Hello! Ok so this is my first attempt at a states fic...Well one-shot for now... I wanted to try writing them since I always enjoy a good states fic... It was written from Minnesota's POV cause I'm from there and it was easier. It was super fun to write, and I hope that it's fun to read too! Let me know what you guys think, and if you have advice on how certain states should be let me know! (fifty states in all...it is hard to keep track of all the stereotypes!) Which reminds me, this fic is not meant to be offensive, its supposed to be entertaining, and the states are based off of stereotypes. (You can thank sebas-chan001 for California by the way. She says this, in her own words, "I accept frustrated private messages with open arms...bring it!").
Also, rated T just to be safe. This fic may have the title change in the future as well as possible future chapters (I'm not sure yet). Anyway enjoy!
Disclaimer: I don't own hetalia...still
It was a lovely summer morning, perfectly cool and looking to be a sunny day. There was just a small breeze going, and all else was calm. Minnesota stood on the shore of the lake, bare feet in the water, coffee in hand and a smile on her face. She took a sip of the hot liquid, tasting the coca that was mixed in with it. The birds were chirping happily amongst themselves and everything was quite peaceful. What a perfect morning. And the start of a lovely day, perfect for an outdoor barbeque! She thought to herself.
"Are you going to stand out here all day?" The voice came from one of her siblings from behind her, she turned and took a sip of her coffee, while also raising an eyebrow.
"Perhaps, I haven't decided yet." She smiled at one of her brothers, Wisconsin. He had ear length curly blonde hair, blue eyes behind the glasses like Dad's, and a slightly impatient look on his face.
"Well, sorry, but you can't. We have to go the barbeque today." Wisconsin reminded her, rolling his eyes at his sister, "And you know how Texas is when people are late to things."
"It's been over a hundred years and you still don't know Texas is more bark than bite?" Minnesota teased, stepping out of the lake and into her flip flop sandals that were stuck in the grass above the sand.
"Not when it comes to barbeques!" Wisconsin grumbled, following Minnesota back into her house, "What are you bringing? I'm thinking a cheese plate or cheese curds maybe."
"I'm bringing hotdish and peanut butter bars." Minnesota gestured to the tins of food on the counter as they walked inside, she set her loon mug down (the coffee had gone cold anyway) and began shuffling around for her fishing pole.
"Hotdish, really? To a southern barbeque?" Wisconsin asked, peering into the tin of the top container aside and peering at the food inside.
"Yeah, why not?"
"You sure you want to?" He asked again, Minnesota nodded.
"You betcha I am!" She smiled, "You can't have a barbeque without some good old fashioned hotdish and bars, doncha know?"
Wisconsin rolled his eyes again, "Whatever, we do need to get going though."
Minnesota passed her pet loon, having changed into her usual brown boots and plaid top. Since it was hot today, she had the button up tied up higher, exposing a bit of her midriff. She pet the loon, Itasca, on the head with a soft pat as she hefted her fishing pole in one hand.
"Yeah, we should probably get going." Minnesota admitted, "Grab the goodies, k? I'll grab the keys."
"Just because it's your house doesn't mean you get to boss me around…." Wisconsin muttered under her breath and Minnesota shrugged again.
Minnesota drove to Texas's house relatively easy, if by easy you mean bickering with your brother over the music station that was currently playing. That and Wisconsin nearly spilled the tater-tot hotdish several times, but other than that the drive was peaceful.
Texas's driveway was packed with tons of cars, many of them parked along the road as well. Minnesota parked behind California's flashy car, and climbed out. She opted to leave her fishing pole in the car, for now, and took the dishes from Wisconsin.
"Hey! Look, there's North Dakota, I gotta to talk to her real quick. Catch up with ya later, Minnie!" Wisconsin said, running in the direction of the other sibling. Minnesota walked up to the front of the house, stopping for a moment to wonder if she should ring the doorbell. The door, however, swung open in front of her and Texas was revealed, giving her an amused look. He was wearing his usual cowboy boots, hat, and jeans with a red and blue t-shirt.
"Oh, Texas! Hey, how are ya doin?" She asked giving him a small smile.
"I'm fine Min! How 'er you?" Texas replied with a large grin on his face. "I'm so glad you could make it!"
