One fine morning in Death City, a certain grim reaper was taking a shower in his perfectly symmetrical bathroom. No matter how relaxing the water was, Kid was troubled and his head was filled with thoughts of recent events. A month ago, Crona confessed his love for me. A week ago, Maka grabbed me in the hallway and kissed me full-on the lips. Yesterday, Patty jumped me and almost raped me! Kid wasn't really interested in romantic relationships, with men or women. He just wanted to make his own perfect death-scythe shotguns and carry on his life doing the respected duties of a full-fledged grim reaper. Plus, no one could really meet the requirements of Kid's significant other: perfect symmetry, flawless skin, limitless power...
Kid sighed. He shut off the water and stepped onto the bathroom mat, drying himself off with a black and white towel. As he was drying his hair, he turned to see his face in the mirror. After who-knows-how-long, he caught himself staring deeply into his own shimmering, golden eyes. He shook his head. But then he looked back. He just couldn't get over how perfectly his golden eyes went with his raven-black hair, and how perfectly his slender chest was sculpted, and how that manly V shape in his hips perfectly complimented his long, thick manho-
WAIT. What? Kid closed his eyes and wrapped his towel firmly around his waist. Did I just think that? Did I just fantasize about... myself?! He kept his eyes closed and thought about this for a moment. Of course. He opened his eyes and stood tall in front of the full-body mirror, hands on hips. He met his own eyes. The only person alive on the planet that could ever please me, ever be exactly what I want in a relationship, mentally and physically...is me.
He smirked. After admiring his perfection for even longer, allowing his imagination to run wild, his mind was suddenly full of ideas, and his towel had an impressively large tent in it.
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