The Talk

Danny pulled his car onto his father's drive with what felt like the whole world was sitting on his shoulders. He knew that he had messed up. And not just a little. His family and more so his mother had always warned him that one day his temper would get him into trouble and he knew that he was now neck deep in it. He was surprised that IA wasn't breathing down his neck demanding for his badge.

Knowing that he needed to get back to the station to try to clean up his mess, he quickly got out of his car collecting the meat that he had collected for Sunday dinner and headed towards his father's home. Hoping that he had missed his father and he could get in, put the meat away and head back without being told how much he had disappointed his father.

"Anybody home?" Danny called as he opened the door and headed through the quiet house. But as he got to the kitchen he found his father making a fresh pot of coffee. He wanted to disappear into the wall but knew from past experience that it was better just to face his father than just give his father more time to build his disappointment. "Hey, Dad."

"Hey," Frank answered in reply before abandoning his coffee and turned to face his eldest founding his arms across his chest. He carefully watched his eldest as he moved towards the fridge before placing the meat onto the only clear shelf.

"I got the meat here from Eddie's for tomorrow," Danny said and as he closed the fridge he turned to his father. "Linda says you should probably take it out about two hours before you go to mass."

At that, he moved towards the door but felt his father's sharp eyes on him. He stopped just before he got to the door and turned to face his father. He knew by the look that his father had heard about what had happened. How could he not? He knew that he had crossed a line with what he did. But he didn't feel guilty for what he did as he had gotten a little girl home to her family, however, the animal that had taken her might walk due to his actions.

"I guess you heard," Danny said after a sigh. He knew what was coming, his father didn't need to raise his voice to tell him that he was angry. It was written all over his face, mixed with disappointment.

"Not the best news," Frank replied carefully trying to read his son.

As a child, Danny was the hardest to read out of all his children. Jamie and Joe had been the easiest to read. They both had a clear tell of which had slowly become less visible as they learned to hide it but as children both himself and his wife could tell what they were thinking. Erin also had a tell, but she had learned quicker than her brothers and had been able to hide it at the age of ten.

On the other hand, Danny, even before his police and marine training, had always been hard to read. Danny had learned from his grandfather and his father, that the way to live and deal with the world was to hide his emotions and bury them.

Even though Frank had learned that he had to create an escape to deal with what he saw, Danny was so similar to his father. Henry was as stubborn as a bull, and Danny was the same. But they both had a lot of hurts hidden in them. And the one output they both had was collect all that pain and release it when their anger got too much.

It had been Henry's anger that had lost him his job and had forced him to retire, and Frank was worried that one day, Danny's anger would get the better of him and he would do something very stupid. Like what he had done. The thick Irish temper was clear in his eldest and it would also be his main problem in dealing with the day to day life as a cop.

Danny sighed again, knowing what his father meant. He also knew that from the minute his father had seen him, he had been watched not by his father's eyes but the eyes of an NYPD former detective.

"No. CSU scoured the van." Danny started, knowing that his father would want a report on his case. And more so when he knew that he was facing an investigation from internal affairs because of his actions.

Danny moved back into the room and leant against the wall to his left. "No fibres, not a single hair. Guess I screwed up, huh?"

Danny knew that he had screwed up in how he handled the case, but at the same time he had been running out of time. There had been a little girl that would die unless they found her soon. And he was ready to take any punishment that the police department gave him as long as he got his man.

"Internal Affairs is gonna have to get into this," Frank warned, knowing that with Danny's history, the case would be very strong for Internal Affairs in favour of Danny losing his badge and even looking at prison time.

Danny looked down at his feet before looking back at his father. "Just so you know, Demarcus had nothing to do with it. I told him to call it in."

Danny knew that with his actions; Internal Affairs would more likely want to question his partner and possible blame him from not stopping him. He had told Demarcus to call it in, leaving him alone with Banse. He knew that what he had planned to get Banse to talk wouldn't be legal, and Demarcus was a good cop and partner who didn't need to get caught up with his mistakes.

"This whole thing will go down a lot easier if you nail this guy," Frank said, voicing the opinion as both a father and as a boss. Frank knew that with the killer behind bars, it would help Danny's case. It wouldn't stop him from facing consequences for his actions but it may save his badge.

"I know that Dad but I got nothing" Danny explained, knowing that a hint of annoyance was in his voice. He was annoyed at the whole situation, and at himself.

Frank paused for second thinking over the whole crime from the reports he had gotten. There was one thing that kept appearing in his mind. "Guy had a ritual."

At his father's words, Danny answered. "Yeah, I mean, he had the candles, the dress, the communion thing, but that's it." It made him feel a little sick thinking about what the guy had planned for Teresa. As a father, he wished he had been allowed to make the man hurt as much as Teresa's family did.

"Well, maybe you should run it through ViCAP, see if there're any cold cases with the same MO? Just because the guy doesn't have a record, doesn't mean he didn't do it." Frank added thinking back to what he would do if he was still a detective.

Danny thought about his father's words. It made sense. And hope that he might get his man had started to build again in his gut. "Right. Because you don't just wake up one day at 50 and become a pervert." He added.

Thinking over his case, it had been too perfect. Too perfect for a man who, according to his file, was his first offence. He had to have done it before. Which sadly meant that other little girls would have died because of Banse.

"That's a welcome relief," Frank said looking away at his son's words.

"Thanks, chief," Danny said as he pushed himself off the wall and headed towards the door.

"Danny, you ever see that doctor?" Frank called. Danny had just reached the door he was stopped by his father's words, he turned to face his father knowing what he was getting at. He had been waiting for this conversation to happen. But he still didn't know how to answer his father without showing him any emotion.

"Well, you know, I've been busy Dad." And he wasn't lying. Not completely as he had been busy with work and his family. But at the same time, he didn't want to go anywhere near his time overseas. Not anytime soon anyway.

"There's no shame talking about what went on in Iraq," Frank said looking directly at Danny. He knew that Danny was still dealing with whatever had happened overseas, but like before his son was so good at hiding his emotions that he was hard to crack. He knew that the son he had said goodbye to at the airport when he had left for Iraq was not the same son he had gotten back.

War had changed him as it had him. But it was different now, Frank was the father carefully watching his son slowly destruct with all the pain he was holding in. He just wished that his son would come to him, come to him for help. But that wouldn't happen with Danny. The only one that Danny, he thought would trust and would go to for help was Henry. If he ever did.

Danny pulled his lips inwards before answering, he didn't want to get into this now. Or ever. "I'll get around to it." It was his way of stopping his father from questioning him more or pushing the issue. Danny looked back at the fridge and pointed at it. "Don't forget about the meat."

And with that Danny quickly turned and left the house. Frank sighed and looked down at the ground. He wished that he had his wife still with them. After every fight he had ever had with Danny, Mary had been the one that had sat him down and talked to him about how Danny was very much like him with the way he was acting and how they would deal with him the next day.

He missed her, and Joe so much. And he had promised himself and his late wife that he wouldn't let the pains of war destroy their eldest. Not if he had anything to do with it.