"Yeah, me too…." Minnesota replied quietly, trying not to think of how it was the perfect day for fishing, "Oh, I ...uh… brought you some stuff!" She handed him the two tins.
"Well butter my biscuits!" Texas exclaimed, "Would ya look at that, you even brought some 'ere…. Um…" He began starting at the tins, tilting his head and trying to guess what was inside. "These 'ere casseroles! Thanks again little min! They do smell mighty fine, and I betcha a nickel that they taste even better!"
"Hotdish…" Minnesota whispered as Texas finished who then raised an eyebrow at her, "Oh and it's nothing, just whipped them up real quick this morning. Is everyone here then, any fights break out yet? I bet….um….I bet it's New York and Pennsylvania this time."
"Sure thing." Texas chuckled, "I don know about that fightin' business, but there's a game of bag toss in the backyard! Oh and if yer hankering for a drink, we got lemonade over there on the table, and the Cokes are in the cooler. Just help yourself!"
"Just Coke?" Minnesota laughed, "I thought you were a Dr. Pepper guy!" Texas chuckled at his sister.
"Oh bless your heart little min…" He said with a smile on his face, "I keep forgettin' you have a fancier name for Cokes. Why don't you come on in, I have to go check on the meat." Texas held the screen door open with his foot and waited for Minnesota to squeeze by.
Minnesota wandered into his parlor and into the kitchen. The only way to the back yard was through the sliding glass doors that was in front of his kitchen table. Georgia, Tennessee, Kentucky, North and South Carolina were bustling around, fighting for counter space as they went about getting pie dough ready. California was taking up half the counter space, dozens of beauty products laid out beside her. Minnesota also noted that it would be interesting squeezing by unnoticed, so she coughed and greeted everyone.
"Oh, hi guys! How are you guys doing today? Pretty good, ya?" She asked, waiting for a response, but per the norm everyone kinda just nodded at her and continued arguing over who stole who's pie filling, "Good! That's great!" She replied, ducking underneath Georgia's sudden puff of flour and squeezing out the sliding door.
"Did I just hear Min say 'yall'?" Georgia asked, "No wonder I can feel my ear bleedin!" the other states chuckled.
"Yeah, like legit." California said, flipping her golden blonde hair out of her face. "I mean, wtf, sis? Like…. Stick with the program, ya know?"
"Um, program?" Minnesota asked from the doorway, leaning back in when she heard her siblings talking about her.
"Ugh, you're so gullible it isn't even funny." California added, ending her remark with a snooty huff.
"Ha-ha…"Minnesota chuckled awkwardly, "Right. Good one. Um, yeah wanna play some bag-o later?"
"What the hell is bag-o?" Her obnoxious sister asked, "Sounds like something a weird person would say. What next? You're gonna ask me for a slice of 'cake-o'?"
"Oh sure, you betcha I could make ya some! Just some Jell-O and cake mix." Minnesota gave her a sweet smile, "But later, okay? I'm going to go meet up with all the other guys!"
"Yeah, Whatever. Why can't you be more like uncle Canada and disappear whenever it's convenient for us." California replied, filing her already perfect nails.
"Why I never! California! You best be apologizing to your sister right now, or you're not getting any pie later!" Georgia cut in.
"Fine." California retorted. "I'm on a new diet anyway, I can only eat avocados now."
"That ain't no diet!" Georgia yelled, "That's the ticket to an early grave. Dad always told us that." Georgia paused for a moment, she could sense that something was off. She lifted her head slightly and inhaled the air around them, "Tex! You done left the meat to char!" Without a second pause, Texas swung the door open, a bowl of homemade barbecue sauce was in his hand.
"Lord Almighty!" he cried, rushing over towards the smoker, "You done save the barbecue sis! Any second longer and it would have been a pile a rocks. Can I get you a coke for your troubles? What would you like?"
"Whatever you're having is fine with me." she said with a smile, happy to help Texas from not charring the barbecue (which is horrible, in case you've been fortunate enough to never taste it).
Minnesota decided that this was her time to make her leave, her siblings being distracted once more. She closed the screen door, bumping into New York as she did so.
"Oh, I'm so sorry Yorkie!" Minnesota started.
