Dead Letters by Opal Shadow
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Disclaimer: I don't own YGO
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Dead Letters
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"A Dead Letter is a letter that has never been delivered because the person to whom it was written cannot be found, and it also cannot be returned to the person who wrote it." The Rasmus
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??? POVCan I tell you a secret?
But you must promise not to tell anyone...
I'm not meant to read the dead letters, but I figured, no one is ever gonna receive them, and besides, they're letters. They were written to be read...
You see, around a month ago I received a new job, at the Post Office. I was put in charge of lost or misplaced letters.
It was during my first week that I received my first Dead Letter.
I felt enormous pity for the person who had sent the letter, and also an overwhelming curiosity. Surely it wouldn't hurt anyone if I took a quick look at what was in it...
Right?
I quickly scanned the address.
Mr Ryou Bakura
And that was it. No address, just a name.
For some reason that made me feel sad. Sad that whoever had sent this letter didn't know where this 'Mr Ryou Bakura' was, but sent it anyway, only for it to never reach them and never be returned...
I opened it and started to read...
Dear Ryou,
I'm sorry.
It has taken this to happen for me to finally swallow my pride and apologise for everything I have ever put you through. But, as always, I'm just too late...
At long last, you gathered all your courage and left me. For a better existence and a peaceful eternity, complete with all your fulfilling dreams that I broke. If anybody ought to have it, it's you...
I made your life a living hell. I made you pay in bruises for my mistakes. I made you pay in blood for my stubbornness and stupidity. I made you pay in pain for my bitterness. But most of all, I made what should have been an amazing chance at getting to know you, my other half, a horror. I took all my failures out on you.
I'm so sorry; I don't know where to begin asking for forgiveness. I don't even know how I can even try!
...But, you always did, didn't you? No matter how much pain I put you through, how many soul-tearing situations I threw you into, you always found it in your pure heart to forgive everything and defend me against the Pharaoh and his gang. But I'll never know if you forgave me for what I did.
I can still remember waking up the next morning after that night I was drunk and had given you your nightly beating. Finding you there, your cold cheeks still wet with tears, a small smile on your face, your body bruised. I realise now that that was the only time I had ever seen you smile.
You just lay there, Ryou, unmoving, limp and deaf to my cries of horror, of despair and of anger. You ignored my threats to hurt you if you didn't wake up. You never woke...
I had taken the abuse too far and your body gave up. I killed you and I'll never know if you managed to find it in your heart in the last few breaths of life that you had to forgive me.
You were dead, and yet...
You managed to remain enchanting in even death, mocking me with what I had lost.
And that message you left me, lying innocently on your bed, scrawled messily with the urgency of limited time. I kept it, Ryou, and I read it every night to remind myself of how I failed you. How I was supposed to protect you.
But now I no longer read it because I remember it off by heart, its haunting words of pain forever engrained into my mind... my soul. I cried that night too, when I realised that you weren't going to get up and fix and bandage yourself up like all the other times I had hit you repeatedly...
Why? Ryou, dammit, why?!
Why did you choose that night to finally fight back?! When I was too drunk to realise that, at last, you had built up your bravery to resist me, something that I had longed for you to do. Why that night, when, instead of feeling pride in the fact that you had grown a backbone, I felt only drunken anger and the overwhelming urge to set you in your place. An urge that I gave into, as I hit you, kicked you and cursed your very existence. Your very life.
That was your strength. That was what people were jealous of in you. The fact that no matter what horrible things had happened in your life, you moved on and enjoyed all the little things in life... You considered yourself lucky and enjoyed life.
And I took that away from you.
Ironic that even though I was so drunk I can still remember the details of that night in my mind as if it had only just happened. I can still hear your cries of pain.
Ra, if my past self could see me right now, he would scorn me for even thinking of feeling guilt at what I did.
But you know what, Ryou? I don't care. You changed me, and I resented you for it, and I made you suffer for it, but I now realise what a gift you gave me... Ryou, my hikari, thank you. But, too late. Always too late.
I have only just managed to comprehend the fact that I'll never see you again. That the only ways I will ever gaze upon your beautiful face are through old photos. And even then, I will never see your smile again since you look so sad in all the recent photos. It hurts so much more than I ever thought it would.
And so, I am writing this letter because I know exactly what to do...
I will post it and return to our home. There, I will find the most recent photo of you and then, I will drink my home-made concoction to your freedom. My poison.
Maybe, in death I will get a glimpse of your smiling face for just one second before I go to hell.
Ryou, my light, this letter will never reach you but I will send it nonetheless, for the off-chance that fate may bring it to you.
Please look out for me.
Goodbye, aibou. My light.
Bakura.
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Um... yeah. . I really don't know where this came from, but I would be extremely happy if you press that little purple button below and review... please?