time of the month" approaching, making her all emotional and pathetic…

Lina's stomach made growling noises. She had only eaten half of her meal to feed approximately 11 starving children, and thus she felt like she was starving, herself, and like hell she was going back down there. Gourry probably ate all of her food anyway.

She stiffened as she heard the door open.

"Ms… Lina?" Amelia said nervously. If she wanted to sleep peacefully, she had to comfort Lina. Besides, it was also the just thing to do! "Do you want to talk, or something?"

There was silence. Amelia sat on the side of her bed, facing Lina.

"You know… Ms. Lina…" Amelia gulped. She knew her next words were risky. "Mr. Gourry never said he didn't think you were sexy…"

Lina shot up. "Amelia!" She knew Amelia was just trying to help, so she fell back down into her bed.

"It's just…" Lina continued, but she turned herself away from Amelia, blushing. "He always implies it!"

Amelia smiled slightly. Lina rarely confided in her like this. Gourry was the one who Lina turned to for support, but obviously she couldn't on an issue like this. Lina usually kept these feelings to herself anyway. Maybe this was just another effect of pent up frustration? She paused as she thought of what to say next, when she got an idea…

She had been an avid supporter of their relationship since the moment she met them, and this was the perfect opportunity for justice to deliver these two people a romantic, happy ending!

"Ms. Lina!" She stood up, simply striking a pose, as there was nowhere to climb any higher in the room and thus this would suffice. "How about you try to seduce Mr. Gourry!"

"WHAT?!"

"Yes! Make him finally face his love for you! Awaken his male desires!" As she said these crazy things, her poses grew more and more dramatic.

Male desires!!!

"And how do you suppose I do that?!" Lina jumped up from bed and grabbed Amelia by the collar of her shirt.

Amelia timorously continued. "E-Easy! I'll help you! We could try something different each day! Together, we can…" Amelia struggled to think of a word that would please and convince Lina to go along with it. "We can exact revenge on Mr. Gourry's words… for the sake of justice!" Amelia quickly added the justice part after realizing how unjust revenge is.

Revenge…

Lina let Amelia go. She calmly walked over towards the mirror, placing one hand on her hips and the other on her head. She smiled wickedly.

"Oh… it's on!"

"Yes!" Amelia cheered. But then she thought of how much trouble she potentially got herself into, and she let out a nervous laugh.

Lina transformed all of her violently negative energy into a violently positive energy. Both her hands were now in fists, and her eyes were like fire, and could probably burn anyone who looked into them. She was determined to make Gourry eat his own words. By the end of this he would be at her mercy! Oh, how Lina loved power!

"Okay Amelia! Let's get planning!"

"R-Right!"

Gourry's gonna regret saying all those things about me!

Author's notes: It starts! Thanks for reading. This is my first fanfic (I'm completely new to all of this), but by no means go easy on me for that reason. (Just be nice and constructive about it!) I'm sorry if there's any similar fics out there, I swear I've read 38475934857 L/G fics and nothing like this. If you have any questions, feel free to ask, but I already anticipate someone asking me about the timeline. To be quite honest, I'm not entirely sure, but I really don't think it matters. I'm not sure if it's wise for an author to admit this, but a majority of this story is completely unplanned, and if the situation calls for a decision (like if Gourry fights I need to decide what sword he uses), you'll get it. Don't worry.

I swear on my life I'll complete this fic, but I might be slow updating thanks to school. I already have the first chapter ready, but I don't want to post it all at once.

So, until next time…!