"Really, Minnie? I thought we were over that name. Remember what I told you last time? You can call me New York, or Tony. I'm not a dawg for Christ's sake!"
"But didn't Dad say you couldn't name yourself after his alien fri-" Minnesota started, before New York pressed a hand to her mouth.
"I told you to shut up about that. I gotta go, I was getting a call about this parade thing that's going on in the Big Apple. Later." New York brushed her aside and went inside to the kitchen.
Minnesota shook her head, knowing her brother didn't mean to be that way. Business was business to him, no way around it. She walked over to one of the coolers that was resting on the deck and propped it open. A sea of ice greeted her, as well as a picked over selection of pops. Hmmmm what to pick, what to pick she thought to herself, not being able to decide, and eventually picking up a Diet Coke.
The yard was full of other siblings, some in the pool, others playing croquet, bag toss, or horseshoe. The air smelled of roasting meat, and for the most part everyone seemed to be bickering lovingly. At least, as far as she could tell, no punches were being thrown. Yet. There was a bunch of tables and chairs laid out everywhere, and Minnesota spotted Florida in the hammock.
"Florida, hey!" Minnesota greeted as she walked over to the lazing state.
"Hola, Minnesota." Florida replied, lifting some sunglasses from her eyes to look at Minnesota. Florida had dark, wavy brown hair and brown eyes that fit her tan complexion, "How are you doing, this far south? Must be muy caliente for you. Of course, it's pretty perfect for myself."
"Well, it is a bit warm, perfect day for fishing though!"
"Fishing? You want the alligators to come get you?"
"Trust me," Minnesota laughed, "It's perfectly safe to go fishing in the lakes in the summer! Today would be a perfect day, in fact!"
"I see." she hummed, "I don't know why I am here, to be honest."
"Oh, that's too bad Florida. How's your...tourism going?" Minnesota asked in a friendly tone. She brushed a piece of blonde hair away from her face and straightened her glasses as she waited for the Floridian's response.
"Muy bueno. Miami is still a great place to be at the moment. There was a fiesta at little Havana today, so much food Minnesota! I simply ate too much! So, I come to Texas's place to take a quick siesta." Florida ended her sentence with a tired yawn.
"Oh of course, don't let me bother ya. I'll see ya later, for sure!" Minnesota cheerfully waved goodbye, walking over to the horseshoe pits, watching as Colorado swung the iron shoe into the air. It landed with a clang around the post, and everyone around cheered happily.
"Texas!" Colorado shouted, "Your turn bro hurry up!"
"Nice shot!" Minnesota joined in, taking a sip of her pop (aka soda/coke/fizzy drink for those who don't know) as she did so, "But we all know who's going to win Texas's favorite yard sport."
"Yep, me." Colorado said with confidence pressing his thumb into his chest.
"Yeah, the odds are not on your side, bro." Nevada chimed in from behind Minnesota, who jumped a bit, dribbling some pop down her midriff.
"Oh, awesome." She muttered, giving her brother a roll of her eyes before brushing it off.
"Sorry, Minnie." Nevada smiled mischievously, "Looks like it's not only Colorado who has bad luck today. I, of course, have the odds ever in my favor." He said the quote in a high pitch voice and if he had had a pink wig upon his head it would have been perfect.
"That's what you said last time we played poker, and if I recall, you were quite the sore loser." Colorado came over, having given up for the moment waiting for Texas to return to play his turn.
"Whatever Colorado, anyway I came to invite you guys to this game I'm hosting Saturday, at my place. Of course, the drinks will be free."
"Game?" Minnesota asked, curious.
"Yeah, some gambling fun. It's been like two weeks since our last intense round of Yahtzee. RSVP only, by the way. California already said she's in, what do ya say, you two?" Nevada asked, rolling his die around in his hand for dramatic effect.
"I'll think about it." Minnesota responded softly, as Colorado laughed and yelled out.
"Hell yeah! Another chance to beat you I am so there!" Before Nevada could say whatever witty remark was on his tongue, there was suddenly a very loud voice calling from the screen door.
"SUPPER'S UP YA YELLA BELLIES FIRST COME FIRST SERVE!"
There was cheers of excitement and a couple "God, finally!"s that rang through the crowd, as everyone ran up the steps to try and cram into the kitchen where the food was laid out, steaming. The vapors from the food were enough to make anyone drool. Corn on the cob, barbecued ribs, pulled pork, buns, beans, green beans, an array of all sorts of fresh fruits (including watermelon that looked almost too perfect to eat), and every kind of pie you could imagine was laid out for everyone on various platters and tables. There was also many arrays of barbeque sauces laid out on the table, clearly the southern states weren't over their barbeque war just yet.
"Eeeek! What is that?!" California, who was in the front of course, squealed as she came across the tater-tot hotdish.
"It's just a casserole, Cali, chill out." Washington yawned, "And get a move on, we're all starving away here!"
"Like, what? A casserole? Who brought a casserole to a barbeque?!" California screeched.
"Um...that was me…" Minnesota said softly, leaning her head out of the line and offering her sister an encouraging smile, "It has beef, cheese, celery, peas, and cream of mushroom sauce. Oh, and tater-tots on top! It's really good, I promise! I made it myself this morning! I… Uh… thought we were all bringing stuff?"
"My God!" The blonde girl screeched "You even eat like a weirdo!"
"And you're saying that avocados and camel milk isn't weird?!" Georgia said as she rose from her seat, shredded pork was hanging from her lips.
"Hey, at least I'll be young, healthy, and gorgeous forever." California responded with a flip of her perfect hair.
"It's ok if you don't want any, California, I for sure will have some!" North Dakota called from a couple states in front of Minnesota, "You've obviously never had Midwest hotdishes, so you're the one missing out! More for us!"
"Who's holding up the line?" New York called from a little farther back, and a chorus of "California" and "the usual" rang out in response, "Yo, Cali, move it! We all know you're only going to eat a piece of the watermelon so just move along before Louisiana curses you or something shitty like that!"
"Ugh, whatever!" California sighed, grabbing the smallest piece of watermelon she could find and took her seat in the sunlight.
"God, finally. I thought we'd never eat!" Vermont muttered as he started the line moving, grabbing his food and carrying on.
"Thanks for making Casserole, Minnesota, it's much appreciated!" South Carolina told Minnesota from the back.
"Oh, it was nothing. I also brought peanut butter bars!"
"You mean the crunchy ones with the fudge on top?"
"Yep! Those ones exactly!" Minnesota smiled.
"Awesome, don't tell anyone else cause I'll eat the whole thing!" South Carolina declared happily.
Minnesota laughed and got her food, making sure to take a sampling of everything, she wouldn't want to be rude after all! When she had a plate stacked pretty high, she looked around for a spot to sit at. Many of the places were full, California had commandeered half of one of the plastic tables, loudly claiming she needed space for her beauty to stay intact. She spotted some seats open by Texas and made her way over there, stepping over people's feet as they tried to trip her. After many years of living with 49 siblings, and you learn all their tricks! She sat down with a triumphant sigh.
"Hey, this looks awesome Texas! Thanks!" Minnesota told him, taking a piece of pork and smiling at the smoky smell coming from it. She took a bite, and as she'd expected, it was delicious, not too dry and perfectly smoked, "Wow, you've really mastered the art of barbeque, haven't you?"
"Course I have. Couldn't be the lone star state if I hadn't." Texas shrugged, the start of a smile tickling the corners of his mouth.
Louisiana plopped herself down across from them, somehow having acquired a stack of seafood. She was wearing a sparkling green mardi gras mask (sized down to the size of a hair bow) in her black curly hair. She had heavy eyeliner on and purple lipstick. She folded her legs over each other, showing off her white sandals. Louisiana grinned at the two of them, breaking a crab leg and taking a bite.
"So, what are we all talking about?" She asked, brushing her buttery fingers on her shorts, narrowly missing her light green t-shirt.
"How Texas knows how to throw an awesome barbeque!"
"Oh sweet! You know what would make this better, though?" Louisiana added, "Some tarot card readings!"
"Um…. Didn't you end up cursing Mississippi last time you did that voodoo stuff?" Minnesota asked uncomfortably. She remembered the sister-state being unable to eat chicken for a whole month. Needless to say, Mississippi had not been happy...and thus everyone else had been uncomfortable as well.
"That was hex dolls, this is completely different." She waved a hand at Minnesota dismissively, "Don't try an tell me you're not the least bit curious about your future?"
"No, not really…." Minnesota began, though she felt bad. She didn't want Louisiana to feel like she was being mean, maybe she ought to say yes anyway. Although, the readings never went well, sometimes it was best to stay away from that sort of thing.
"But…"Louisiana started.
"The little 'ne said no. Anna, let it go." Texas cut in.
"Alright, sheesh, I was just trying to have some fun. By the way, Tex, did you forget to invite Dad again?"
"No…" Texas said, shoving his mouth with beans. "I remembered writin' him the invitation, but then a coupla friends of mine decided to go on a huntin trip." Louisiana rolled her eyes, breaking another crab leg in frustration.
"Who still writes people in this day and age?" She asked taking a bite, "He's gonna be hella mad when he finds out, in that case."
"She has a point, what if he gets jealous?" Minnesota asked worriedly. Texas shrugged off their concerns, "Remember last time when he left us to go to England for a month? Our Uncle was calling us like crazy to get him back…."
"That's why I made extra pie and pork, I'm sure Pa will be fine." he muttered, his eyes narrowed.
"You sound as though you know he'll be around later, did he call ya?" Georgia asked, because she was of course a couple seats away, grouped with a couple more of the southern states.
"I may have received a voice recording from my answering machine." Texas shrugged as though he didn't much care if their father showed up or not, "But I also thought California might wanna eat some normal food for once."
"Not gonna happen, besides have you heard? She's had a…. Special visit from one of Dad's friend…" Louisiana muttered into Texas's ear.
California shot them all dirty looks, "Whatever you've heard is absolutely false! And I have a perfectly normal diet, thank you."
"Ooooh you had a special visitor, Cali? Do tell!" Florida mimicked her sister from another table.
"Who was it, hmmm? Maybe that Tony guy…. Scandalous!"
"Shut up! Like I don't know where you get your information, but it's like totes wrong!" California said, storming away and mumbling something about getting some tanning in. A few of the states mumbled something about France and Ontario, which cause California to get an enormous blush on her cheeks. Then she was gone and the whole hall let out a few good laughs.
"The food's really good!" Minnesota gave a nod to her southern siblings, who all grinned at her. It would be rude not to comment on the food, everyone knew that.
"Thanks darlin! Wait till ya try the pies! I promise peach pie will be the best!" Georgia smiled at her.
Minnesota stood up and cleared her plate, heading for the dessert table. There were definitely too many pies to have a piece of each, they would all be good anyway. Instead she grabbed a couple of her peanut bars and placed them in a party napkin.
"What are those? They look awesome, what kind of cookies are they?" New York, who had appeared out of nowhere, asked.
"They are good! Peanut Butter Bars are one of my favorite recipes." Minnesota smiled.
"Right, bars," New York commented, clearly not listening as he took a bite of the rectangular square covered with chocolate on the top, "They are good cookies though! Did you make these?"
"Uh...yeah…"
"Well they're great. Thanks dude!" New York smiled and waltzed away into the yard, where loud music could be heard. He froze when he entered the porch area and let out a very loud and annoyed, "Should have known it was New Jersey, explains why the music has sucked so far!"
Minnesota down the hall that led towards the bathroom. She passed the plethora of family photos featuring the various groupings of siblings: The four corners, West Coast, New England, Midwest...
She paused at the Midwest, looking at the lot of them: the Dakotas, Wisconsin, Illinois, Iowa, Michigan, and herself. They were all carefully balancing on a canoe in one of the great lakes. She smiled when she remembered that shortly after this was taken the canoe had tipped and they had all fallen into the waters. Luckily it was summertime and they had been wearing their swimming wear anyway.
Minnesota shook her head at the picture and washed her hands in the bathroom. Barbeque meats were delicious, but they were definitely a really messy meal. Once this was done, she went outside and went over to the game of bag-o being played. Bean bags soaring through the air and landing with a thud on the slanted wooden platforms. Each of the platforms was painted for a football team of Texas': one for the Cowboys and one for the Texans. The bean bags being tossed were also appropriately themed. Minnesota opted to watch the end of the current game between Kentucky, Tennessee, Wyoming, and Alaska, namely because it looked like it was becoming rather intense.
"Told ya," Tennessee was saying, "I have got a better arm than you, just admit it Ken and everything will be even."
"Unlikely to happen, considering you completely missed the board last turn." Kentucky smirked at his sister. Tennessee promptly glared at him.
"I was giving you a bit of leeway because you're losing so badly." Tennessee said, dodging Alaska's toss as it flew through the air.
Suddenly a section of the wooden fence that lines the yard fell into the dirt and caused a wave of dust to fly into the air. The states nearest the fence coughed, attempting to wave away the dust. From the cloud of dirt, a figure rolled into a grassy patch and stood up. America stood with his feet apart, one arm on his hips and the other in the air. No doubt he thought this an appropriate pose for a hero. Minnesota held back a giggle.
"Don't worry dudes! The party can begin now!" America yelled to all the states, who were staring at him. There was a couple cheers, a couple groans, but mostly a wave of blank stares.
"Always the damn fence. I just finished fixin' it up the other day…." Texas groaned from Minnesota's side.
"I'm sorry Dad ruined your fence again, Texas. At least it's a smaller portion than last time, and no leaking pool too!" Minnesota tried to offer helpfully, but Texas was busy storming over to their father. She followed after, curiosity getting the better of her. Also, if a fight broke out she'd have to be sure to break it up. People definitely wanted to be around when Texas went off, it was usually worth watching. Many of her siblings had the same idea, seeing the upset look on Texas' face.
"Look pa, if ya want to be bustin' through my fence, then that's fine. But, ya need to pay for the damages." Texas told his father in a strangely calm and yet angry tone.
"Hey kid, calm down! Did you ever see Superman paying for all the buildings he'd torn down? No. So take a chill pill and let's party like it's 1999!" Texas groaned in frustration, placing his palm over his head as he grumbled an insult to his father, "Anyway I should be the one that's mad at you dudes, not inviting me to the party? I mean come on!" America muttered something about if being the 5th time this year under his breath.
"Maybe there's a reason that no one wanted you to show up!" Texas continued to groan, he then turned his back so he could pick up the scattered pieces of wood. America could feel the impact of the Texan's words punching against his heart. The country had a very hurt expression on his face, his shoulders even started to sag.
"What do you mean you dudes don't want me to be here," America turned to California, "Is this true?" California, who was on her phone during the entire ordeal, looked up and huffed at her father.
"Yeah dad." She said bluntly, "You always embarrass us."
America looked at all of the states for confirmation of this statement. Many of them avoided eye contact with him and just shrugged in his direction. Minnesota bit her lip, this was supposed to be a happy event, surely she could do something to keep it that way.
"That's not true," Minnesota started, "I'm glad to see you dad, or else all this extra food would go to waste! But….between all of us, I think we'd like it better if you used the front door. I mean Texas works really hard to make his fence look nice all the time, ya know?" Minnesota gave her father her usual smile, hating that sulking expression he had.
"You're right. You all are, I'm the father, and here I am being told off by my kids," America attempted a chuckle and turned towards Texas with a serious expression, "Look, Texas, I'm sorry. Let me help you fix it."
Before the state could stubbornly refuse his father's offer, America walked to his son and assisted in cleaning up the scraps. "If we don't have enough lumber to fix this fence, then I'll go to the store and buy you some more!"
Texas and America began working on fixing the fence, America bringing Texas some wood from the piles by the house. The party went on as usual, Tennessee climbed onto the stage and shooing New Jersey away so she could play her 'better music' which was just pure country. Luckily, America and Texas were able to finish with some wood to spare. The rest of the states who had been watching the whole ordeal readily ran into the house to fetch some pie for the hard workers. They handed the two plates piled high with pie and vanilla ice cream. The day seemed to be going well, aside from the minor setback, and it wasn't until very late that people started to disband. Texas invited anyone to stay over, especially if they were quite a ways away, and began pairing states up to stay in the nice ranch style home. As Minnesota curled into her bed that night, with a softly snoring North Dakota on the other bed, she smiled at the thought of everyone having such a good time. Indeed it had been too long since they had all been together like this.